Why is it that people with bipolar have no chance...?!
Question: I was recently diagnosed as being bipolar 1 a couple weeks ago and am now taking mood stabalizers, which is helping me with all the manic phases I was going through. I was lashing out on my husband both emotionally and physically.. ( he has scars on his face from where ive scratched him) The anger really just took over. Bipolar is real, for all those disbelievers out there. Anyway, the medication is helping.. my question is this: is anyone out there bipolar too and having a difficult time when it comes to you and your spouse having a difference of opinion of some sort, and your spouse immediately stops listening, and says condescending things like.. "your opinion doesnt matter, your bipolar".. "your just over-reacting." "this is just another little episode." It is so frusterating. it seems now that I have this diagnosis, he just uses it as an excuse not to have to communicate. How do I get him to stop? Hes driving me more crazy than I already am.. j/k. But seriously.. how does a person
Answers: I was recently diagnosed as being bipolar 1 a couple weeks ago and am now taking mood stabalizers, which is helping me with all the manic phases I was going through. I was lashing out on my husband both emotionally and physically.. ( he has scars on his face from where ive scratched him) The anger really just took over. Bipolar is real, for all those disbelievers out there. Anyway, the medication is helping.. my question is this: is anyone out there bipolar too and having a difficult time when it comes to you and your spouse having a difference of opinion of some sort, and your spouse immediately stops listening, and says condescending things like.. "your opinion doesnt matter, your bipolar".. "your just over-reacting." "this is just another little episode." It is so frusterating. it seems now that I have this diagnosis, he just uses it as an excuse not to have to communicate. How do I get him to stop? Hes driving me more crazy than I already am.. j/k. But seriously.. how does a person
First off, I don't know what you're on...but meds for bipolar disorder doesn't trigger mania. Antidepressants do that though.
Second, people with bipolar disorder have a chance at everything. Hell, at 17 with three years of this crap....I'm living proof we have a chance.
I've had an amazing girl by my side for the last two years, sure we've had bad fights(verbal) but...I know no matter what she's the person I can count on....your husband sounds like he deosnt take the time to learn about BP, so he deserves the scratches for discriminating against you.
Get a divorce, there's always people who just don't care about a person with BP. Either they leave them because they found out the person is bipolar or they think were not capable of doing anything.
You need a husband that cares.
He's obviously the one that triggers it,
Not medication.
So just...separate with him.
Until you get better because
All he is doing is makig it worse.
Take some yoga or karate classes.
Itl help ya a lot.
Good luck
Marriage counseling.
i think its best that you talk to him about this cause he is adding to your aggreviation. tell him how it makes you feel.
Wow, hun, I'm so sorry. Your husband sounds very dismissive. No matter what, your opinions, thoughts and feelings COUNT, regardless if you have taken medication or have Bipolar disorder.
I don't give a crap what your disoder is, to be dismissed so blatenly sends a message that you simply don't count. Your feelings, thoughts aren't valid... this is total crap.
Listen, when I have PMS, I tell my husband, even if I feel this strongly during PMS where I might not if I wasn't, it doesn't mean my experience having those feelings or thoughts or opinions is less valid!!!! Even if I feel differently the next day, my feelings and thoughts today are valid simply because I am experiencing them.
I think that your husband needs a new strategy with listening and communication and arguing with you.
Using your disorder as a means to invalidate you or as a tool to use in an arguement is completely unfair.
You both should set some boundaries around what is an acceptable way to fight or disagree. If you can't do that on your own, then marriage counseling.
take him with you the next time you see your pdoc,so he can see yes you have a few problems but you can still think and make decissions and alll the rest like talk and listen. you know what i mean i hope this helps.
Wow, your husband sounds obnoxious. The best thing you can do is educate him. Bipolar is something you have, not all that you are. You need to keep an open line of communication and tell him how he's making you feel. If he's not willing to work at understanding your illness and where you're coming from he could just be the wrong guy. Bipolar can be tough to deal with, but there are people out there willing to make the effort to understand and accept it, not write you off because of it. I'm sorry you have to deal with someone to condescending. I hope it works out for you.
I really wish I could answer this question.
I have had Dr's in my past say I -may- be bipolar, but never had any certain diagnosis of the condition.
But I do know how the anger does get out of control, wether I -officially- do have BPD or not.
With my spouse, it's always an episode every day and we rarely go a day without fighting. I know it's because I just blow up about little things. I know most of the time he's trying to be nice, but I take it the wrong way...but can't stop myself from flying off the handle.
My best solution for the situation has always been to remove myself from it, by locking myself in another room away from him untill I've calmed down enough to talk. That often takes hours...but he calls it childish and immature. I see it as a better solution than duking it out right then and there without thinking.
I'd say to him (before, during or after the anger) "Just leave me alone untill I'm calm, then we can talk." and every time you feel like yelling and screaming, just keep taking yourself away to calm down. It doesnt always work, especially if your spouse is the type who wants to 'deal with the issue now'.
I hope someone else can answer this question for you better than I can.
If you tell anyone your bi polar they can and will use it against you anytime they feel threatened. I am not bi polar but i do know that it takes an understanding and caring person to deal with bi polar. I could never date a bi polar guy unless i loved him. He will continue to use things against you. I guess you can seek counseling for your relationship if you want it to work. Good luck
Being bipolar doesn't mean one is retarded. Your husband is just using it as a excuse. You are still able to use you judgment and act on it. To me it sounds like the typical excuse of a husband who just do not want to deal with any type of issues. It sounds to me like the husband who tells his wife she is crazy for she thinks he is having an affair, and typically, he IS having the affair.
It is just a vicious circle. He is also probably worn out having to deal with your condition. I mean, let's be honest, how do you think he feels walking around with scratches on his face?
Probably the two of you are at a point that you are just too tired of each other. Counseling would be a good idea. Also, you should try to go together to the psychologist appointment.
I think it's important to educate our loved ones about the disorder. People fear the unknown and this is unknown territory to your husband. I'm not making excuses for him by any means. I had problems with my husband when I was first diagnosed. I bought him a few books, showed him a few websites, and today he went with me for the first time to see my dr. I've been diagnosed as BP1 for about 4 years now, and it does take time to make them understand. Even now, he sometimes will stop and say, "You're being b****y, did you take your meds today?" And yeah, it pisses me off. But, we talk about it and move on. You need to be open with each other about this. He needs to understand where you're coming from, but you also need to understand that this is new to him and he's going through this in his own way. Good luck!