Could someone please give me some advice?!
Question: I work two jobs. I work part-time as a Spanish tutor at a college and full-time as a clerk at a convenience store. I really love the tutoring job, but I don't like the clerk job, mainly because of two things. For one, there are some juvenile delinquents who come into the store and steal things and cause chaos. Believe it or not, though, we're not allowed to kick the little monsters out permanently or altogther, because the company bigwigs are afraid they'll be sued for racial discrimination if they do. (Most of the kids are black.) Even worse, I have a coworker who is a drama queen who picked a fight with me the other day. I actually stormed out of the place, because I wasn't about to deal with her B.S., but I wasn't fired. One of my bosses has warned me that this woman is a drama queen and that she is a drama queen and a lying troublemaker. However, the reason why she's still there is because she is a good worker otherwise. I almost never call in sick anywhere, but I did today,
Answers: I work two jobs. I work part-time as a Spanish tutor at a college and full-time as a clerk at a convenience store. I really love the tutoring job, but I don't like the clerk job, mainly because of two things. For one, there are some juvenile delinquents who come into the store and steal things and cause chaos. Believe it or not, though, we're not allowed to kick the little monsters out permanently or altogther, because the company bigwigs are afraid they'll be sued for racial discrimination if they do. (Most of the kids are black.) Even worse, I have a coworker who is a drama queen who picked a fight with me the other day. I actually stormed out of the place, because I wasn't about to deal with her B.S., but I wasn't fired. One of my bosses has warned me that this woman is a drama queen and that she is a drama queen and a lying troublemaker. However, the reason why she's still there is because she is a good worker otherwise. I almost never call in sick anywhere, but I did today,
I feel for you, all I can say is, don't feel bad about taking a day off. You have to think about your self and if you feel like you can't cope and have issues with depression...well then you REALLY needed today off!
Maybe you should look for another job or teach full time.
Good luck sweetie :-)
xxx
Drama at the workplace is pretty much unavoidable. The best you can do is try not to get sucked in.
If you hate that specific place, it should be fairly easy to get another clerk job somewhere else. Check out your options, but if you need the money, don't quit until you secure another position elsewhere.
Sorry to hear that! Unfortunately, we have to deal with jerks whether we want to or not. I have a neighbor that I recently got into a fight with and I have to see her every once in a while. I just ignore her. Anyway, you could look for another job to get away from her. Or you could learn how to deal with her. If it's too stressful to be near her, maybe you should find another job. It sounds like you're not too happy there anyway. Good luck!
Being a manager myself, I would suggest that you confront her. Tell her that since you both have to work together, she needs to treat you with respect and try to get along. Tell her that if she doesnt you will have no choice but to go to the boss about it. By doing this, you're doing what your boss would expect, try to resolve it on your own. Then he will also see that you are trying. Then, if she still acts the same, go to the boss and tell him what you've said to her, that she still won't try and that you may be forced to look for work elsewhere. You can leave the last part out if you think he will let you go on the spot. It's hard to tell because although some people are in management positions, they don't belong there because they are not responsible people themselves.
The clerk job, I would guess, is one that can be replaced easier since those jobs are more common. Maybe that would be your best choice anyway because of the juveniles coming in. You never know what kind of things they will do and depending on the crime rate in your area, NO JOB is worth all the stress like that. You need to take care of you.
If you can't get yourself to confront the co-worker, I guess I'd just start looking for another job. One that is more safe and stress free. I hope this helps some. Good luck!
O>K><Your having a problem with the customer base and the lack of any type of management. your in a lose lose situation. change it ,no matter what you try you are going to get pounded by customers, and your ever faithful c0-worker. get out . your sanity is more importanr than the twelve pack some butthol justwalked out with. your better than this and by God you dont have to take it
A certain level of stress is unavoidable, in modern society, so it is a good idea to develop effective coping mechanisms. See stress treatments, at ezy build, below on page 42. Practise daily, one of the relaxation techniques on pages 2, 11, 2c, or 2i; whichever works best for you, but the mindfulness breathing for 15 - 20 mns is ideal, although the progressive muscle relaxation can be learned quickly, and takes only several minutes, if pressed for time. Employ the EFT version for use in public, for which you can reasonably claim that you have a headache, as you massage/tap your temples, but it may be advisable to restrict yourself to subvocalising (saying it to yourself, in your mind, not aloud). Section 53, and pages 2, 2.q and 2.o refer. "Even though I sometimes suffer from stress, I deeply and completely accept myself".
You can also multitask, using the gazing technique, as you walk/jog or exercise, by focusing on a distant object, noting any thoughts which flash across your mind, without pursuing any particular train of thought, just gently redirect your focus to the gazing. Yoga, or Tai Chi may suit others, better. For some people, visualisation of a quiet, relaxing scene, like a tropical beach, (feel the sun warming you, as a gentle breeze caresses your skin lightly, inhaling the tangy, salt laden spray from the sparkling, translucent, aqua waves, crashing on the white, sandy beach, as the seagulls swoop and cavort playfully overhead in a cloudless, azure sky; you feel just like one of them; free to soar and cartwheel, or just glide, in the moist, heavy air, and that this moment will last forever.....) works well for them.
Take 4 Omega 3 fish oil supplements, daily, replacing 2 of them with cod liver oil supplements, or a teaspoonful of the oil (I spread mine on toast, and mask its strong taste with fishpaste, and pepper), in the winter months only. Those people who receive adequate exposure to sunlight, daily, won't need the vitamin D from cod liver oil, but many people, particularly those in latitudes far from the equator, find this difficult, to achieve. Eat healthily, in accordance with your "nutritional type" as determined at http://www.mercola.com/ SEARCHBAR.
