When it comes to depression, is lack of sex drive a symptom?!
Question: My fiancee claims that the reason we rarely have sex anymore is because she is suffering from depression. I have no reason to doubt her since depression does run in her family. I've just always heard that if your significant other isn't "getting" it from you, they're "getting" it from someone else. We used to have sex 2 or 3 times a week. Now we have sex maybe once a month at best. This has been going on for the past 4 or 5 months. I'm always horny, I'm a guy, so that is to be expected. I take care of things myself, solo style. She said that not only does she not feel like sex, but she doesn't even masturbate. I know that most guys could not go without masturbating for more than a week, especially not months at a time. So my question: Can depression cause a female to not have sex drive?
Answers: My fiancee claims that the reason we rarely have sex anymore is because she is suffering from depression. I have no reason to doubt her since depression does run in her family. I've just always heard that if your significant other isn't "getting" it from you, they're "getting" it from someone else. We used to have sex 2 or 3 times a week. Now we have sex maybe once a month at best. This has been going on for the past 4 or 5 months. I'm always horny, I'm a guy, so that is to be expected. I take care of things myself, solo style. She said that not only does she not feel like sex, but she doesn't even masturbate. I know that most guys could not go without masturbating for more than a week, especially not months at a time. So my question: Can depression cause a female to not have sex drive?
As a sufferer of depression I can say yes a woman can lose sex drive.
Me & my partner used to have sex every day/night then when I started feeling down & my depression came back it seemed to vanish.
We Have sex about once every 2 weeks at the moment.
Lack of sex drive is a huge sysmptom of depression.
It's usually not just lack of sex drive, though. A whole bunch of other things too usually go with it.
Being withdrawn. Not being interested in other things that used to interest you, like hobbies, sports, activities....
Spending less and less time with friends and family....
Counseling can help... if she's willing.... and there is hope that you can be in a satisfying relationship again, but only she can take that step. Sometimes the person just can't do it (like my DH)
I hope it all works out for you.
It is one of the symtoms of depression yes.
Depression causes a lack of interest in all things once enjoyed. So if she is truly depressed, and doesn't enjoy the other things she used to, then it is probably due to the depression.
Otherwise.......
it depends. some depressed women turn to sex for comfort. some depressed women say, "what's the point?" and some women say they're depressed while they're banging your best friend from college.
I am confused because if you were to go by the current media and medical community. Men are the only ones who have low sex drive, women are supposed to want it all of the time. And since they supposidly are the only gender who can have multi O's (which of course is a lie) they are incapable of having a loss of sex drive. Also, women do not get depressed given that women have many friends and live in a society that lends itself to their every whim. How could they be depressed, every magazine, every tv show, everything is in their favor and giving them a boost on a daily basis. Then on top of that women own everything and make the majority of $$ these days.
Yes, depression can cause a shift in sex drive, but so can the medication that they put you on for depression. Also, you didn't mention the girls age, but a lack of hormones can cause this problem in women as well. She should have her hormone levels checked....
As for you, can I give you some advice? Hold her hand, tell her you love her. Treat her as you did when you were trying to "get her". Sometimes women feel bad about their bodies and theirselves and it makes it hard for us to want to have sex, but if you try to make it special and spontanious, you might just get it more than you are now. She is worring that you are getting it somewhere else as well, because of her condition. Show her some romance, send some flowers, show some love and support and you may just turn the tide...good luck...
Depression can lead to a load of symptoms and a lack of sex drive is definitely one of them. Depression presents itself in different ways.
The answer to this is: definitely.
One of the symptoms of depression is "lack of enjoyment in things you once found pleasurable", and sex is often one of those things.
I hope your fiancee manages to get help for her depression.
Yes, especially if she is on any medication. That is a side affect of most anti-depressants. I can relate because I too suffer from depression. I have pretty much lost all interest in sex and I don't masturbate. My husband is very understanding, even though it is frustrating sometimes for both of us. I know that I am never the one who initiates, but most of the time when my husband does, we do have sex. Try to be the aggressor. Yes, you may get turned down every once in a while, but you may find that this will work for the two of you. Keep supporting her and don't ever assume that she is "getting it somewhere else".
Good Luck!
well, it could but if she is not doing anything to solve the problem of the depression you may be down a lonely road to take care of yourself... Try to seek counseling or the doctor to find medication... One thing that really bugs me is that she is lying down and using it as an excuse for something that is bothering her.... I was depressed after my divorce but I wasn't going to take medication.. I fixed my problems and moved on.. Now I am better as a whole and not half..
Yes; one of the symptoms of depression can be reduced libido. Unfortunately, the antidepressants, which are often prescribed to treat it, may also cause sexual dysfunction. For that, and other reasons, I don't usually recommend them. My standard post follows: print/refer her: See depression treatments, at ezy-build *(below) in section 2, and consult a doctor, to eliminate thyroid problems, etc. as possible contributing factors: also seek a referral to a therapist using Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, or Rational Emotive Behavioural Therapy. It is your decision, and yours alone, as to whether to take any antidepressants offered, but, before you do, read section 1, and check medications out at www.drugs.com so you will be on the lookout for side effects, like sexual dysfunction. My strong recommendation, however, is to follow the advice of my doctor, his associate, and also Marcelle Pick, OB/GYN NP, and Dr. Mercola, as well, at http://www.mercola.com and avoid antidepressants (pages 2V, and 2Z refer, & antidepressant websites: page 2). The reasons why we all share the same view on this are explained in full, as you will find, if you read the whole section. All of their advice, (except prayer, because many people are not religious) I have incorporated into the "core treatments", including others as options, such as the supplements: Inositol, or SAMe, or herbal remedies, like St. John's wort. If you are diagnosed with clinical (major) depression, antidepressants may be necessary for a while, which will give the treatments time to become effective. The antidepressants themselves need at least several days, or even weeks to begin becoming effective. It's a good idea to taper off them slowly, with medical advice, after several months, say, to a couple of years, at most, because they are only effective in the long term for about 30% of people. Because of this, you would be well advised to begin the treatments immediately, and maintain them. I'd just thank your mental health care provider, and pocket the prescription, trying the treatments for a few months, to see if they are sufficient for you, before considering filling it (unless clinically depressed, and having great difficulty functioning, or suicidal, in which case I'd take them). If the amount of daylight you have been exposed to recently has reduced, perhaps due to the change of seasons, see Seasonal Affective Disorder (S.A.D.) in section 2, at * http://www.ezy-build.net.nz/~shaneris and, instead of taking 4 Omega 3 fish oil supplements, daily; replace 2 of them with cod liver oil supplements for the winter months only! (or, as probably a better alternative to the 2 cod liver oil supplements: 1 teaspoonful of cod liver oil, with a little butter, to ensure its use; I take mine on sourdough rye bread, or toast, covered with fishpaste, and pepper, to mask the strong taste). Consider having your doctor test your vitamin D levels.