How can I stop getting so angry when my 2 year old sister has her tantrums?!
Question: I mean I really love my sister with all my heart and more but when she has her tantrums it really pisses me off.
She mostly has tantrums becasue we won't give her something eg. matches, cell/mobiles, lighters, fizzy drinks..
And she screams so loud and sometimes I just can't control myself and I scream at her to shut up and then she cries more which makes me feel more guilty...
One time I got really really angry I scratched her arm and then I saw the look on her face so I went to the kitchen and cut all my nails off and scratched meself with a knife...I felt so guilty...
I think I have a problem with temper but I never want to harm my sister again...but I need to know how I can cope with her tantrums and such because I don't want to shout at her and abuse her, I love her too much.
I am sure I will get loads of abuse from people saying I am a child abuser and stuff but I am not I really am not I just get too angry sometimes and I cannot control it sometimes I blackout
Answers: I mean I really love my sister with all my heart and more but when she has her tantrums it really pisses me off.
She mostly has tantrums becasue we won't give her something eg. matches, cell/mobiles, lighters, fizzy drinks..
And she screams so loud and sometimes I just can't control myself and I scream at her to shut up and then she cries more which makes me feel more guilty...
One time I got really really angry I scratched her arm and then I saw the look on her face so I went to the kitchen and cut all my nails off and scratched meself with a knife...I felt so guilty...
I think I have a problem with temper but I never want to harm my sister again...but I need to know how I can cope with her tantrums and such because I don't want to shout at her and abuse her, I love her too much.
I am sure I will get loads of abuse from people saying I am a child abuser and stuff but I am not I really am not I just get too angry sometimes and I cannot control it sometimes I blackout
Toddlers don't like to be told no, because at this age they are trying their hardest to be independent and all you are doing is trying to keep her safe. Simply say no calmly, I know it's hard when I child is screaming loudly and acting obnoxious, but you just have to tell yourself that they don't know any better. But you do. You know know how to behave and you realize that there is a problem with your behavior. When she sees you get upset and or hurt her she thinks it's ok for her to act the same way and it's not. Just calmly say no, remove her from temptation or remove temptation from her and find her something to play with that's safe and fun. If you say no, take her away from her desire that she can't have, give her a toy and walk away she will eventually learn that throwing a tantrum doesn't get her what she wants. If you respond to her tantrum you're just giving her attention that isn't needed. Walking away when she's having a tantrum or just simply going about your business around her without paying her mind at all can be very helpful. It worked well for my now 4 year old and he threw awful tantrums that involved kicking and hitting the floor. I just ignored him and he eventually gave up. Good luck. If none of these work, get yourself some parenting classes and or anger management classes. I don't know if you're the person taking care of her or not, but such classes can be a lot of help.
You are the adult (or the older one anyway) so you can't lose it! You have to stay calm and if not you can walk away, put some distance in between her and you.
i think you need to take time out, breathe, and think of things that make you happy to help calm down. just walk away from her
i also think you should seek some help for anger management, its clear you have something to deal with and its making you unhappy and a risk
good luck with this, for your own sake as well as those around you
Its simple hun - you just walk away. Toddlers have temper tantrums FACT - and the best way to make them worse is to acknowledge them!
have you tried using the distraction method??
when my children paddied, i either ignored them or just looked and smiled and waited. they soon stop. now both children are quite laid back. (on occasion my teenager has her own paddy, and teens are worse than toddlers. lol)
Try walking away, out of the room, as long as the child cannot do herself any harm then just leave her to it for a few minutes. If she continues to scream leave her a little longer. As soon as you show a reaction shes won anyway, so try and keep as cool as possible. Its hard but is the best for you. There are a of of people out there that probably feel guilty about something has happened through temper so try and keep control as much as possible. You are only human and if you cannot control it get some help. X Mark
sounds like you are quite young yourself (teenager am i right?) in which case you are having all sorts of hormones rushing round you affecting your temper and emotions, so don't worry. If it was not your sister it would be someone else pissing you off! I am concerned that you felt the need to self harm, this is self destructive and helps no-one. The best thing I would recommend is to just WALK AWAY. If your sister is having a tantrum, which two year olds do, make sure she is safe and just leave her to it. She will soon discover that there is no-one to impress and shut up! If you cannot do this, try to carry on with what you were doing, maybe turn your music up or the tv?
When my kids were like this, I would often strap them in their pushchair and go for a long walk. The fresh air and exercise would calm us both down. Sometimes i would just walk and walk, othertimes i would go to a friend or neighbour and the kids would instantly change their behaviour.
It's tough i know - why are you on your own with her? Do you have to babysit her often? Maybe have a friend with you next time who can take the pressure off?
Hope this helps.