Another question on emotional abuse?!


Question: Thanks to everyone who answered my questions before! Here's another one:

Is it possible for the person who gives the abuse out not realise what they are doing?
And what if a person is just really sensitive so the arguements and comments they receive from their partner makes them feel worthless and lose confidence- would this class as emotional abuse or is it only when a person does in intentionally?


Answers: Thanks to everyone who answered my questions before! Here's another one:

Is it possible for the person who gives the abuse out not realise what they are doing?
And what if a person is just really sensitive so the arguements and comments they receive from their partner makes them feel worthless and lose confidence- would this class as emotional abuse or is it only when a person does in intentionally?

I experienced emotional abuse and blackmale from my father, it makes me really angry just to think about it.

I dont think my father realised what he was doing was wrong (he used to threaten me by saying he would take things away from me if I saw my mum- after they divorced and they got joint custody and we lived with him)

I dont find that makes me feel better though.

When I talk to him or ask him why he did it he cannot see that it was wrong. Its been over 10 years now and I dont think he will ever see the error of his ways. I think he was/is just simply very selfish, he didnt want me to have a relationship with my mother as he had a control issue and though he would be in control if I saw my mum (which was probably right as I wanted badly to live with my mum and to be able to talk to her about all the girly stuff like periods and guys and stuff). I hate him for effectively stealing these years from me- I had to stay at home and watch tv, while my sister was able to see my mum. I also had to lie to my mum and tell her I had homework when I didnt, I was just scared of my dads reaction.

I think it is possible that someone can carry on regardless and I do think its still abuse. Its still wrong and still unfair.

Its like saying all the murderers who have thier DNA seamen and finger prints all over the rape/murder victim is not guilty if they dont admit it. This is wy we have the law, and emotional law does exist as well.

I was a child of emotional abuse and a wife. My low self esteem was because of this. I often heard I was too sensitive. I was not ! I was always being emotionally abused and the abuser is usually very careful to let this side of them not be seen by others. It is usually saved for when you are behind closed doors, just like any other form of abuse. So the answer to your question is YES it is still abuse !

No, anytime someone feels abused then they are. For example, I may call u stupid and not think anything of it, you may secretly feel hurt and bothered by my comment. I therefor would be emotionally abusing you. A rule of thumb is if you are not comfortable with a situation then it is probably not right. Do accept anything that you are not comfortable with.

Most people who are emotionally abusive know what they are doing , and keep that aspect hidden from others , who think they are really nice . The person who is abused suffers a lot.

putting someone down is always done to hurt .and the person doing it know this ,so yes it is abuse.

i said some nasty thing to people when i was younger. but i never realizes it was nasty untill they mentioned it 10 years after. if i knew then the emotional damage i was doing i would not of done it. People keep there feeling hidden and are told to ignore people who are verbally abusing them. So how do you know when you are really hurting people because they are to busy pretending it does not bother them.

Sometimes if two people are in a mutualy 'dependant' relationship, they may both use emotional blackmail against each other. They may not realise that they are doing it; it's a type of point scoring thing really. For example: mutually dependant relationships often have a lot of jealousy involved, so they would perhaps constantly accuse each other of being unfaithful and say hurtful things. I think anything that upsets you and makes you feel worthless is not good and if the other person cannot see how their behaviour is affecting you, then this must surely be emotional abuse. Just a thought. Hope this helps. x





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