My 42 year old unemployed cousin needs help?!
Question: My cousin is 42. She dropped out of school at age 16, went to another state to live with an aunt who doesn't know what discipline is. She turned into an alcoholic and addict by mid 20's (Meth,coke). She has never held a job for more than a year. She's 42 and living in my parents house now because her parents finally gave up on her. I know it's bad, but this woman only asks for money and never does anything to better herself. She's a long way from being normal. She's not able to live on her own. She definitely has issues, when confronted on her lifestyle she says she's depressed and doesn't want to find a job. She has no positive outlook in life. We tried to get her to go into treatment but she won't because she doesn't think she belongs with homeless people in rehab.
She is splitting apart my parents, because it's my dad's house and my mom's niece. My dad moved out because he said this isn't his responsibitly. She has been living there for 4 months now. What should we do?
Answers: My cousin is 42. She dropped out of school at age 16, went to another state to live with an aunt who doesn't know what discipline is. She turned into an alcoholic and addict by mid 20's (Meth,coke). She has never held a job for more than a year. She's 42 and living in my parents house now because her parents finally gave up on her. I know it's bad, but this woman only asks for money and never does anything to better herself. She's a long way from being normal. She's not able to live on her own. She definitely has issues, when confronted on her lifestyle she says she's depressed and doesn't want to find a job. She has no positive outlook in life. We tried to get her to go into treatment but she won't because she doesn't think she belongs with homeless people in rehab.
She is splitting apart my parents, because it's my dad's house and my mom's niece. My dad moved out because he said this isn't his responsibitly. She has been living there for 4 months now. What should we do?
Give her a good kick in the a** and make her get a job ... don't let her freeload .
No one can walk over you unless you lie down and let them.
Tell her no rehab ,no place to live ... and never give a junkie money!!!
If you take away her options she will either get help or lose a place to live ..
The people around her make her behavior possible .. STOP!!
Mom is an enabler!
Well, she clearly needs treatment. Her problems might not totally be her fault, but only she can take action to fix them. If she refuses treatment, there's not much the rest of you can do... or should do. The ball's in her court.
Your mom needs to force the issue -- go into therapy/rehab or move out. As long as your mom is helping her get into rehab, nobody can complain that she's not being supportive. Letting the cousin stay in the house is enabling her lifestyle.
You can't save someone who doesn't want to be saved. Sit her to the curb and tell Dad to come home.
Until she HAS to figure it out for herself she won't!
In the long run she'll like herself better for having to pull herself up...