Small Guys and Low Self-Esteem.?!
Question: 5'8, 150lbs here! About a week ago I asked a similar question, but the results weren't exactly what I was looking for.
I guess the big question is - How does a small guy fight thoughts of being inferior? This isn't just about the question of whether girls will ever be interested (although that is a problem too). This issue for me is a lot deeper than that. I genuinely believe that I will never be as much of a man as anyone else. I even feel embarassed around my friends, and prefer to be by myself. I tend to be the butt of all the jokes, and seem to be withdrawing from society more and more.
I know I should just "accept myself for who I am," but that's easier said than done.
Answers: 5'8, 150lbs here! About a week ago I asked a similar question, but the results weren't exactly what I was looking for.
I guess the big question is - How does a small guy fight thoughts of being inferior? This isn't just about the question of whether girls will ever be interested (although that is a problem too). This issue for me is a lot deeper than that. I genuinely believe that I will never be as much of a man as anyone else. I even feel embarassed around my friends, and prefer to be by myself. I tend to be the butt of all the jokes, and seem to be withdrawing from society more and more.
I know I should just "accept myself for who I am," but that's easier said than done.
Hey Matt,
Here's what you're doing to yourself: you're finding the one thing you don't like that is actually something you cannot change, and you obsess with it... because it's just that: something you cannot change. Please understand that I'm not saying this to be mean to you. I've read your previous question and you seem to be a very articulate person with lots to offer. You've lived through some harsh circumstances in your life and, more than your physical attributes, those are the things that really shaped your opinion of yourself. But you have been THROUGH them and now emerging, and I really admire you for this. I believe you got what it takes to gain the guidance and wisdom you need to re-build yourself.
You're on the right track, kid. Keep your hopes up and take care.
If you are healthy, then be very grateful. Be big at heart and honor and trust. Become more spiritual, whatever path rings most true to you. Meditate and be in the present beautiful moment.
Peace
Are you talking about physical stature or penis size? 5'8" isn't that small. Just don't get "short man's disease". Then, you'll really be hated.
People are just picking on you because there is something to go for. As soon as someone else with a different physical attribute comes along, they'll leave you alone.
Until then, learn to take their jokes and don't worry too much. Jesus loves you!
just think on the bright side no one will ask you to reach really high things and they do that alot when your tall or so my cuz says... You aren't a small guy your like 4 inches taller the me. and well i'm the butt of the joke when i'm with my friends too but is not a tall short thing with me it a i'm not a $lutt thing...oh yeah and you need to lighten up a little laugh at yourself i know it's hard but it gits easier the more you do it and if somene makes a joke about you make one right back at them...you a big compared to the guys i hang with my best guy friend is 4'8" so you are tall and he is like 19 years old!
Oh my stars, oh my stars. I'm 5'4" and was 115 lbs.,(now 180) was called Punk (in the black community the gay version not the punk rock type), not athletic, no girlfriends., no friends.
Bro you have to set Your Standards, Goals and not let others be the Conditional guideline for your life. Steam roll past them and do what you want, steam roll past them and choose your life paths.
Really Too much to share in this little space and time.
Two-two has spoken.
For people that have had a past abusive history, the smaller the guy the better. Small guys may seem less threatening to someone that has been mistreated.
Small Is Good!!!
Uhmmm isn't 5'8 tall?
My ex was 5'8..but the thing is being accepted by society isn't always the solution, sometimes it's better to be alone than to hang with the wrong crowd.
Having thoughts of being inferior is nothing to be ashamed of too, I mean trust me when I say your not alone, even though it may not mean much (i am a girl) both sexes get a lot of the same bull.
If a guy has a lot of girls coming at him it's fine...if it's a girl she's a whore...
If a guy is sensitive he's automaticly gay...but if it's a girl it's okay...
I guess what I'm trying to say, is not to worry too much about it. I'm eighteen afterall and they say this is the age where we question ourselves a lot, it's alright if you feel this way, I do too...my friends and I go to clubs, but you think that makes me feel better? Deep down I wanna scream, go home and watch tv or read a book, it's just the way i am, you know it's just that I'm different, which I'm somewhat proud of...the only reason i put up with it is because I wanna try things I don't like, so that i can one day know what it feels like..
Time brings new expierences, and new expierences allow you to see things clearer, but take things slowly.
Really ask yourself: Why do you want a girlfriend? Will that help you be accepted by society?
If your friends are making fun of you, don't you think maybe they're just envious about you because they see qualities in you that you can't see in yourself...as sad as it may sound there are people who put down others so they can feel good about themselves.
It's fine if you can't accept yourself, many people out there can't either, it's better to know that your imperfect, than to live in denial and think that you are...
I really really hope this helps...
if anything....redsilky_sleep@yahoo
You can be 5'8 on the outside but 7 feet tall on the inside.. it is what is in your heart that makes you tall..I am 5'9..by the way that is the same as Emmit Smith, ever hear of him? I could cite a hundred others but thats not required.. what is required is that you do what Emmit did.. hold yourself to a higher standard.. I am 67 years old.. 5'9 and weigh 170.. I play golf with twelve other men, some younger and some a little older.. I wear a white cap that has a big Red S on it in a triangle.. the superman logo.. have been doing that for two years now.. four years ago I was a pretty good golfer.. but these guys were always taking my money.. some would give me strokes and still beat me.. they are all friends of mine and we have always respected each other.. but we are also competitive and want to kick each others behind.. I got tired of loosing and sick of getting strokes.. so I decided to raise the level of my game.. I bought the cap in Miami Fla.. returned to Oklahoma.. bought some better golf clubs.. put on red white and blue colors.. even put a big red S on my golf balls.. my mind set was to win the money... my friends call me Superman.. and they all want me on their team.. they all want to watch me hit he ball and they all expect me to score well.. I out drive the rest of them.. I hit it straighter.. and am more accurate.. and no one NOT ANYONE.. will even think about letting me have an extra stroke.. I don't always win all he money.. because the other guys are still good.. and all of them have raised the level of their game.. because they are playing against Superman... An old friend of mine once told me.. if you dress like a bum..you look like a bum..if you look like a bum and act like a bum.. YOU ARE A BUM... now with that in mind.. I suggest you find a higher level of thinking.. build your persona.. you will gain confidence and you will respect yourself.. so will everyone else... I am not tall.. but I walk tall, play tall and act tall.. by the way.. so does Emmit Smith.. now if you are a bit lost by all this.. I suggest that you go to the nearest TAE KWAN DO instructor.. yes you will learn to use your physical power.. but more importantly.. you will be taught a philosophy of how to live and be happy.. It is an amazing education... and an uplifting dicipline.. get involved with a higher standard and you will be a lot taller in everyones eyes..including your own.. good luck.. SM
You don't sound 'small' at all to me. But then again maybe you should just date short girls like me, haha. (I'm 5'3")
I hate the norms that ar put on us by the society. We come to this world and we enslave us by our own standards. Please don't torture yourself about stupid things like that, because size is just a size, who cares