I am actually now worried about my fiance's soon to be sister in law's m!
Question: I had issues with her harassing me for the last few months. She had made outrageous threats and statements (she hoped I miscarried; she thought my son was retarded; she thought I was faking a pregnancy), it got out of hand for a while but it stopped when I called the police. My fiance HAS been supportive through this. My concern is she has a preschooler who she maintains joint custody with her ex. She is drunk (enough to not remember her actions the next morning) every single night, whether her child is with her or not. Her fiance (my fiance's brother) is the same. She keeps calling my fiance and saying she thinks she is pregnant (6 times last month) which he told her she should discuss with her fiance, not with him. It recently came to light (her mother is close with my soon to be MIL) that she had a hysterectomy a few years ago so pregnancy is NOT possible for her. She is at this moment planning baby showers.. In this light I feel bad for calling the cops, obviously she is ill.
Answers: I had issues with her harassing me for the last few months. She had made outrageous threats and statements (she hoped I miscarried; she thought my son was retarded; she thought I was faking a pregnancy), it got out of hand for a while but it stopped when I called the police. My fiance HAS been supportive through this. My concern is she has a preschooler who she maintains joint custody with her ex. She is drunk (enough to not remember her actions the next morning) every single night, whether her child is with her or not. Her fiance (my fiance's brother) is the same. She keeps calling my fiance and saying she thinks she is pregnant (6 times last month) which he told her she should discuss with her fiance, not with him. It recently came to light (her mother is close with my soon to be MIL) that she had a hysterectomy a few years ago so pregnancy is NOT possible for her. She is at this moment planning baby showers.. In this light I feel bad for calling the cops, obviously she is ill.
Call CPS, you can do it anonimously. Tell them all you know. those kids or kid does not need to be in that situation. She is probably a drunk because she is a wack job. My sister in law is a mental freak and I can see my story in yours. I had her kids for 9 months before she finally decided to get sober enough to get back custody. I am the devil you know trying to reuin her life. However her kids love me to pieces, the oldest one stayed with me! after the younger two went back with her she left the country with them to avoid the state taking over her life with surprise visits and cheecking to make sure all was still good. I fear for my life at times when it comes to her. Mental illness un medicated and intensified by drugs or alcohol scares me more than anything in this world.
Best of luck! Get those kids away from her until she is medicated and stable!
call CPS
This poor woman needs some help.. I understand the reluctance to become involved but you need to do what you can to protect the child. This mom is apparently unable to care for herself, much less her child.. She should be reported to the Social Services Agency for your county. Usually this can be handled with confidentiality--bring that up when you call. I applaud you for being concerned for this poor child, because apparently no one else is...
When you know she and her fiance have been drinking and the child is with them you should call the police. Tell them that you are worried about the child's well being. They can then call CPS if they feel it is necessary.
When something, or someone ,bothers you, your the one with the problem. Try not to focus on her. Think about yourself.
What do you need to do to look after you and your son only.
Your common welfare comes first. Focus on your son's best interest.
Keep an open mind. Don't allow her to manipulate you, for attention. Don't give her an audience, that is what she is looking for. Her shame and guilt is eating her up.
Stay to your own business. Block her phone number.
March.10.2008.
Try to have as little contact with her as possible, when you or you partner talk to her make the conversation as short as possible and say things like, " I can't help you there, I don't know what to tell you."
I am totally blown away by the comment that you should stay out of it, that "you" are the one with the problem.
You are AWARE of someones serious instability, which can harm the child, which psychologically, is probably already happening. THIS is what cps is for... not for meddling busy bodies who exaggerate, but for real danger situations to children. The indication (to me) is that there is likely mental illness, which is covered up by drinking. I say mental illness, if there is real evidence of delusions.
This is not said, out of hate or anything. The majority of persons who harm children through mental illness, are (I am convinced), those who fall through the cracks because no one recognizes how bad it is, and they don't get help.
If she is court ordered to get help, it may be a blessing to her. She will not think so at first. At least, the right persons/agency will be alert, and investigating before the child is hurt.