What's the best way to deal with a teenage daughter with bi-polar disorder?!
Question: Unfortunatly, she has been handed down this problem from her mother. Her mother and I have divorced several years ago because of the lies, money problems and infidelity that unfortunately were associated with her disorder. I know this has put a lot of stress on my daughter, but she has been diagnosed with the same thing. I love my daughter very, very much and I want to get her all the help she needs. I've had her to phsyciatrists and she has been put on medicines, which do seem to help some, but it still seems like an uphill battle. I don't think her condition is nearly as bad as her mother's, but she defineatly has trouble telling the truth...usually about things that she has no reason to lie about at all. Most of the time, if she just told the truth, there wouldn't even be any problems. Any advice?
Answers: Unfortunatly, she has been handed down this problem from her mother. Her mother and I have divorced several years ago because of the lies, money problems and infidelity that unfortunately were associated with her disorder. I know this has put a lot of stress on my daughter, but she has been diagnosed with the same thing. I love my daughter very, very much and I want to get her all the help she needs. I've had her to phsyciatrists and she has been put on medicines, which do seem to help some, but it still seems like an uphill battle. I don't think her condition is nearly as bad as her mother's, but she defineatly has trouble telling the truth...usually about things that she has no reason to lie about at all. Most of the time, if she just told the truth, there wouldn't even be any problems. Any advice?
Just let her know you love her, as i can tell you do.
She's lucky to have a father like you..
when my dad found out i was diagnosed with bipolar at the age of 9, he left me.. and i havent heard from him since.
im stuck in a foster home now..
and id do anything for a second chance...
i wish i could appoligize to him for being this way, but i cant control it...
and neither can your daughter.
if i had my daddy back, i would want him to understand i flip out sometimes, and sometimes i dont know what im doing, i just wish he would understand, and love me..
thats all she needs... love.
one word: DEPAKOTE
Lots of patience, and keep letting her know you love her.
give her space
marry her off to the first meathead that comes along. That's what my wife's parents did.
Edit: I've been with my wife for seven years, and every day is a new struggle.
tell her the truth is best reward her when she tells the truth disapline when not
i feel your pain. The area im in is chocked full of bi polar women. does she spend alot of time with her mother? the women i date seem to do alot beter when they keep on their medicine. Not all of them are on the same thing, by process of elimination, they eventually found the ones that worked the best for them, other then that, i dont know of any advice to give you.
as long as you know that its the truth than i dont think you have any reason to be upset and i feel so sorry for her as long as you know what is what just keep her on the medicine
( P.S. everyone hates medicine i am a.d.d. and i HATE medicine so just dont make her take it 24/7)
There are different symptoms of this mental illness. Just work with your doctors and get her a ssi check every month for her. This is a roller coaster ride indeed!!! My mom has bi-polar and scizo and among others.
Well, hmm... I'm wondering if the lying is really a part of the bipolar disorder, and maybe if her meds need tweaking.
Of course, I'm not a doctor, but I have been diagnosed with bipolar which I effectively manage with therapy and medications. I have my ups and downs, but those in combinations REALLY help, and I think I'm as 'normal' as anyone else nowadyas.
Anyway, perhaps you yourself could make an appointment with a psychologist (not psychiatrist, who usually just prescribe the medicines), and talk to them about what you should do. S/he might also want to talk to your daughter later, but anyway about it might be very good at helping you decide what to do.
Dealing with different problems like this can be difficult, but very doable (and makes everyone happier!), so good luck!
Treatment Options
The first medical breakthrough in treating bipolar disorder came in the 1950s. Today, there are many medicines and other ways to manage bipolar disorder. People with bipolar disorder hold jobs, raise families, and live full lives.
Treatment for bipolar disorder can vary. What works for one person may not work for someone else. That's why it's very important to work with your healthcare provider to find a treatment, or a combination of treatments, that works for you.
There are 3 basic parts of treatment for bipolar disorder. They are medicine, therapy, and learning more about the condition so you can take care of yourself.
