I think its time i ended it....?!
Question: okay so i hate to do this here but idk. i need to i guess. i just have been feeling so bad for a long time now. i cant put up with it anymore. its like no one really cares that i am here, so why should i be? i mean its not like i am of any value to this world so why bother when all i do is take up space. i dont like myself at all, and everything i do is wrong. im never good enough for anyone. one of my teachers noticed a change in my behavior this year and told the school psych about me. so then she called me down quite a few times to talk to her. i never said a word until recently. now i feel worse i should have never said anything to her because now i feel stupid. shes gunna find out that i am a cutter, then im going to be in even more trouble. i have no one to talk to ever, and i think ending it is my last resort. 2008 will be better off without me....
Answers: okay so i hate to do this here but idk. i need to i guess. i just have been feeling so bad for a long time now. i cant put up with it anymore. its like no one really cares that i am here, so why should i be? i mean its not like i am of any value to this world so why bother when all i do is take up space. i dont like myself at all, and everything i do is wrong. im never good enough for anyone. one of my teachers noticed a change in my behavior this year and told the school psych about me. so then she called me down quite a few times to talk to her. i never said a word until recently. now i feel worse i should have never said anything to her because now i feel stupid. shes gunna find out that i am a cutter, then im going to be in even more trouble. i have no one to talk to ever, and i think ending it is my last resort. 2008 will be better off without me....
please dont do that, please, listen, i dont even know you and i care, i care because i understand, so please, please hold on a little longer, i understand it hurtsm but dont give up yet, i would REALLY like to talk to you, can you please email me if you see this, i really wanna try to help.......just gimmie a chance and see, dont give up yet
I am sorry that you feel so bad. Please call 911 right now and get help. Don't feel bad about saying something. Telling people makes them aware and able to help you. You are not going to get in trouble for being a cutter. You can get through this.
You're wrong. You are a young person with lots and lots of potential--you are smart, I can tell by your grammar. You've just got to get this black cloud over your head to move along.
Talk to the school psych and ask her to help you find a psychiatrist, a dr who can give you medicine. My daughter started taking a pill every night when she was your age, and it helped tremendously. When she felt she didn't need it anymore, she didn't take it. And she was fine.
But for the psychiatrist to really know what you feel, you should tell her about your cutting. That's a specific illness that's treated with special meds. And you WILL feel better. Can you hang on for a few months, try a new dr. and medicine and see if they can't make you feel better? I can't tell you how many people would be devastated if you were to die. I'd be one of them.
TX Mom
Debbie
Things sound very difficult for you right now...but consider this,
Here I am, I care, and if you really think you have got the right mindset to determine your own life span you'd be mistaken.
Not sure what you feel you've failed at but perhaps a mind makeover is in order...instead of thinking your a failure, think
"I'm a success"...smile at yourself in mirror...instead of saying
"Im not worth it" say "I am worth it"...think seriously about talking to a therapist or someone trusted...they can help you learn to put things in perspective for yourself. You came out and posted your question, even if I am the only response you get...your worth that!!!!!!!! Just keep in mind talking to therapists at first feel aweful...they first need you to spill out all the garbage...and it hurts, I know, but then they work on that garbage...but its important to have a therapist you feel okay about being completely honest and open with. Whatever your faceing, is only that...you have your whole life ahead of you. Stick around and watch it get better dear friend. Take care!!!
Heart2Heart
Please don't kill yourself. Anything but that. Obviously your teacher cared enough about you that she told someone! Don't bottle these emotions inside, and do all you can to stop the cutting. I was once where you were, and heck, I'm still not completely recovered. But I used to be borderline suicidal and even attempted suicide by cutting my wrists. I cut a little bit on my shoulders, and on that terrible day for me when my sleeves were just a little bit too short, I was caught by two of my friend's mothers. I was so angry at them, but obviously they were concerned enough to tell the school counselor. Of course it got to my mother. She was calm about it, but it really upset her and I lost a lot of her trust. Cutting was one of the worst mistakes I ever made. I wish I could go back in time to stop myself to spare my mother that pain. Please tell someone. There are people who care about you, who love you and want you to live! God bless.
if noone cares about you effum. Thats one thing God gaves us the ability to love ourselves regardless of who and who dont love us. I really think the whole u not being around in 2008 is wrong and immoral to God. Today u might have a problem, but tommorow is a cure. I also felt that way during part of my life aswell but for diff reasons. But all n all the only one you will hurt is yourself be fair to yourself give your life as many chances as it takes cause once we go we dont come back. Think of all the people before who thought that. i bet they wish they could come back after they really see who cares about them afta they are gone. Please, i know i'm a stranger death is not the solution. what it is is the conclusion. I
please dont do that.even though it may feel that your just taking up space,its not true,no matter how badly you think it is.
life is hard,but you cant give up.if you dont think about yourself,atleast think about your family.it may be hard to understand sometimes,but they do love you.you need to know that your not worthless,and when you feel that way,just keep telling yourself that it has to get better.
and cutting yourself only hides the pain with more pain.the original pain will come back eventually,so why add more hurt then you need?
you can always talk to people.if you want,i'd be glad to give you my e-mail or anything,if you need someone.
your not alone.i'll be here if you want.
