I think I'm going crazy!?!
Question: I really don't even know what to say. I'm 15 and I have a great life..loving family/friends, great grades, etc. I constantly think about death and I honestly don't see myself being alive in the next couple of months. I wish something bad would happen to me sometimes and I know that's horrible, but it's the truth. I'm not depressed, but I do think of suicide. I think about stupid things a lot, a name for instance or an object....they just fascinate me. It's hard to understand. I just feel like screaming or something because I don't know what to do anymore. I can't even talk to anyone about it because I know they won't understand if I don't myself. And I don't believe in God, so praying is not an option. Ahh, do I even have a problem here? What can i doooo?
Answers: I really don't even know what to say. I'm 15 and I have a great life..loving family/friends, great grades, etc. I constantly think about death and I honestly don't see myself being alive in the next couple of months. I wish something bad would happen to me sometimes and I know that's horrible, but it's the truth. I'm not depressed, but I do think of suicide. I think about stupid things a lot, a name for instance or an object....they just fascinate me. It's hard to understand. I just feel like screaming or something because I don't know what to do anymore. I can't even talk to anyone about it because I know they won't understand if I don't myself. And I don't believe in God, so praying is not an option. Ahh, do I even have a problem here? What can i doooo?
i have no clue why im answering this question well because im not answering it. im jsut like you kind of.
i think about death all the time. constantly. you can tell me something and everything in my mind always ends up leading to death. im 14, and i dont want to die. i truly dont bc im looking forward to life bc i have so many things i want to do with my life. life is my most treasured possesion. last year, i was obsessed with suicide. i had all these ways planned out. how i would commit suicide. now i see it was stupid and no one should do it. i used to not believe in God but, my friend asked me to go to church with her when i did, i found a whole other world that i didnt know about really. now i talk to God all the time through prayer. hes always there for me and i need that. hes already showing me ways to help myself with friends and family things that come up. we're teenagers and our bodies are changing, mentally and physically. everybody goes through phases like this. i suggest finding someone you are completley confortable with and who will listen. at first they may not understand (none fo my friends understand my death theories and why everything leads up to death) but after a while they'll see that you trully feel this way and they'll understand that you need them. this may not work for you but for me, talking helps everything.
like i said i wasnt answering your question, i was just telling you what i do to help me cope with this "phase"
and your not crazy, trust me
You sound pretty normal for a 15 yo. If you are depressed, go see a counselor or psychologist. If you just think you're weird, join the club.
I hope I can help you sweety. Please don't commit suicide. That wont solve anything. Sometimes we go through things that to us seem like its the end of the final straw but there is a bright side. Think of those who have nothing....we have to be grateful everyday in life. Please I ask that you consider counseling. Sometimes it helps to have someone opinionated and without any personal feelings or agenda to help us sort out our feelings. I get counseling and actually you can be surprised at how many people get counseling.
at the age of 15, you are changing from a girl to a woman biologically. There are many hormones coursing through your body which cause these odd effects. Speak to a school counselor and they WILL listen and suggest methods of dealing with your thoughts or refer you to a licensed psychologist for further treatment if needed.
it could be a phaze.
If not, then atleast you realize that you are in such a state
try to not worry about it. And don't burn me for this, but you should go to church and hear the gospel.
You're not going crazy. Honestly, you sound like a totally typical teenager to me (and yes, I was one at some point, so I do remember). ;o)
Your post sounds like it flows between positive and negative. You love your friends and family, but you think about death. You're not depressed, but you think about suicide. Hormones make your moods wildly fluctuate.
The only real concern I have is your talk of suicide. Why do you want to kill yourself if you have a great life?
Talk to someone about it. People understand more than you think, because most of us have all experienced the same feelings at one point or another.
Also, if you're feeling frustrated all the time like you're just going to explode, start exercising. I know it sounds dumb, but scientifically, exercise balances your brain chemicals as well as giving you a way to work out your frustrations in a healthy way, instead of directing those frustrations towards negative thought.
Choose to think good things. That also sounds corny, I realize, but just try it for a day, and see how you feel. I was miserable in life until I stopped expecting bad things to happen. Good luck sweetie. And get help if you need it. At the age of 15 there is no way possible for you to comprehend the permanency of death. Trust me. Life is so big and can be so wonderful, don't cut it short and rob yourself of chances to enjoy it. Just because you're not enjoying it right now doesn't mean that you'll never be happy to be alive.
Suicide is a permanent reaction to temporary feelings and problems.
death might be fascinating to you because it is the unknown. if you want to change that then think about life and live it to your fullest potential.
You say you aren't depressed, but it sure sounds like you are depressed. Suicidal thoughts and ruminating about death are signs of depression. And people who are depressed often don't know they're depressed. See a psychologist/psychiatrist/therapist.
i think your going through a mid-life crises just stay calm and everything will be ok