What is it like to have bipolar disorder?!
Question: What is it like to have bipolar disorder? Is it hard for you to sometimes know who you really are with the major mood swings? Is it hard to control your emotions when it comes to relationships? I'm curious to know.
Answers: What is it like to have bipolar disorder? Is it hard for you to sometimes know who you really are with the major mood swings? Is it hard to control your emotions when it comes to relationships? I'm curious to know.
Hmmm.. well, I always know who I am even with the mood episodes. I don't define myself as someone who is depressed or someone who is invincible/euphoric/etc., so my sense of self remains pretty stable. However, when I do something really "out there" or say something impulsively, I feel like I'm not myself. I feel like I can't control what I'm thinking, saying, or doing, as though my mood is just taking over. A lot of times I'll describe my manic behavior as "going off like a bullet from a gun." I often say and do things too quickly before I can really think about it, and even after it happens, I'm just like, "What the hell?! I can't believe I did that!" This gets really problematic. When I'm manic, I spend too much money.. and I mean waaaay too much money, money I don't have. I've even tapped into my parents' money when I ran out of my own to buy stupid crap at Walgreens at 2 o'clock in the morning. I won't go into the whole list of problematic/illegal things I've done while manic, just know the list is long and it really gets in the way of life. When I'm depressed, I almost feel debilitated. It's like I can't do anything but sit and stare or lay in bed. I cry a lot. I don't want to be around anyone, etc etc etc. It's frustrating because I KNOW I'm more social than that, I KNOW I'm capable of getting up and being productive, but it's like I can't shake myself out of it. It gets pretty frustrating.
I think my boyfriend has the hardest time dealing with the mania. I'm talking a mile a minute, spending all my money, getting angry (very angry) very quickly, going on power trips thinking I'm God (no joke), driving way too fast and swerving my car because it amuses me... all of that kind of thing, it makes the poor boy crazy. I say things so impulsively and I'm so unpredictable, he can't keep up and he takes it personally because that's how anyone would take it. When I'm depressed, at least I'm calm and he can talk to me and hug me. He's been really good trying to take it in stride, bless his heart, but the bipolar disorder has definitely put a huge strain on our relationship. It puts a huge strain on ALL of my relationships, but it hits my intimate relationship much harder because I'm with him more of the time. It's really hard for my family as well.
Hope that offers some insight.
my dad has it and so does my aunt its as difficult for me as it is for them as you have to tread on eggshells not knowing what kind of mood they are going to be in... or not say the wrong thing in case they go off on one x
One of my best friends was manic depressive. He enjoyed life, was a good husband, amazingly creative, a hard worker.
His wife knew he was bi-polar because one of their children inherited it. She nagged him until he saw a therapist. The doctor put him on mood levelers. He became incredibly depressed, quit going to work, just sat in front of his lifeless computer until he lost his job, had to sell his 3,000 sq ft house and move into a 1,000 sq ft condo. He quit painting and sculpting.
I've Had my moments of bi polar behavior but that was 55 years ago when I was in my teens. (more)
If you think you have it, go see a doctor. Otherwise, I am mildly bipolar and I get urges to go out and do something, it doesn't matter what it is, I just need to get out. I've learned how to control it though.
for me in means I have to be aware, I may be overreacting. I need to think things out before I react to other people or confront anyone.
I often wonder if I am in the right when there is a conflict. I tend to feel very wronged sometimes.