Learn about the different Medicines to treat bipolar symptoms.
Find out how Therapy can help.
Things you can do to help can be found in Self-Care.
Studies to help find better ways to treat bipolar disorder are discussed in Clinical Trials.
For advice on getting help from an expert, read the Talking with Your Healthcare Provider section.
therapy:
Therapy
"I have difficulty forming new relationships with people, whether romantic or just friendships. Because there's always the question of, when do you tell somebody, or if you tell somebody about this - and worries that I may do something inappropriate, or say something inappropriate, and not have it be understood."
-- Leslie
Read more comments from people with bipolar disorder
Talk therapy is also called psychotherapy. Talk therapy means talking with a professional about yourself, your situation, and your health. It can help you learn how to make sense of your thoughts and feelings.
Talk therapy is not about getting all the answers or advice. It is a way to learn more about yourself. It can help you get information, support, and honest feedback. This is done within a safe and private setting.
There are different types of talk therapy sessions.
Some are one-on-one, with just you and a counselor.
Others are in group settings.
Some types provide education and support.
Others focus on learning about yourself or your relationships with others.
Talk therapy can be an important part of controlling symptoms. It can help you regain confidence in yourself and reduce the strain that bipolar disorder can put on relationships.
check out more info at:
http://www.bipolar.com/treatment_options...
it was very helpful for this question...
Hey im 14 year old girl and I also have been diagnosed with bi-polar. Yes it is hard but if the lies are the only problem or the main problem you are having trouble with simply talk to her. Talk to her seiously about lying is not good and if you have nothing to hide there is nothing to lie about then. Maybe for you the medications is making her seem better but do you really think that she feels better with the medication? I know I had to stop the medication because all it made me do was not feel myself and act like everything BUT myself. Dont forget all because they have bi-polar dosent mean they are brain dead. They need to figure out a way to deal with it and hopefully the love from of father could actually cure her. My parents were exstreamly loving towards me and fortunetly I dont suffer from it not as much as urusall. The only problems I have is my mood swings but nothing serious. I hope eveyrthing comes out well =D
It is important to learn as much as possible about your daughter's mood disorder and get support for her and your self. You do not have to go this alone. NAMI (National Alliance for the Mentally Ill) has a lot of information and a website that are very informative and helpful. Also try this one: http://www.revolutionhealth.org
There are listings of various health topics and support groups online which is great since it is so flexible.
I sincerely hope that your daughter is in counseling. There is a reason for the way people behave and a therapist will help her understand her behavior and provide support to help her change.
I speak from experience. Do not forget to get the support you need; that is very important to your well being and that of your daughter's.
Best wishes.
Keep up with the psychiatrist and meds. I have a daughter with the same problem. Although she has been diagnosed as having Oppositional Defiance Disorder (ODD) as well. This is called co morbidity.
I have found that the consistency found in therapy helps tremendously. Finding the right medicine for your daughter may seem like a crap shoot at times and it may feel as though it will never get better, but it will. You already have the dedication. Believe it or not that is half the battle.
Consistency, consistency, consistency. It is more important than most people realize.
Good luck. I wish you nothing but the best.
are there support groups in your area? For you? perhaps you can go to a support group for caregivers of people with manic-depression (bi-polar) disorder. I think if you are there, with other parents, spouses, siblings, etc. you can get some comfort, some advice and from people who are walking the same road with you. just a thought. good luck to both you and your daughter.
tell her if u want to get ride of this you are going to come clean with everything you are feeling, then is the only way i can really help you
Okay, I went through this phase when I was young. I lied to my parents, I lied to everyone around me, I lied to myself. I'm not sure what she's lying about, you need to be more specific about the type of things she's lying about. I think it's a defense mechanism. I lied because I couldn't deal with the truth, having bipolar disorder is a scary thing and it's hard to accept. You just want to be normal. You can't be normal, though. You can live a normal life, but you can never be normal. The sooner you accept that the better off you're going to be and you can start being honest.
