Same Sex Molestation Victim?!
Question: I have been abuse by the same sex. Is it normal to be sexually confused in a way. I want to have a great relationship with a guy so bad, but I feel that my experience will make me gay in some way. (no offense) I don't want to be gay either. I am constantly comparing myself with other girls and its annoying. i am on a brith control and every since then, I have been an emotional wreck. If a girl is understanding to me or wants to just be my friend it freaks me out.I question myself like I don want to be her gf, I dont like her like that, and is she trying to hurt me. When I like a boy which takes me a long time with trust ( I was sexually harrassed and abuse by a guy that I liked) to take the relationship further. I hope that this makes sense I need help. My homophoia drives me insane. I dont want this experience to make me gay and I dont want to hate gay people. I was even holding hands with a guy recently and i got that love feeling with him and it felt sooooooooo good. What up w/ me?
Answers: I have been abuse by the same sex. Is it normal to be sexually confused in a way. I want to have a great relationship with a guy so bad, but I feel that my experience will make me gay in some way. (no offense) I don't want to be gay either. I am constantly comparing myself with other girls and its annoying. i am on a brith control and every since then, I have been an emotional wreck. If a girl is understanding to me or wants to just be my friend it freaks me out.I question myself like I don want to be her gf, I dont like her like that, and is she trying to hurt me. When I like a boy which takes me a long time with trust ( I was sexually harrassed and abuse by a guy that I liked) to take the relationship further. I hope that this makes sense I need help. My homophoia drives me insane. I dont want this experience to make me gay and I dont want to hate gay people. I was even holding hands with a guy recently and i got that love feeling with him and it felt sooooooooo good. What up w/ me?
You should talk to a psychiatrist beleive it or not I know what you are feeling somewhat I had a friend in the past that was in a foster home a growing up and the foster parents both of them over and over again sexually harrassed and abused Tina and she confided in me and I got her help and away from these people because she was sexually confused and confused and sptriped of her own morals and sexual identity,she did not know which way to turn, she was 14-17yrs old during those years,it took her 7 years before she could learn to trust anyone,she felt like everyone was out to hurt her and she could not handle anymore hurt, she told me that she was on the verge of suicide until one day me and her was talking and went to one of the local parks and started walking a path and others walked it,she conquered part of her fear of being around others and some of the hurt that she had experienced in the past, one day along that path she met a guy that was an elementary teacher during that time and thought she was a beauty queen and got to slowly talking to her and knowing her and they fell in love and married 3 years after that day,now her husband is a correctional guard and she is a beautician because she likes the feeling of helping others feel good about themselves,she also has a baby girl named Faith and she is so precious.so good luck you will find your way like she did,it will always hurt but dont let that person take control of yourself and your body your smarter than that,figure out what you want out of life and go for it dont let the past slow you down, set your goals and go after them and go for your dreams. some dreams can actually come true if you dig deep enough in your heart to find the courage and strength. Good-Luck my friend. Learn to take what was taken from you-learn to love and be happy with the person that you feel the most comfortable with.
I think u still carry a lot of pain. It's normal to not feel okay around the same sex when that has happened 2 u. Maybe you should talk 2 someone. Not every girl or guy is going 2 attack you. Just take it one step at a time.
I suggest you talk to a counselor or therapist in your area. You still have feelings you need to get out.
Try calling these hotlines for help to:
1-800-656-HOPE
1-800-THERAPIST (1-800-843-7274)
National Teen Dating Abuse Help
1-866-331-9474
Stop It Now! (Sexual Abuse)
1-888-PREVENT
I think what you're feeling is normal - it sounds like you've been traumatized, and you need to seek therapy to address that trauma. you need to learn to analyze what your're feeling: you'll learn to recognize thoughts and actions that arise from fear, and those that are more positive. once you can understand what you're feeling better, you can starting trusting others. i'm not going to tell you to try to be more trusting of others, because some people aren't trustworthy, and sometimes we want to trust people who are not good people. but you shouldn't push genuinely thoughtful people away, either. find a good therapist. if you don't like the first one, keep looking. are you in high school? the school counselor can help you seek treatment. best wishes to you.