I have depression and anxiety help please!?!

I have depression and anxiety help please!?

OK so im 17 years old and I sometimes feel depressed like I wanna kill myself.But also I have anxiety like when I'am in class I get really nervous like I'am oing to do something stupid and turn red and everybody will laugh at me.So I was wondering what type of medication can I take I dont want to go to a dctor because I would rather not have my parents know about this so what over the counter medication is good?

The fact that you don't want your parents to know about this suggests that your relationship with your parents is part of the problem. As much as you want to be independent and take care of this yourself, you have several competing interests:
1. As a matter of pride, you do not want to seem weak or inadequate.
2. You know that your feelings are getting in the way of your goals.
3. You don't feel you have the right to be angry at (who?), so you get depressed about it. I certainly don't know who, and you may not even know who.
4. You have some sort of control issue going on with your parents - you need to be strong to protect yourself from having your parents run your life.

Bottom line: Your perception of the world, and your life in it, is in conflict either with the reality around you OR your belief system(s). You are unable to resolve this conflict without going outside yourself (hence your question).

Important things to know:
1. It's ok to ask for help. It does not mean you are a weakling. It does not mean you are a failure.
2. What you don't know CAN hurt you. You are feeling the pain already.
3. Not all experts are equally expert. They call it practicing medicine because it's practiced on people, and no two people are alike. Most people have similar patterns, or they'd call it experimenting, not practicing. But similar is NOT identical. So you need to be careful about how you proceed.
4. Killing yourself doesn't solve any problem. Even though it may feel that way, all it does is transfer your mess to someone else to clean up. That's not fair to you, and it's not fair to someone else (whoever that may be).
5. You are a teenager - you are biologically NOT wired to be able to fix this yourself - for at least another 4 years. There's scientific research behind that statement, it's not meant to be a 'feel good' statement.
6. You want help - you just don't know the best way to get it. Call your pediatrician or internist - directly. Don't ask your parents' permission. If they but in, simply explain that you need help getting to the point to explain to them what's going on with you. IF they don't like it, then ask them, do they want you to be healthy or not?
7. You are not trying to freeze them out, but you need to be able to give them straight answers - and since you don't know the answers, it's frustrating for you to not be able to give them what both you and they want.
8. Medication alone will NOT make you better. Time will help. Finding someone to talk to who is trained and experienced in your issues can help make you better.
9. Making you better may not mean making you feel better.

I could go on, but that's enough. Know that people care, even if they don't know you. Know that others have had to go through the kind of pain you're going through, survived it, and went on to be happy. You can be happy again, even though it doesn't feel like it right now.

Good luck - start with your regular doctor - they can help you find what/who you need if they can't help you themselves. It' THEIR job to do that - so let them do their job. It's your job to get through school and finish the task ahead of you - growing into a fully functioning adult. You're close, but not there yet.