18 with social phobia....?!
Question: So i'm 18 and i left school at 15 and went home schooling....i have no friends,never had a bf or dated a guy....my social phobia isn't that bad cause i go out with my parents and with my sis though only like once a week....I'm afraid i'll never find friends cause everyone here is SO MUCH into clubbing and partying and drinking....and i'm just not into all this....and anyone who's not into it is considered lame....i live in a small town and i guess ppl criticize me a lot and think i'm weird so i decided to move to the city this April and get a roomate but i'm just scared she'll be like all the others.....
Answers: So i'm 18 and i left school at 15 and went home schooling....i have no friends,never had a bf or dated a guy....my social phobia isn't that bad cause i go out with my parents and with my sis though only like once a week....I'm afraid i'll never find friends cause everyone here is SO MUCH into clubbing and partying and drinking....and i'm just not into all this....and anyone who's not into it is considered lame....i live in a small town and i guess ppl criticize me a lot and think i'm weird so i decided to move to the city this April and get a roomate but i'm just scared she'll be like all the others.....
I am also 18(in 2 weeks) and have it. And yeah it does suck, but I am working on it and hopefully one day I will defeat it.
Good Luck
Remember not everyone is the same so stop freaking out and don't give in to peer pressure. Stick to your values and beliefs.
i hate being around alot of people too
Just try to immerse yourself into the community little by little. Start by taking walks and saying "hi" to people you meet. Try to start a conversation with someone on the subway. Don't let them bother you if they criticize you. Everybody has a critic, and most of us judge without realizing it.
i have this problem now because I'm not a big drinker and I'm 21 so that's all my old friends do. i have just come to the realization that people love there parties and drinks. you should stay yourself. i have taken up hobbies and taken up more school classes. i feel I'm bettering myself while there being drunken messes. its good your not that way trust me. just start up a hobby or go for a jog, or take up a class. now i have no problem shopping by myself, its kinda piece full god bless
Very few people wake up in the morning and say, "Well, I'm gonna be a huge asshole today" People just end up being that way because of their own issues. One of the best ways to deal with that is to learn how to read into people and call them on it.
People are generally pretty lenient on people that they consider generally "weird", but haven't done anything they can poke at you on. Its best to carry yourself with confidence and a smug smile around hypercritical types, and they might still say stuff but they don't have the meaning anymore in their brains. Edit: They''ll feel uncomfortable saying it, even if they don't show it.
Not all possible roommates are club people. It sounds like you come from a background where your family has had the greatest concern about your well being and education. That is something to be thankful for...not worried about. Your upbringing has seemingly given you a better outlook for the future than many others have had. Finding a compatible roommate isn't a snap. Possibly it would be better for you to find a job, get a temporary convenience/studio apartment, and then choose from one of your fellow workers or clients whom you should have had time to get to know before getting and sharing a regular apartment. Placing ads in newpapers has never proven successful for me...and, in some cases, could be downright dangerous. You might further wish to get involved in additional activities such as volunteer work at a local church, hospital or library...lots of chances to meet others.
ok look, girls are nasty and u have to deal with that, pear persure is also nasty u have to deal with that too,
ppl are basicly nasty
you have to learn to not be afraid of those types of ppl, they just want to put u down. if things don't work out try to make them better but don't try too hard. be urself and someone will find you and like you just the way you r. what ppl think isn't imortent @ ALL u just gotto learn how to deal with them!
good luck!
I have some social phobia too. Perhaps you need to talk with a licensed therapist about coping and stress management techniques such as deep breathing and other ways to feel more comfortable wherever you are. I do deep breathing by slowly breathing in thru my nose and slowly out thru pursed lips -- though only a couple of times and then breathe normally. I still tend to stick with the smaller crowds and even may take breaks in between such as going to the restroom or such. I also take prozac, an ssri (selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor) antidepressant, for the anxiety as well as depression and ocd/obsessive-compulsive disorder. Just please keep in mind that even the people that seem the most flawless and perfect still get judged and talked about. I try to keep that in mind and tell myself that they are just people and are no better than me :)
For more info: http://www.adaa.org There may be a support group nearby, however, not in place of actual therapy.
You thought about giving counselling a try and finding out why you may have social phobia?
I've just turned 25 and broke up with my partner and seem to share a few of the same fears you do. E.g. a lot of the people I know are into clubbing etc and I can't stand it. Because of this im concerned about meeting new people.
However, i've started seeing a counsellor and whilst its slow work, it does explain a lot of things and why I feel the way I do in certain situations. He keeps reassuring me that despite how im currently feeling, its not going to be like this the whole time. There are plenty of people out there who are understanding of the matter and share similar interests and when the time's right you will meet them.