Differences in personality after a person is raped/ molested?!
Question: My friend was molested and she has always been boy crazy, will she now be different b/c she was molested. How will someone who was molested or raped act differently in the following situations as they did before:
A hug from a guy friend
A boy asking them out
Boys teasing them
Seeing something about rape/ molestation on TV or hearing people talk about it
Hearing someone else close to them was raped/ molested
Also is there a difference in feelings between someone who was raped and someone who was molested?
I'm just wondering, thanks
Answers: My friend was molested and she has always been boy crazy, will she now be different b/c she was molested. How will someone who was molested or raped act differently in the following situations as they did before:
A hug from a guy friend
A boy asking them out
Boys teasing them
Seeing something about rape/ molestation on TV or hearing people talk about it
Hearing someone else close to them was raped/ molested
Also is there a difference in feelings between someone who was raped and someone who was molested?
I'm just wondering, thanks
Yes her personality probably will change, she has just been through a very traumatic experience and is going to be going through a lot of different feelings and thoughts. Everyone will deal with these differently.
From a personal experience when I was first molested I changed, I became withdrawn from my family and friends. The first time I was raped I changed again I didn't know how to deal with the feelings I was having and couldn't cope with them so I turned everything into anger. When something came on tv about abuse or rape I would get embarrassed thinking everyone was looking at me.You can go through many different stages when you are trying to deal with what has happened to you. Sometimes I couldn't stand any male to be near me, I would push them away and not want them to touch me or even talk to me, then I went through a stage where I thought might as well let them do whatever they want to me as there going to anyway. Not a healthy road to go down and now something I regret very much but at the time the frame of mind I was in it's what I felt was best.
Yes you do feel differently between being molested and being raped but both of them are as bad as each other and should not happen to anyone. I am really sorry to hear about your friend and I wish her all the best. She's lucky she has someone like you that cares all you can do for her just now is stay strong for her and let her go through the different stages, let her know you are there to listen to her and support her in whatever she wants to do. good luck my thoughts are with you and your friend
a good friend that she can talk to and don't go behind her back talking about her some one to that will listen to her not telling her what she should have done ,,, the hurt is there now ...[ loose lips can sink ships]
This may seem odd but you what you describe is quite common. One's experience is altered when they suffer a trauma. This trauma may have either occured to the person directly or it can be second hand. A good example of Post traumatic stress disorder as a result of hearing or see a trauma take place is 9/11. In the hours and days following 9/11 the media repeatedly showed the video of the crashes... unfortunately repeated viewing of the event has caused some to experience PTSD. Also sometimes parents and or siblings will experience PTSD as a result of abuse that happened to another family member. Usually when one has PTSD they have an intensified respond and reaction. This may or may not be conscious... I'd urge you to seek help for yourself and your friend. you can either check online/phone book for support groups/hotlines and also make an appointment with a therapist or your primary care doctor who can assist you in finding the help you/or your friend needs.
Best of Luck -- things do get better.