I am dying and its killing my best friend.?!
Question: ive asked this question but i havent got many answers and i appreciated them. i just need more.
im 14 im on a whole lot of medication and i have a couple weeks - months to actually live.
and im not afraid of dying really, im honestly just afraid of what ill miss and not having enough time to figure out what i want to do.
but im not the problem..
its my best friend she is really scared for me and strongly believes ill be Fine and a miracle will happen. well i just found out today i wont be fine after all and like i said my time is cut down short. i feel like i am ruining her life and i hate it. i love that girl and i feel like im tearing her life apart.
how can i tell her??
how can i help her deal with this with me??
ill miss her alot and i hate to see her unhappy
so please help
or pray for her
she needs it more than me.
Answers: ive asked this question but i havent got many answers and i appreciated them. i just need more.
im 14 im on a whole lot of medication and i have a couple weeks - months to actually live.
and im not afraid of dying really, im honestly just afraid of what ill miss and not having enough time to figure out what i want to do.
but im not the problem..
its my best friend she is really scared for me and strongly believes ill be Fine and a miracle will happen. well i just found out today i wont be fine after all and like i said my time is cut down short. i feel like i am ruining her life and i hate it. i love that girl and i feel like im tearing her life apart.
how can i tell her??
how can i help her deal with this with me??
ill miss her alot and i hate to see her unhappy
so please help
or pray for her
she needs it more than me.
i dont have answers for this but i prayed for you and her.
yeah we will pray .
death is part of life and your friend has to realize that it eventually comes to all of us, some sooner than others, tell her that you don't know when you'll be leaving her side but that when you do you'll still be there for her, tell her to enjoy the rest of your days spending time together and builiding memories together.
First, you need to show her your true feelings. Tell her how you really feel. Let her feel your acceptance, love, and fear. Make her a part of your feelings. Show her what you want her to be doing once you pass on... to be successful, to be happy, and to keep your memories, hopes and dreams alive within her.
Second, make her understand what is death. Everyone's afraid of death (ok, not everyone cuz i've been there... long story) but death is a part of life. That although you are dying it does not mean you will fade away into nothingness. Death is a continuation of life life from infant, toddler, puberty, adulthood, old age and death then beyond.
Finally, reassure her. Reassurance that you will always be close and beside her in her journey through life. Make her promise that she will live for your sake if not for hers. That her success and her happiness will make you happiest. That you will always be there with her until it's her time to cross the other side.
The best thing you can do, I think, is tell her exactly what you've said here - that you're OK with what's happening, and that you hate to see her unhappy. But - she will need to go through her grief and despair and her sense of powerlessness - she'd do anything to make the outcome different and feeling helpless is horrible. In some ways, it's easier for you (I don't mean it's easy, as I can't think of anything worse than facing death at 14), because you are the one going through what you're going through, while she is not inside the experience but is having to witness it and feel the impact. Let her have her distress - let yourself know that this is part of how she is expressing her love for you. She needs to be upset in order to come to terms with things - and you need to let go of feeling responsible. Perhaps discovering how to let go is the task for you in the last weeks or months.
Get her the book Many Lives, Many Masters by Brian Weiss. Brian Weiss was a world renowned therapist who stumbled upon a patient's past life memories during a hypnosis session. I recommend this book for everyone, but I'd especially recommend it for people dealing with death. And you don't have to believe in reincarnation to gain from its insights.
spend your remaning time with her, try to explain it to her as best as you can. also I'm sorry that you are going to die that young, but if the lord wants you back then he will take you back( sorry im a christian)
Your eternal salvation is the most important thing to gain from life on earth. God sent His Son, the Lord Jesus Christ, to earth so that you can spend eternity with Him. For you to do this, you have to be born again as Jesus said in the bible. To be born again, you have to ask Jesus to be your Lord and your Savior and to forgive you of your sins. All those who do not accept Jesus, reject God's plan to save them and will spend eternity with Satan and his followers in the lake of eternal fire. Your eternal salvation means everything. Just pray to Jesus and He will save you. God bless! www.jesusisreal.org
You sound ok with your diagnosis. The problem is your friend and how she's going to cope. Sometimes the best we can be is how we handle our experience. You can be a teacher here. You can show her so much about acceptance..about conquering fear...about letting go...about just being. You can teach her lessons that will take her to places she never dreampt of. This is your lesson to her. She might not know it right now....but you will show her. Death has a wisdom so profound. It touches you....and it touches everyone you come in contact with. Sometimes, this is your greatest gift..... teaching people how to let go and surrender to something out of their control.
Even friends must be left to travel their own path.