People have suggested therapy, but I'm scared and unsure it's necessary?!
Question: Okay, so basically, I've had problems in my past (from my childhood - I'm 19 now) that I've never really gotten over, and they have recently had this tendency to come out when I've been drinking. Otherwise I'm pretty good at hiding the fact that I dwell on the past pretty much all the time. I managed to get pretty drunk (unintentionally) in front of a few friends, and basically burst into tears and started blurting out my insecurities etc. Since, three seperate people have suggested speaking to a therapist. The thing is, the thought terrifies me. Apart from anything else, there are people who have gone through much worse than me who are actually deserving of therapy. What if I'm really just selfish in focussing on my insecurities all the time? What if he/she thinks I'm some kind of freak? I guess I'm just looking for a little advice as to whether or not I should speak to someone, as my friends suggest.
Thanks in advance!
Answers: Okay, so basically, I've had problems in my past (from my childhood - I'm 19 now) that I've never really gotten over, and they have recently had this tendency to come out when I've been drinking. Otherwise I'm pretty good at hiding the fact that I dwell on the past pretty much all the time. I managed to get pretty drunk (unintentionally) in front of a few friends, and basically burst into tears and started blurting out my insecurities etc. Since, three seperate people have suggested speaking to a therapist. The thing is, the thought terrifies me. Apart from anything else, there are people who have gone through much worse than me who are actually deserving of therapy. What if I'm really just selfish in focussing on my insecurities all the time? What if he/she thinks I'm some kind of freak? I guess I'm just looking for a little advice as to whether or not I should speak to someone, as my friends suggest.
Thanks in advance!
I think your friends are right about therapy. I have had a very hard childhood, that was very painful. And their are things that trigger the past from time to time. Its something that to this day at age 44 it still hurts.
I have seen a psychiatrist. And he is wonderful. Kind and non-judgmental. He has really helped me to deal with the past.
And how to handle things when something triggers bad memories. At first it is hard, because you feel funny at first telling a stranger your past. I have cried in therapy, got angry, all kinds of emotions. Getting drunk(unintentionally) is the way you are subconsciously dealing with your emotions.
If you need someone to talk with more. Please email me.
I will be glad to talk with you.
You should start therapy. It helps to have someone to talk to and it may help you to get over these things.
Yes, you should find someone to talk to and see if you can find someone with at least 7+ years of experince. That way you can be pretty sure that they've dealt with a lot of different issues and will be able to help you deal with yours. Good therapist don't think that their patients are freaks they know that they are there because they have problems. A person who's a therapist is someone who has a wish and a vocation to help people. They are also trained to help people with their problems. Talking to someone who can help you will do you a world of good and help relieve some of the stress that you're under. Hiding things doesn't work sooner or later the emotions will demand that they be dealt with and one way that you might start to deal with them is by drinking more and more, that will only make the situation worse not better. Get some help it will make a great difference to your life.
Go talk to someone. You're not being selfish if you need to learn how to release issues from your past. Why not overcome the insecurities and move on instead of keeping them inside you?
No one will think you're a freak because you're not. Besides, therapists usually have to intern in mental hospitals so they've seen much worse than you.
Chrissy..of course it's not selfish to speak to someone. Dear, you are not a machine. What a well trained therapist will do is give you "Cognitive Therapy" techniques to help you deal positively with past hurts and relationships that hurt, how to deal effectively with relationships going forward and so on. Every person should be taught these techniques. They really do work and will help you now and in your future. You will feel more in control of your life, and not so much a victim of your past and emotions. And one of the great things is you can teach others what you have learned and your kids too. So this is like learning any good subject that will prepare you for the future. A third to a half of the people in the US will learn Cognitive Therapy in their lifetime to help themselves and to help others. Take care of yourself dear and speak to a learned therapist.
Okay, I'm going to be perfectly honest with you. You should go see a therapist. You need to be able to talk to someone, without being drunk. I've always said there is someone going through something a lot worse. However if you don't care of yourself how are you ever going to help someone else. A therapist has heard and seen a lot more than you'd think. I've been through several. Life is not always the greatest thing. Some have it easier than others. But you are still important. Go see someone. It will help. Maybe if you're interested, get involved with a church. But either way, you have good friends if they're telling you to do this. God bless. And if you ever need someone to talk to, you can email me anytime. Believe me, there is nothing I have not seen or heard or have not gone through myself. Hope you don't put good adive to waste.
You sound so much like myself, it's scary. Yeah worse things may have happened to other people, but that does nothing to help your situation or make things easier on you. If you need to talk to someone that's a personal decision. No one should fault you for it. I will say be selective in who you chose for a therapist. And remember you don't have to take EVERY suggestion they give you. I've been to some great therapists and I've been to some awful ones. And if you decide not to go to a therapist, that's your right too. It won't do you any good to go unless you feel at least somewhat comfortable with it.
Trying therapy is not always the first step. Try consulting your family and friends, letting them know some of your insecurities. You need to build a support system, whether it is through education, religion, family and friends, work, that way you can know that you have more than one place to turn to in a time of crisis. If you know that alcohol does have the adverse effect of unintentionally making you talk about your insecurities, then you should steer clear. So, try talking to someone that you know that you can trust, and someone that you know will listen. Sometimes just talking things out is the best cure. As a professional, I can tell you that many people just need to be heard, and that is the majority of what therapy accomplishes. If you do find that you aren't working through some of your insecurities in the means above, then by all means that is when you would try speaking to a professional.
I can guarantee that no therapist will look at you as a freak for what you tell him..You need to get into therapy & start working through all this. I think gettting off drinking & onto medication could be crucial for you.. You said yourself you have leftover junk from childhood--take advantage of this time to deal with it..This is possible--hard, but possible, & I can promise it won't get easier if you put it off..