My best friend is a "cutter"?!
Question: I don't know how to help her anymore. She has been cutting for 4years. She told me last year because she needed someone to talk to. I have been there for her helping her stop. I thought she stopped. I found out a few days ago that she is still cutting. I love her so much. I'm closer to her then my own sister. I just wish I could take all her pain away. She used to be fat and kids at school would call her pig. Those kids were really harsh to her. She has never been able to move on from it. She is so pretty but still thinks she is trash. What can I do? We both are 18.
Answers: I don't know how to help her anymore. She has been cutting for 4years. She told me last year because she needed someone to talk to. I have been there for her helping her stop. I thought she stopped. I found out a few days ago that she is still cutting. I love her so much. I'm closer to her then my own sister. I just wish I could take all her pain away. She used to be fat and kids at school would call her pig. Those kids were really harsh to her. She has never been able to move on from it. She is so pretty but still thinks she is trash. What can I do? We both are 18.
She deserved it for being fat.
Tell her to just stop being an attention-seeking who.re and stop doing it--it's that simple to stop, it doesn't require 'loving friends and family' or any bullsh.it like that to stop self-harm, just tell them to stop being an attention-seeking idiot. Trust me, first hand experience, it's very effective.
talk to her parents immediately, i know shell probably be really mad at you but if you honestly love her you would tell them.
Wow. some people do that. mostly girls. guys turn into serial killers and girls cut. she needs therapy.
tell someone, do her parents seem stable, or tell a school counselor.
Tell her you started. That may scare her out of it.
let her do what she want and stop getting in her way...
if you go to a college tel your conseler anomysly or confront her outright it she loves you the ways you love her she will understand.
a bf can help. as long as he's super proactive in getting her to stop. or maybe even u. tell her everytime she cuts u will refuse to talk/see her for a certain amount of days. It could make things pretty messed up at first but if she cares to see u/whoever she'll have to stop. it worked for me, my gf used to cut.
p.s supposedly it's an addiction
Same issue here, except my freind is 23 and has been cutting ever since she was 12.
The only thing you can do is offer her emotional suuport.
You cand help somneone who doesnt want it.
Never turn your back on her
You have to really want to be commited to helping her if you cant handle her problmes then dont offer it...trust me on this!
Visits lots of sites and learn all you can on cutting itself. If you understabd why she does it you can help her more. Maybe go to a group with her. Talk to her about tricks...like drawling red ink lines on her skin (if she needs to see blood) or snapping a rubber band on her wrist (if she needs to feel pain) also she can take it out on hobbies like art work.
well for one; just listen to her like you have been. maybe give her a journal? that way she can write how she feels instead of cutting. that helps a lot of people, if its really bad you should maybe tell someone, she wont like it at the time but she will thank you later, when shes older and has a family shes really going to regret doing it, the sooner she stops the better.
she needs to see a therapist. it's hard to break a cutting habit..believe me ive been there. i used to do it in my sleep and not even know, i don't know why. no one really has a expenation of why they. she may deny wanting to get help, but i suggest you talk to her and get her the help she needs.
once she stops she will look at the scars and feel regret...i did that same thing. then you just have to watch her because she may feel the need to do it agian whenever she feels pain.
pain is something you can really control, it's just there...believe me...if we could just take all out pain away everything would be so much better in life. I guess the reason she cuts is because she feels that its the only pain she can actually control...thats how i felt.
I hope i helped, and i hope everything goes well for your friend.
xoxo Jayden
Honestly, the best thing you can do is get her counseling. After that, all you can do is make sure she stays healthy physically. When she tells you about a cut, ask her if she needs medical attention. Stay on her about keeping her cuts clean and bandaged. She is really ingrained into this habit and needs more help emotionally than you can provide.
so you can't tell her parents... hmmm... this is tough! someone close to her... maybe possibly an adult needs to know about this. one of my close friends in highschool did this. i told her mother and he mother didn't wanna believe it. the next week my friend made a cut deeper than ever and her mother found her lying lifeless in her room. she was rushed to the hospital and given blood. the cuts WILL get deeper and she might be mad at you for telling someone, but it might save her life! she is reaching out for help. good luck!
life....love...it is all pain. but the thing is being postive and greatful for living. explain this to ur friend. let her know how u feel about her and explain to her that every1 is pretty in the own way.
Life is only about moving forward...looking in the bright side.. and loving ur self. As a friend ur shouldnt be just a friend, but a older sister or mother...make sure u tell her u care about her alot...and it kills u when she hurts herself.
If her family isn't the greatest people to tell, then that leaves it all to you. You're saying you guys are like.sisters. go away for a weekend together away from everyone and all things that make her nervous. Once she is calm, tell her that if she continues to cut herself, one day she will die from it if something goes wrong and no one is there to help her, things can get even worse.
Tell her to keep a diary and take up a hobby to do whenever she gets that urge to cut.
You're a great friend even if you can't help her, so don't put it all on your shoulders to save her world. Just do what you can and the rest is up to her.
Hello,
Sorry to hear this!
Now that she is 18 there is not to much you can do but try and get her into counseling. This is not only a mental health problem but a dug problem as well, a real hard addiction.
Maybe if you would go with her to a professional it would not be so hard for her to go? Of course you can not make her but she really does need help.
If she was under 18 her parents could make her go to a hospital, but sometimes that does no good either....
To bad this is so popular these days and people hate themselves this much.
You are a good friend, just be there for her.
Good luck.
I totally understand. I used to cut my self too and I think Im fat as well. My bff was in trhe same situation as me. We stopped eariler this year because we realized we were better than that. I took on Dance and I cant have the scars on my arms when Im in My leotard. My bff started soft ball and she lost weight from doing it. We both feel better about ourselves now and were able to stop. Tell her to take on a hobby and maby you should do what ever she wants to start with her. Make sure you tell her how good at it she is and always make nice commenbts about her apperance. I hope I helped
u shud like introduce her 2 Jesus
She needs help ASAP. I knew a girl just like this and tried to kill herself. Please beg her to get help.
See site below and tell her to see it. It has advice for teen girls and cutters. Tells about meeting around the country for cutters. Also increases self-esteem.
It sounds like you are facing a major decision: which is more important to you , your friendship or your friend's life? She will not be happy about it, but her parents need to be made aware of how serious things are. If the friendship survives, that's wonderful, but if it meant saving her, you might have to let it go. At some time in the future, she will forgive you, but today has to be dealt with first. You've been a good friend to her, but this is more than you can handle alone. Reach out for help for both of you.
You friend needs professional help. She is silently screaming for it, though she will undoubtedly plead for you not to say anything to anybody. This is a no win situation for you. She is being very self centered. Does she care at all about how this affects you? Probably not.
You want to do the right thing and be the better friend and person? Stage an intervention! You need to have your ducks in a row right before you have this talk because there will be a crisis. She will not just go see a therapist like a rational human being. She isn't being rational.
She might need to be hospitalized. When you have this talk with her you need to have tricked her into a confined space with the people who can help. Then you can tell her how you could not in good conscience keep her self mutilation secret anymore. It was not helping her in any way shape or form. If you just tell her you want her to see a therapist without staging a real intervention with a professional then expect a meltdown complete with another cutting incident.
Another thing, look out for yourself. Get some emotional distance between you and your friend or she is going to drag you down with her. Don't you have enough problems of your own? Sure, I'm all for loyalty and being a good friend. There is nothing more valuable than a good friendship, but you have to consider your own well being. Good relationships require two people doing equally for each other.
lol