How can I stop feeling bad about being shy, soft-spoken and sensitive?!


Question: I'm always hesitant to open up to others. I have very few close friends even tho I'm an incredibly compassionate person and try to reach out in my own quiet way. Starting to feel as if I don't belong and that I just don't fit in. I'm soft-spoken and remain quiet when in a large group and don't like when all attention is on me because I start to get flustered and blush. I'm better when it's one-on-one. In a group setting, I often feel unheard and overlooked if everyone's talking. So I regress. I wish I could totally be myself around others and not have things affect me so deeply. Is there anything positive about being shy, soft-spoken and sensitive?


Answers: I'm always hesitant to open up to others. I have very few close friends even tho I'm an incredibly compassionate person and try to reach out in my own quiet way. Starting to feel as if I don't belong and that I just don't fit in. I'm soft-spoken and remain quiet when in a large group and don't like when all attention is on me because I start to get flustered and blush. I'm better when it's one-on-one. In a group setting, I often feel unheard and overlooked if everyone's talking. So I regress. I wish I could totally be myself around others and not have things affect me so deeply. Is there anything positive about being shy, soft-spoken and sensitive?

There is much to be happy about being shy and soft spoken! I can hear loud and clear that you are a gift to this universe. We need more who are sensitive and it's OK to be soft spoken. Smart people listen to what quiet people say! I also get that you are a compassionate person...another gift to rest of the world!! Learn to love yourself just as you are. There are tons of folks who don't like attention drawn to them and feel uncomfortable when it happens. This doesn't make you a person who doesn't fit in!!! Now enough preaching about how wonderful you are and how I want you to love yourself. I am going to give you a little advise and believe me it works! Join "Toastmasters" it's an amazing tool to help you overcome these fears of speaking up in a crowd or group setting. If that's not an option, just try speaking a little louder. Sooner or later, you will be heard! Good luck sweetie!

It is said that if you have one great friend in a lifetime, you have been blessed. Maybe your expectations are high. You sound terriffic. Are you lonely? Church youth groups are good. If you are older, church groups are still great places to try out skills and gain strength and confidence.

Yes,you don't hurt others feelings.But you must travel more to overcome your shyness.

you are just like me. I wouldn't wish it on anyone. My closest friends know me and I open up to them. The positive is we are compassionate, caring people.

Stop feeling bad about it. You can't help who you are. You'll just have to accept that. The positive of being shy is that you won't make any bold mistakes that an outgoing person would make. The positive of being soft-spoken is that you wouldn't say things you would regret as much. The positive of being sensitive is that you can feel other people's feelings. Love yourself!

Just try being yourself. Being shy is just like any other problem - you have to face it. Try to blend in, to talk, to get involved when in large groups of people. The first times may be rough because if you're like this you probably feel unheard and overlooked even if you're not. But with time and practice you should be ok.

Well I honestly know exactly what you are feeling since i felt the same way for a long time! But what you need to do is start interacting with different people slowly take your time dont rush yourself! not with the people you know though gots to be with people you dont then you can make it up to 2 more people next thing you know u will start to feel more and more comfortable. And when your talking dont think bout yourself think about what you are talking bout, the reason your getting so shy is cuz you are constantly thinking ohhh what is she thinking or how do ilook man im dumb bla bla bla. try to focus your mind on the conversation itself. Not a positive thing but you can grow out of it !!THATS POSITIVE>

There are. It is part of your personality of being shy; soft-spoken, and sensitive. For one thing you aren't arrogant, and you most likely won't get friends who are bad influence. You would attract good people who appriectate you for yourself.

im the same!! find something u r good at and get ppl to appreciate it, this billeds up ur confidence! good luck

Im the exact same as you, i guess thats something to remember...your not alone. Im very shy and quiet in groups, and i work with alot of outgoing loud people, so it seems more so that im quiet. I think people get the impression that im stuck up or something cuz i dont say anything, but really im just shy. I hate being misinterpreted and I have been working on gaining confidence. One thing that helps is to try to emerge myself in challenging situations and practice being more confident. Remember that what you have to say is valid and that you dont care what others will think. Dont let others get to you, even tho its hard not too.... over time you will learn

Ever tried working behind a bar. there's nothing like having a good reason to talk to people. I promise this will help.