Cora, suicide is not an answer.
I currently work at a State Girls School. It is a Juvenile Detention Center for girls. Many of the girls here are also cutters. Your problem is not unique. Help, good help, is available. But for the help to work, you have to reach for it. Opening up to your school counselor is not going to get you into trouble. The Counselor knows it takes time for trust to build. You have reached that point because you are saying you do want to open up, but you are afraid to do so. That Counselor is hoping for that break through. So, make her day and open up. Save your life at the same time.
I have been suicidal, I know it hurts. Don't be embarassed. And definitely don't listen to those people who say it is just a call for help. All suicidal people should be taken seriously so tell someone, you are in a very dangerous situation. It is dangerous for yourself and the people who love you. You are not going to be in trouble for cutting. Again don't be ashamed. Your parents should know about this right away because I want you here so do the people who love you. I took 100 sleeping pills. Luckily I am still here because I told my father finally and he took me to the hospital. Don't wait this long, please?
You posting this is proof enough that you value your life enough not to end it. You want somebody to talk to, and I think the internet is a great place to look if you are too afraid to talk to someone in person. I am sure that talking to people in your life currently about suicide and depression would help reinforce that you really do have people that care about you, but I can understand your want to for anonymous help.
I used to have thoughts like this too, but i channeled those thoughts into positive things, and i can say now that i am so glad that i never ended it. If you feel insignificant, and think that your life would go unmissed if you ended it, try making an impact. Try helping people, volunteering? Start focusing on your future, what you want to do as a career. Think about how you can make an impact on someones life, think about how your existance could help make someone elses life better. What you don't realize is that you probally already have done just this. I had a friend who comitted suicide last year, but i dont think he realized how many lives he effected when he did this. People he didnt even know well cared, and you yourself need to realize that even though you may not feel it at times, people really do love you. Yes i realize that sounds so corny, but it is true.
Think about the people you would be hurting, would you rather them be angry that your cutting, or depressed because they feel its their fault they you killed yourself? Most likely they wont even be mad that your cutting, they will want to help you. What i did to help my depression was to find 1 friend that i could talk to anyone about. Hes my boyfriend now, but it has made both of us happier people. It is an online thing, but we both found it easier to talk to each other like this instead of with people in person. Maybe you can find some online friends to talk to your depression about, people you can relate to, instead of a psychologist?
Good luck, please dont do anything rash, your life is worth it and you will be happy when you channel all this negativity into something positive and really improve your life.
I have been in your shoes...even the cutting. Please, get help! You will never regret that you did. I actually have attempted suicide before. It only hurts the people that actually love you (yes, there are people that do care even if it doesn't seem that way). You won't get in trouble for your feelings or cutting. Best of luck sweetie!
please, please, please get some help from a live person tonight, if you are thinking about suicide please call the number referenced by the other people who wrote to you here.
you matter very much. it may not be completely clear how, or what your purpose is, quite yet, but this will come out in time. please trust this. and i am a stranger, and i care. so do the others that gave advice.
it WILL be ok if you can trust others to help you, and not be afraid to lean on them.
Honey, you have to tell someone. I know the pain you feel. I know that you don't think anyone could possibly hurt as much as you are hurting right now but I do know the pain of not wanting to live anymore. I would tell my parents. They LOVE you more than anyone ever could. Sit down and have a sincere heart to heart talk with them. I know how busy parents are now adays so if they don't take you seriously or get you the help that you deserve, tell your counselor at school.
I pray and hope that you stop hurting and get the help that you need. I love you and I believe in you.
hey, hang in there!
there is a great website called suicideforum.com! there you will meet like minded people with similar problems, people who actually know how you feel!
aite, look. im bipolar and i didnt tell anyone about my suicidal thoughts for about eight months. im not even kidding, tell someone. its really hard, but once you get therapy and meds, you should feel better. you can e-mail me. i would seriously like to talk to you. i know where youre coming from. i know what its like to feel so sad you can hardly breathe and it feels like theres a weight on you. just stick it out, and something to live for will come along. youre in a messed up state of mind. i felt like this six months ago, the first time i was admitted to a mental hospital. i felt exactly the same way. i know exactly how you feel. im totally serious. email me. i really wanna talk to you. tell someone. dont cut. i got expelled for cutting. it ruined my life, and now i have ugly sacrs that will probably never go away. my parents make me wear sleeves all the time because theyre emabarrassed of them. you dont want that. ever since i got help, i truly have made a difference in peoples lives. you need to find God. hes truly the answer. i wanna talk to you and i wanna help you. it will be easy for me to help you, because like i said, i know exactly how you feel. please email me, chick. i wanna help. i know you get this from people all the time, but i know what its like. im pretty sure i know how to help.