My son cut himself?!
Question: My 16 year old son started dating this girl about a month ago and today we were called to school because a third period teacher noticed a deep cut on his face both sides and so we were instructed to take him to the hospital for treatment and then a mental health clinic which he says he was just curios and the theropist said he had never dealt with someone cutting of the face...he did this with a box cutter..Later this evening he kept me from seeing his left arm and when i eas able to make him show me it had several cuts in it looked to me like days old...he says he will never do it again and he was only curious ...I don't know what else to do..is there anyone out there that has heard of cutting the face or any internet info on this..I see about the arms and legs but nothing on the face..HELP PLEASE!!!
Answers: ok...trust me...your son feels extreemly bad for hurting you. I was in his position. Ill tell you what i know and my personal opinions. i am in no way a professional but i did a lot of research and have dealt with cutting and self abuse for many years. I know that cutting can get worse with time, and ususally, especially in todays world can begin as a curiosity. most often times the worst cases are in boys who can even go as far as castrating themselvs. i know it sounds crazy but cutting can become addictive and its hard to stop once you get started. constant therapy is key. as for your son cutting his face...this could be a sign of asking for help. maybe this has been going on longer than you thought. for me...i cut my thighs and hid them for over a year, and when i was fed up with hiding and wated help i cut my wrists and worse short sleeves. Maybe this was the only way he knew how to ask for help. It is alarming that he did cut his face, but there mgiht be reasons unknown to us....maybe he has a disabling loating of his face and wanted to reflect that (it sounds weird but it can be true.) listen...i learned a lot from a book called "bodily harm" by karen conterio and wendy lader. pick it up and sher it with your son so he can learn too. also, i know he is younger than 18, but he will benefit more from therapy if you let him go and dont interfere. I knoy began to benefit from my therapy when i knew my therpaist wouldnt tell my mom waht i told him. teenage years are very scary and secretive...(for example sometimes cutting can be born of a sexually abusive past...he may not want to admit that to you but knowing that you may not know mgiht allow him to open up more and benefit more from talking even if you arent directly a part of it.) make sense? ok i know there is a lot more information that id like to share, and i cant fit it all in here...but if you want to email me ill leave my address. also...if you have any more specific questions...about my experience or my opinions then please let me know.
your son loves you and knows you lvoe him, but a lot of times cutting can be so far beyond that, that its ahrd to explain. i didnt know why i did it for the longest time. also...its alarming how many kids do it today to "be cool". I (my therapist agrees) think that you can tell the severity of the situation by where and how deep. i showed up as one of the more devere cases he had seen in a while because he gets a lot of teen with superficial scratches whose parents overreacted and brought them to therapy. i am assuming of course that your son isnt one of these kids...but also that he has not needed stitches yet...which is good (i have had a few hundred...and trust me...im not proud of it...i even sliced through part of my muscle in my thigh...that was traumatic.) it gets worse with time...but liek i said its hard to fit it all here...so please e-mail me.