Also, you say that you just wish you could be yourself around others. Well you already are, your shy and soft spoken. Changing your personality is very difficult and impossible in the same setting/way of life. To change you need a major life changing event. I'm not being funny, but a GoGo dancer would definately make a difference.

You are a lot less likely to stick your foot in your mouth, and people probably think you are nice, thoughtful.

There is nothing wrong at all with choosing your words carefully, in fact, usually people will listen all the harder to hear what you have to say. This inherently gives you more personal power.

You still have to watch that people don't think you are stuckup, or let them treat you bad because you don't speak up for yourself.

Some people who are quiet and shy don't want to hurt people's feelings or ruffle any feathers. I have found that when you say exactly what you want to say, your compassion will filter it. Usually you don't hurt others' feelings because you don't WANT to hurt their feelings.

I think you are gifted and a gift to the world. There are plenty of loudmouths like me. Just don't let people run over you.

I'm shy too. I used to feel bad about it some times. It's okay to be shy, that's just who you are. If you want to work on being more outgoing, that's okay too.

Don't try to solve the whole problem in one day. Take small steps. Join a gym or a club or do some volunteer work. Find a friend who is more outgoing and spend time with them.

Is there anything positive about being a caring, sensitive person? Answer: YES.

I can be the same way. It took me a long time to just loosen up. I think the more we mature, the more we realize its ok to be ourselves. More importantly, learn to love ourselves. A very positive about being soft-spoken is that you usually don't annoy the hell out of people like the loud obnoxious people do.

i go through the same things its hard sometimes i feel like i cant breathe but ive learned that you just have to take a deep breathe and try to elax you know your a great person so let everyone she it it does take some time but youll do fine dont miss out on stuff youll regret it later trust me

I suggest that you need an exorcist !
Do you know Padre Ralph ?

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I can understand you very well, I also have this problem!

Being Shy,Soft spoken and over and above, being Sensitive are some of the qualities, you dont find in many. I consider them, to be god gifted. Such qualities, in a girl enhances her femininity, making her an object of desire for all. I dont know why should you feel sorry for such excellent qualities.Yes, if you feel timid amidst a group, henceforth try to be friendly with every one.Of-course,being friendly does'nt mean forcing your self on others.Maybe a start can be made initially on general topics of interest.You'll be surprised how quickly you can make friends. There's no need to be hesitant. Remember, you possess some of the finest qualities in you.Be positive in your thinking.Never feel self centric.Stop bothering, what others feel about you.Be your natural self. Your reticence does not allow others to know about you,so open up.Let others know the qualities you possess.Enjoy life.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with being shy and sensitive in general, unless you think there is an underlying issue?

I have pretty much always been shy and sensitive, especially growing up, but in my early twenties when i started to avoid social situations, i knew there was other issues that needed addressing and after discussing it with two doctors i was diagnosed with social anxiety.

I'm not saying this is the case with you because some people are just naturally shy, but it wouldn't hurt to speak to a professional if it worries you.

Some of the most caring people who i know, or have ever met, have been shy and sensitive.

It's just apart of who you are and it's an admirable trait to many people.

I am the same way. It can be really hard. If it really worries you then talk to a doctor about it.

Well, i'm shy and softspoken too.I used to feel bad about it too. But i don't anymore for the following reasons.
1.The more you feel bad abt being shy...the more people will make you feel bad.
2. There is nothing wrong in being shy.come to think of it,what do you mean by being shy?
You are smart to think before you speak
You think twice before saying anything that hurts others or
something that is stupid.so what's wrong in that?
3.People like outspoken people because they talk a lot and entertain a group. But we don't need too many of them.
Hey someone need to listen to them...poor guys!!
4.We call some people as outspoken because there are others who are shy.There need to be different types of people in this world like different colours to make it beautiful.
5. You need to change yourselves only if your job requires that you interact with lot of people. But there are lots of jobs out there which does not require you to be outspoken and you are more comfortable with yourselves.
6. Its okay to be shy and softspoken ..but its not ok to be afraid of others or what they think of you. If others like you for who u are ..good for them. if they don't like ..its their problem.
Why should it bother you?

I hope this helps!!! good luck! happy new year!!

do something that gets you out in social situations until you get comfortable, like become a stripper or a gogo girl





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