Your average moody teen, or something worse?!
Question: I've had issues with self-esteem since the 7th grade. My
self-esteem was so bad that it led to cutting. Thankfully
i stopped in the 8th grade and havent been cutting ever
since.
I- about once every month- get hit with this huge mood
swing, where for about a day maybe even two i feel like
complete and utter sh*t, its usually triggered by the whole
never having had a bf thing, i deal with it though.
I hadnt experienced a mood swing like that though in about three months and yesterday boom, it hit me. It was accompanied by new feelings this time though: I feel drained, ive given up on finding a guy, life seems like a
horribly boring even slighly meaningless thing to me... every day it just feels like im just going through the motions, and
guilt with food and gaining weight.
Well it's probably nothing serious, but if you think otherwise do
tell, and whatre some ways i can cope with these feelings?
Answers: I've had issues with self-esteem since the 7th grade. My
self-esteem was so bad that it led to cutting. Thankfully
i stopped in the 8th grade and havent been cutting ever
since.
I- about once every month- get hit with this huge mood
swing, where for about a day maybe even two i feel like
complete and utter sh*t, its usually triggered by the whole
never having had a bf thing, i deal with it though.
I hadnt experienced a mood swing like that though in about three months and yesterday boom, it hit me. It was accompanied by new feelings this time though: I feel drained, ive given up on finding a guy, life seems like a
horribly boring even slighly meaningless thing to me... every day it just feels like im just going through the motions, and
guilt with food and gaining weight.
Well it's probably nothing serious, but if you think otherwise do
tell, and whatre some ways i can cope with these feelings?
While it's nearly impossible to imagine, this time of your life is not as important as it seems (as far as love and emotions are concerned). You aren't going to find the love of your life at this stage (or I hope not...I can't imagine being married to any of my high school boyfriends - what a mistake that would have been!) I kind of think of everything that is going on at your age as practice for the real thing. You have raging hormones that can cause mood swings from one end of the spectrum to the other. So some days, you are going to feel much crappier than on other days.
I have struggled with my weight all my life and know all about guilt with food. I'm finally taking control of that aspect and instead of feeling bad...I joined weight watchers. It's teaching me how to eat properly and for the right reasons...and that I can "have my cake...and eat it, too"...but in reasonable portions and planned out in advance. I don't feel guilty about indulging now and than because my plan allows for it. This is an option for you as well and it can help with your self esteem. While they won't just let a teenager join, you can get a doctor to give you a note that says it's okay. This might be something that could truly benefit you and you are young enough that it could really help to learn this stuff now before the bad eating habits become deeply ingrained.
As far as coping...I think you need to find some confidence boosters. Don't let having a boyfriend be the thing that makes you feel better about yourself. If you do that, it will start a bad pattern in your life. You should never need someone to make you feel better about who you are. Focus on the qualities you have that make you special...whether you are great at writing or art...or math and science. A good sense of humor...or a sensitive side, which maybe makes you a good listener and helper. Everyone has something to offer and I'm certain you are not the exception.
And keep this in mind. These years will come and they will go. But when you get out into the real world, it's not going to be nearly as cut throat as what you are dealing with now. This is an especially rough time in a person's life...dealing with cruel, insensitive and vain teenagers is not going to follow you into your adult life. Even the pretty and thin teenagers are having a much harder time than you imagine. I wouldn't go back to those years for anything. Now I get to be me and people like me for that and don't expect me to be perfect. That is something for you to look forward to...so don't let this time of your life get you down. There is so much more life has to offer...and especially as far as men are concerned. Don't let not having a boyfriend right now ruin your confidence...you are so young anyway and there are so many things ahead.
you might have depression. the best thing to do is to call your doctor, only they can tell you for sure, and give you the best options to get help.
:)
Sounds like being a moody teen. I have bipolar disorder, and this doesn't seem anywhere near what I suffer. I get this crap when I am not going through a mood episode. When I was a teen (I am 23) I'd get upset about my self image, esp. because I didn't have a boyfriend. Now, I am engaged and really I realized that boys in high school DON'T MATTER even though that seems like the world. You have plenty of years ahead of you for boys. You need to put things into perspective. Eating is not the answer, and if you feel like you are going through the motions you need to change things in your life. Volunteer at a soup kitchen or something else. Or, if you don't want to do that, get a hobby. There are plenty of things you can do out there to take control of your life and make it what you want. Life isn't handed to you, even though for some reason in high school it seems as if it is. I know, the popular girls seemed to get everything, but that goes away. I promise.
Being both a woman and a teacher who sees lots of moody teens every day of my life, I tend to think this can become serious if it is not taken care of. I think your problem is related to hormones, since it happens on a sort-of monthly cycle. You need to go to the dr and get checked, and if the dr thinks there is nothing physically worng, you should go to a counselor. Try to get a specialist in hormonal issues or the endocrine system, sice some GP's tend to blow off the kinds of symptoms you are describing. It is never normal to think life is meaningless. Take my advice!
I have the same problems, except I am currently cutting =/
It's a way to deal, you know?
Anyways, I have had a BF, but a shitty one. Sorry, but he did only harm. And I eat from guilt, so I'm becoming worse, and I have a low self esteem also.
So, I know how you feel.
My way of coping is not the best, but another idea is to write in a journal, and talk on the phone with your best friend.
I talk for hours, and it just helps me completely.
Join some sports, I love tennis. And spend time with your family, [unless they cause you problems]
Ohh & listening to music helps so much. I just love it.
Get by day to day girly.!
Xox, good luck!
I'm not a doctor, nor am a psychologist by profession. Furthermore, I don't know you, so I can only offer general advice based on my experience with teenagers.
1) Your mood swings are probably due to hormones. It's natural. But if you are worried, I would check with a doctor to rule out any medical issues. If there are no medical issues, then you can start controlling the effects of the hormones so that you don't fall apart. To do that, you have to make sure that you are eating a balanced meal, each and every time. Breakfast consisting of a little protein, whole grain cereal or bread and milk is crucial as it keeps your blood sugar level up until lunch. When your blood sugar level goes down, you get irritable and listless.
Lunch should again be nutritious but low in calories. Stick to non fatty meats like turkey, fish and chicken. If you eat a sandwich, make sure the bread is whole grain. You also need a fresh fruit and salad for fiber. You should drink milk and water instead of sodas. Sodas contain too much sugar and other chemicals that play havoc with your hormones.
After school snacks should consist of fruits and vegetables, only. No cookies, cakes or other junk foods.
Dinner should be equally balanced and low in fats. Oriental style dinners with fish, rice and lots of vegetables are probably the best.
Nutrition is very important in your teen years as it affects your emotional, mental and physical development.
2) Your concerns at this point should focus on getting good grades in school and preparing for your future. Whatever you want to do, be it doctor, lawyer, artist or businessperson, you need proper preparation. Many girls seem to think having a boyfriend is the end all and be all of existence. It's not. There's plenty of time for it later. Focus now on your long term goals and on doing something nice for others, for example by volunteering at the hospital or the animal shelter. You know there are a lot of people who could use your help. When you see their grateful smile, you'll feel a lot better about yourself too.