Try having a cup of "Tension Tamer", herbal tea (from supermarket tea aisles) from Celestial Seasonings, or make some at home, and cool, then bottle, and drink as needed (I find it so strong tasting, that I need to drink it quickly, followed by something like fruit juice, to take away the taste, but others may find it more tolerable). C(h)amomile tea is a more palatable option. As with all herbal/green teas, use lemon/lime, and/or a little sweetener (NOT ARTIFICIAL!!!) but no cream, or milk.
Xylitol, or Stevia is preferable, (health food stores) or fruit sugar (fructose, such as "Fruisana", from supermarket sugar aisles) or even a little honey, because these will reduce "sugar spikes", which later deplete you of energy. Minimise/eliminate consumption of highly processed foods, particularly grain products, such as white bread, donuts, cake, cookies/biscuits, or anything with sugar. Opt for more wholefoods, non-starchy vegetables, and fruit. There is a quiz about depression, through sections 1, and 2, at ezy build, below: print the result, and take along to your primary mental health care provider. With depression, there is a choice of possible treatment types which needs to be made, and you can decide to use either allopathy, (modern Western medicine) with its reliance on antidepressants and therapy, or alternative treatments, which I advise trying first. This is because antidepressants are known to increase the rates of suicide, homicide, and aberrent behavio(u)r, particularly with young people, and often have unwanted side effects, such as sexual dysfunction, and/or weight gain.
Tests have shown that apart from clinical (major) depression, their results were not significantly superior to those taking a placebo (inert, or "sugar pill"). Antidepressants retain a degree of long term effectiveness for only around 30% of people. There is a saying in the mental health field: "If the only tool you have in your kit is a hammer, you tend to treat everything as a nail". So it goes with doctors, and their prescription pads: handy, quick, and convenient, when trying to manage their large list of patients, and often allocating only 10 minutes to each.
Most of them are only trained to provide antidepressants and referrals for therapy, with those whose depression is resistant to those treatments being advised to have ElectroConvulsive Therapy, (ECT) with its risk of permanent, partial memory loss. Therapy, while often effective at first, becomes "same old, same old" after a while, for many people.
I now advise people to: (1.) Take 4 Omega 3 fish oil supplements, daily, (certified free of mercury) with an antioxidant, such as an orange, or grapefruit, or their freshly squeezed juice. If vitamin E is used, it should be certified as being 100% from natural sources, or it's synthetic, avoid it. (2.) Work up slowly to 30 - 60 minutes of exercise, daily. (3.) Occupational therapy (keeping busy allows little time for unproductive introspection, and keeps mental activity out of less desirable areas of the brain). (4.) Use daily, one of the relaxation methods in sections 2, 2.c, 2.i, or 11, and/or yoga, Tai Chi, and/or the EFT, in sections 2.q, 2.o, and section 53, at http://www.ezy-build.net.nz/~shaneris whichever works best for you. (5.) Initially, at least, some form of counselling, preferably either Cognitive Behavio(u)ral Therapy, or Rational Emotive Behavio(u)ral Therapy. (6.) As options, if desired, either a known, effective herbal remedy, such as St. John's wort, or a supplement, such as SAMe, or Inositol (from vitamin and health food stores, some supermarkets, or mail order: view section 55).
If the amount of daylight you have been exposed to recently has reduced, perhaps due to the change of seasons, see Seasonal Affective Disorder (S.A.D.) in section 2, at http://www.ezy-build.net.nz/~shaneris and, instead of taking around 4 Omega 3 fish oil supplements, daily; replace 2 of them with cod liver oil supplements for the winter months only! (or, as probably a better alternative to the 2 cod liver oil supplements: 1 teaspoonful of cod liver oil, with a little butter, to ensure its use; I take mine on sourdough rye bread, or toast, covered with fishpaste, and pepper, to mask the strong taste). Optimal levels are 50 - 55 ng/ml (115 - 125 nmol / L). It should be above 32 ng/ml.
Don't use medications and supplements together, without medical advice, except for Omega 3, which is safe, anytime. Omega 3 fish oil supplements: EPA (eicosapentaenoic acid (omega 3) ----360 mg.DHA (docosahexaenoic acid (omega 3)-----240 mg
Take enough supplements to attain, or exceed the levels (no possibility of overdose) of those every day, with an orange, or the juice of a freshly squeezed orange, grapefruit, or other antioxidant.
(make sure the epa is higher then the dha) important for adults... kids need the opposite levels: more dha than epa, but all are beneficial, if you can't achieve the recommended proportions.
They should be certified as being free of mercury, and if containing vitamin E, it should be shown as from a natural source; otherwise it is synthetic: avoid it! Consider having your doctor test your vitamin D levels, (60% of depressed people have low vitamin D levels!) using the 25 Hydroxyvitamin D test. Those people who receive adequate exposure to sunlight, daily, won't need the vitamin D from cod liver oil, but many people, particularly those in latitudes far from the equator, find this difficult to achieve.
If the above is insufficient for you, after several months, (unlikely) try one of the alternatives, such as the neurofeedback, magnetic, or low current electrical stimulation, or EMDR therapy, (see sections 33 - 34) keeping ECT back, as a last resort.
AS YOU APPEAR TO BE A VERY GOOD TUTOR AT COLLEGE,TRY FOR MORE WORK OF THIS SORT. ASSERT YOURSELF TO THIS WOMAN,AS MOST BITCHES BACK AWAY FROM A STRONG MAN.YOU ARE BETTER THAN HER AND DON,T FORGET THIS!!!!