Why do you wear that phony smile all the time when you actually feel quite miser!


Question: Please elaborate, and note that this question does not apply to me. I am one of those people whose expressions are an honest reflection of what's going on in my head.


Answers: Please elaborate, and note that this question does not apply to me. I am one of those people whose expressions are an honest reflection of what's going on in my head.

Ever heard the term "Fake it till you make it"?
If you are one of those people who are secure enough in yourself to not be worried by what your facial expression projects then good for you. But it's been proven beyond reasonable doubt due to studies on depressed people that making a concious effort to smile can actually make them happier. We can cheer ourselves up by manipulating our facial expressions. How exactly can you tell whether the people you see are genuinely happy or not? Can you read their minds? Don't act like your better than everyone else because you are "honest". Cheer up and smile back, it won't cost you anything.

That is what our society expects. It is just a habit for most people with good manners, it is subconscious. In a way, it is a reflection of how we feel. When you are in public you tend to be happier when you encounter others.

Because the alternative would only make you feel worse!

My "phony" smile is the only way I can get others to believe I'm OK, even when I'm literally dying inside. My emotions and mental issues don't ever get thrown upon a table for discussion. That's a way of control for me. Trust me, if I could I'd be telling the world just how I really feel, but being slightly claustrophobic I couldn't handle a jail cell either... It's my way of avoiding having to talk about what's going on with me and my little brain, cause if I talk, I'll show emotion which leads to being vulnerable and that's not what I want to be.. vulnerable, my emotions are mine. So, when you see me smile, just smile back.

I would say it is so a person does not get adverse reactions, it avoids confrontation and actually breeds better response from people and may in turn even change the way you feel. So, it is not really being phony but just getting on with the day.

In my case I usually try to look like I am happy and OK to stop people worrying about me. I don't like to upset people and it is often easier to play along and act like you are fine to avoid doing so.

I do this less now than when I was younger. Now I try not to put on this 'happy front' if I am around the people who I know and trust. They will eventually see through it anyway and I've found it is much better to be honest with them about how I am feeling. I don't want every person who walks by me in the street to know how I feel however. Only those who I know and trust get to see what's really going on with me. I suppose that also makes it partly a self defense thing, I don't like people to see when I am upset or struggling. Like someone else said, it has to be with being and feeling vulnerable. When I can smile and convince people I am fine then that mask lets me feel 'safe'.

Not sure if this is the sort of answer you wanted/expected but I hope you find it helpful.

Yes but I've been told that my smile looks phoney because my eyes can't lie.

i do it to please society. no-one wants to know that really i feel like killing myself. they all expect me to be happy. so i have to appear happy.





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