Really need to seek help.?!
Question: im thirteen and i have an okay life but my temper is horrible.
I loose it like crazy over nothing, iv made my mom cry. I MADE MY DAD CRY- in all 13 years have i never seen him cry. I dont even know what i say i jsut say crap. The stupidest things make me mad too. And its not like when im pms'ing[well thats worse] but its all the time. I need help, im tired of being mean and rude to my family and friends. This is really making me depressed for some reason. thanks in advance sooooo much. =] =] =] =]
Answers: im thirteen and i have an okay life but my temper is horrible.
I loose it like crazy over nothing, iv made my mom cry. I MADE MY DAD CRY- in all 13 years have i never seen him cry. I dont even know what i say i jsut say crap. The stupidest things make me mad too. And its not like when im pms'ing[well thats worse] but its all the time. I need help, im tired of being mean and rude to my family and friends. This is really making me depressed for some reason. thanks in advance sooooo much. =] =] =] =]
Hi there,
You've taken the first step in accepting responsibility for your own actions.
Talk to your mom and dad. Let them know exactly what you just said here. Ask them to make an appointment for you with a counseling center or clinic.
Kids your age these days seem to have so much more pressure on you all than what we had when I was a kid growing up.
Please take the time to talk to them. There is nothing to be embarrassed about by seeking some professional help. These people are trained in helping kids get to the source of the real issues and help them to move forward in life.
In regards to pms'ing, etc. While you're 13, you're not too young to start birth control pills. Whether you are aware of this or not, birth control pills can actually reduce the pms symptoms of irritability, pain, mood swings, etc. considerably.
Please take time to ask your mom and dad for help so that you can help yourself further.
In the meantime, think about giving your parents an apology as well and tell them why your apologizing with reasons... not just saying I'm sorry. This will mean more to them than you know.
Hang in there Sweetie.... you can get through this with flying colors.
Hugs and have a good night sleep.
Anger management is addressed in section 4, at http://www.ezy-build.net.nz/~shaneris If you can't deal with it by using one of the techniques, such as counting backwards from 20, to 1, (and prevent yourself from making yourself angry, in the first place) is important to express that anger appropriately, at the time, and to the person who caused it, if possible, or immediately afterwards, if not, maybe by walking away later, and bellowing your rage. In some situations, such as work, or school, it might be better to cover your mouth with a cupped hand, bandanna/handkerchief, or use the crook of your elbow, to muffle the sound. Some people find that it helps to journal those thoughts, and emotions soon afterwards. Anger, which is repressed, rather than healthily expressed, tends to fester, and later may cause explosive fits of rage, or depression. It helps to have someone you can talk to. For more physically inclined people, a punching bag, or hitting your pillow, can be an effective release mechanism: visualise, as vividly as you can, that you are striking back at the cause of that anger. ~~~ From Y!A: "But next time, when you get mad, just remember this quote: 'Those who anger you, conquer you.' It's basically saying that when you give someone the power to make you mad, or let it get to you, it's like they're controlling you. When I realized that, it made me mad, so I try to control my anger and not let people see it. You can still control your anger without being walked all over. You just have to draw a line."
girl i know what you are goin though.
i make my mom cry too!
well, if you need a shoulder to cry on you know you got mine and MAggies!
im sure ur parents are more than willing to take u to a psych. u could have icd (impulse control disorder) or a type of depression that throws u into raging fits. im no doc, so u definately need to see one! teens usually revolt against parents anyway, but if u have no self control, ask ur parents to set u up and appointment! asap!
i don't know about in your case, but sometimes people are mean because it has become a bad habit. and i also think people are mean to see what kind of a reaction they get. how did you feel when your parents cried. did you get a little satisfaction that you upset them so badly. you must have if you continue to do it. i would just be devastated if i made my mom cry. you at least recognize you have a problem and that is good. but you are the only that can stop it. and guess what that is the clue. stop it. you will be amazed how much better you will feel about yourself when you start acting like a decent human being. and i will tell you another thing, when you begin to treat other people that way and you will because it will become your personality if you don't stop it soon, they will not keep popping back for more like parents. they will tell you to go jump off a clliff and who knows some of them may just be a little bit meaner than you and just give you a little shove off the cliff. you are on a path that will lead you to go nowhere but down. when you get out in the world, as in working, people will chew you up and spit you out because you cannot be that way with bosses and co workers or you will be selling pencils on a corner because you can't get along and people can't stand to be around you. it just sounds to me like you may be in need of a little growing up. i bet you like to be treated like you are growing up and mature. so now act that way. not trying to be mean, but i think you needed to hear the truth. be nice because life will kick your butt and if you are mean, life and a bunch of other people will kick it even harder. you are setting yourself up for a hard life if you don't learn how to treat people.
you need to find out if this is an emotional anger or if youre just being mean. is this your personality or did it just start happening? there are many disorders that include anger as one of their symptoms. do some research so that you can try to pin point whats wrong and then ask your parents if you can seek professional help. seeing a therapist or psychiatrist doesnt automatically make you crazy. it means you are actively seeking help.
you are very young
when i was your age.i was like you
Don't worry. i think you need some times.
Remember that "your parents love you for ever ,they wish you can have a bright future"
you should understand your parents mind
compared to you,they have more experience of life.
trust them.
i believe that when you have child, when you thirty years old.
you must not make your parents cry..
because then you fully understand .
If anger is your first response than you need to find out why.
A)
Normally anger is a defense mechanism that indicates you may feel threatened and that is why you are getting angry. You need to stop MINIMIZING.
Minimizing is to make something that has taken place, less than it really is or pretend it may be less harmful, or less important etc....
a)
First you need to look at the event from all sides without taking sides ( understanding your reasons and other people's
reasons for dealing with a situation in a particular way is key to your success in this case, you have to be fearlessly truthful
about everything when you are GATHERING INFORMATION ABOUT).
b)
Then you have to evaluate what you have found out about yours and other peoples reasons and the way they handled themselves.( sometimes our reasons are good but the way we handle the situation needs adjustment).
c)
you have to come to a dicision about it and have a course of action.
d)
After all is done you have to look at the WHOLE THING again and find out how far it was from being the best decision.
Remember to ask God for help for all your decisions and thoughts and actions everyday and all the time.