What should I do? I'm not sure if I should go back to psychiatrist & medicat!
Question: I was under consultation and medication for 3-4 years until I met my boyfriend. During the time with him, I did without consultation/medication. Now away from him for 1 year, I feel I've a relapse of depression. I also feel soooo hard to live without him by my side, I would contact him more than what a normal person would. That drive him crazy.. and wanted to break off with me many times becos he cun take it, but still accepted me again in the end. I'm in a dilemma now because he is extremely disappointed & "disapproved" me to go back to doctor/medication. He feels that I should be able to do it since I did it before. But I see that our relationship will be ruined if I still continue to act the same...I tried many times, but still couldn't stop myself from behaving this way-contacting him unreasonably. What should I do?
Answers: I was under consultation and medication for 3-4 years until I met my boyfriend. During the time with him, I did without consultation/medication. Now away from him for 1 year, I feel I've a relapse of depression. I also feel soooo hard to live without him by my side, I would contact him more than what a normal person would. That drive him crazy.. and wanted to break off with me many times becos he cun take it, but still accepted me again in the end. I'm in a dilemma now because he is extremely disappointed & "disapproved" me to go back to doctor/medication. He feels that I should be able to do it since I did it before. But I see that our relationship will be ruined if I still continue to act the same...I tried many times, but still couldn't stop myself from behaving this way-contacting him unreasonably. What should I do?
Hi kangaroo (like the name)----well, to start with your boyfriend is wrong. I don't believe he means any harm but even the strongest of us needs help once in a while.
Yes it's true that when you were together you discontinued therapy for he was your support. Without that support, it is not unrealistic to feel the need for aid.
If you feel the need, take the help (privately if it suits the situation).
I wish you well.
If your boyfriend loves you he will be willing to stand by u. Depression is an Illnes it is a chemical imbalance of the brain. Consulute a DR not your boy toy
Wow - that's a hard one!
It's interesting that your boyfriend will accept you contacting him "more than a normal person would", but won't accept you seeking psychological help. Why does he disapprove?
I think that in order to work out how to address the problem it is important to work out why your boyfriend objects to you seeing a psych or taking meds.
Some of the typical reasons why people object the psychiatrists and antidepressants in such circumstances are:
* They have strongly held prejudices against anything even remotely to do with mental illness.
* They feel threatened by the relationship you will have with the therapist.
* They have suffered themselves, but have been able to pull themselves through it and so expect that everyone else should too. The trouble is they may not have had the same sort of anguish as you.
* Their prejudice against mental illness or even just psychological weakness is so strong that they don't want to be involved with anyone who seeks psychological help.
* They may feel that they give you support, so why do you need to get it from someone else. they may see this as not appreciating the help that they provide.
It may be that if you explain to him the benefits and that getting psychological help does not mean that you are weak, rather it means that you will be able to make yourself stronger. If this does not work you could also see if he would like to come along to a session with you to see if the therapist and he can work out ways that he can help.
If these approaches do not work, I think it is worth thinking about what your boyfriend's objections actually tell you about him and about your relationship. You might ask yourself questions like - Does he regard his prejudice as more important than your welfare, and more important than your relationship? Is he somehow dependent on you being so insecure? Does he value your opinions and feelings?
I grew up in a fairly dysfunctional family. My step-father would not allow my sister (his daughter) to get psychological help. It seems to me that this indicated he was more concerned about himself than about her. She now hates him - a result that may have been averted if she had got help and he had assisted. I am worried that your boyfriend's response could be similar.
I know I have not actually come up with a solution for you. I don't think that there is an easy solution. Maybe he would accept a counselor more easily than he would a psychiatrist. However, the decision is yours!
Good luck!!!
you need to take care of yourself... That comes first and foremost. Your boyfriend needs to support you , but if he can't then he is not worth it.
You shouldn't go back to the medication.
www.cchr.org
specifically, http://www.cchr.org/index/5166/19396/