What can i do for my APD?!
Question: Avoidant Personality Disorder has kept me from meeting new people and being friendly to people who actully want to talk to me. i get extremely nervous talking to new people alone or with just one other friend that knows him/her. last time i tried to talk to someone new was in the beginning of the summer and i was so nervous and scared that i couldnt stop my hands from shaking and i had the worst migrane ever afterwards.
there are some happy, easy going, fun to talk to people that i dont feel too nervous around but thats only a certain few .
i also have the worst time with social rejection (ie- a break-up or someone telling me im annoying) i can become the "emo-anti-social girl" for months if the rejection is bad. i just want to be better with people so if their are any suggestions on how to get over this or make it weaker i would greatly appreachite it.
thank you all
---bri---
Answers: Avoidant Personality Disorder has kept me from meeting new people and being friendly to people who actully want to talk to me. i get extremely nervous talking to new people alone or with just one other friend that knows him/her. last time i tried to talk to someone new was in the beginning of the summer and i was so nervous and scared that i couldnt stop my hands from shaking and i had the worst migrane ever afterwards.
there are some happy, easy going, fun to talk to people that i dont feel too nervous around but thats only a certain few .
i also have the worst time with social rejection (ie- a break-up or someone telling me im annoying) i can become the "emo-anti-social girl" for months if the rejection is bad. i just want to be better with people so if their are any suggestions on how to get over this or make it weaker i would greatly appreachite it.
thank you all
---bri---
Hi Bri,
You show symptomatology that could be linked to a few different disorders, so I would be cautious to say you have avoidant personality disorder. To really assess this would require a comprehensive diagnostic assessment and there are several empirically tested and validated measures that could support a proper diagnosis. None of which you will find on the Internet as those tests are protected under copyright law, cost money, and generally require a skilled psychometrist, psychologist, or psychiatrist to evaluate.
However, if you follow the teachings of Karen Horney (pronounced horn-eye, not horn-ee) who believes that people have the ability within themselves to correct their own psychological problems, then perhaps you can do things to help yourself. On the other hand, if you feel overwhelmed and unsure of what to do, a skilled therapist or psychologist may be of value.
If you really do have "APD," I would imagine a combination of insight based interventions mixed with cognitive restructuring would be the most effective approach. Assuming you where to see someone, you might be able to just deal with the cognitive issues, as a true "CBT" therapist believes you don't really need to know where dysfunction comes from in other to resolve issues surrounding it. Anyway, you need to first figure out where your behavior comes from. I can only take blind shots in the dark on this, but it seems logical that fear of others judgments or reactions plays a part in this. The question is, why? It would also be reasonable to assume that you where somehow judged very harshly when you were younger and the results of those judgments were not good. It is also reasonable to assume that based on this, you found that, at the time, withdrawing and isolating yourself allowed you to cope with the disappointment/anger/sadness/frustration... etc in a way that protected your ego. The result of you today is that you are now super-ego dominant (looking at it from a psychoanalytic perspective) and you have become your own worst enemy in that you judge yourself more harshly than anyone else would and the reaction to your own distorted judgments is to fall back on the only defense you know of to deal with this...which is withdrawal and isolation. Again, this is all speculation based on what you said and may be completely inaccurate. I would really need to sit with you for a few sessions and I can think of a few tests that might shed some light on this.
However, based on your own honest investigation to gain insight into yourself, you would then need to map out the cognitive processes you go through when confronted with a social or interpersonal situation that makes you feel like retreating into your shell and try to find alternative ways to view it and more realistic ways of viewing it. This can take some work because, obviously, you think your own initial thoughts on some situation are right otherwise you wouldn't think them, right? So generally this would be where a therapist could really help with more objective views on your thought processes.
Anyway, I hope this helps you in some way.
Bri,
Are you self-diagnosing, or have you seen a mental health professional who diagnosed you with APD? Are you currently seeking counseling? I really think that would be best... much better than the advice we can give you here.
There is some evidence that APD may decrease with moderate antidepressant use. Cognitive therapy may also work. Many times it decreases with age.
councelling