One thing, that drives me crazy about normal people(and actually most bipolar people) is how little they do to understand this disorder. There are books out there on how to deal with this. There are all kinds of websites by people with bipolar disorder. In fact, there's a pretty busy message board where you might actually be able to get advice from genuine bipolar people and other people who live with them on how to deal with your daughter:
http://dbsa.invisionzone.com/
One thing you'll find about bipolar people is they tend to follow a lot of the same patterns, just read some of the posts on that forum. There are a ton of others who were just like your daughter.
Basically, my advice is research. If you understand this disorder better you will be much more comfortable talking to your daughter and she may finally open up to you. This is why mentally ill people talk so much in support groups and therapy, because they can actually be understood. Always remember, your daughter is sick, you have to treat her appropriately and you have to be understanding. She can't help the way she is, you have to forgive her for that.
my daughter is about the same ... i have been considering buying a small farm in the most remote area of the Nebraska wilderness so as to keep a teenage pregnancy from developing behind my back ... which seems quite likely in the future, the way things are going .....
if there is no wood ... there is no fire ... right? Take away the boys .. the parties ... the beer ... the drugs .. and all the peer pressure .... and suddenly you have peace.
I am actually being pretty facetious and trying to inject some humor here ....... but I am half serious .... and totally fed-up.
we have to work and cannot physically sit and watch them 24 / 7 .. right? Unless you are retired already, which is unlikely.
lies ... lies .. lies ... I AM SICK OF LIES.
Did you know that in the country of Vietnam this behavior is not permitted? This problem does not exist there, generally speaking. Did you know that? Seriously. I have looked into this extensively and my conclusions are:
If one of their kids lies, they get spanked ... and hard. Every single time. Period.
Secondly, there are virtually no preservatives or food colorings in their food there ... everything is fresh and unprocessed. There is NO sugar, salt, margarine in their diets. NONE. There is no dairy food in their diet to speak of. (thus no injected beef hormones, either) ..... no fat bodies ... no behavior issues .. very little cancer or heart disease.
I strongly suspect that the thousands of chemicals that are in our food here every day have an effect on us and this is one way we see it ..... in our kids ..... ADHD .. etc.
In the backwoods of the Ozark Mountains, if your kid lies to you, you go out in the back yard and cut a small, light very green little branch (if you could call it that) from a tree and you lightly use it on the back of the legs of the offending child. Try it on your self first. It takes very small effort ... and yields great, memorable results. Otherwise known as "cutting a switch" .... I hear this offers great behavior modification in children. They still do this in that part of the country ....... bet ya they have more guts than we do ... and far more practical wisdom.
Most Americans these days seem to hate that method ... yet are mystified about behavior problems of their wayward children ........
Cutting a switch works. The same approach is used all over Vietnam ... and it should be no surprise that problems with teens there is basically unheard of. (they think we are stupid in the way we raise out kids, by the way)
if your blood pressure is going through the roof right now .... well .... my apologies ..... truth is, I do not beat my kid at all. In this culture it is too dangerous ... which takes me back to my idea of the Nebraska wilderness !!! It is starting to sound like incredible logic.
in all seriousness, my friend ...... change her diet and try to cut out all processed foods. Seriously ... I think this will help.
as far as lying goes .... there has to be consistent consequences for it EACH AND EVERY TIME. So ... this means you get to be a police officer every day ... put on the uniform .... stick the badge on .... and police the entire day and give tickets for every infraction every single time. If she lies ... she has to pay. Every time. Period.
I make her write sentences. Like 100 if needed ... on up. One time she had to write 1,000 sentences. Stuff like .... "I will not lie" "I will follow directions" ...... things like that. This method is far from using a switch ..... but it does seem to help .....
I wish us both luck.
You're lucky your daughter has it. My mom has it (im 16) and she's completely insane.
tell her if she doesnt get her act together its up to her mothers house she goes. So she can live with soem crazy person. Also double her medication so she will act more normal
You could tell her to just tell the truth. And when she lies don't get angry just ask her ''do u want to end up like your mother?''