Can you help with some ideas?!
Question: Can you help with some ideas!?
I've been reading too much stuff online that has made me too anxious to sleep tonight!. What would be some positive ways to help get me stay asleep!?
Also, my daughter has tests at school this week and always makes herself miserable before going to sleep!. She refuses to sleep alone and will shriek and fight about it till we can finally convince her!. It's not as if she has only sleeptime to exert "control" over either coz she won't clean her room or do anything else either, unless it's for someone at school!. So, any ideas on kind peaceful ways!. I'm not the one who has to put her to sleep most nights, and the one who is doesn't do bedtime stories or bible reading or any of that!. When it's bedtime, it's time to go!.!.!.!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Also, my daughter has tests at school this week and always makes herself miserable before going to sleep!. She refuses to sleep alone and will shriek and fight about it till we can finally convince her!. It's not as if she has only sleeptime to exert "control" over either coz she won't clean her room or do anything else either, unless it's for someone at school!. So, any ideas on kind peaceful ways!. I'm not the one who has to put her to sleep most nights, and the one who is doesn't do bedtime stories or bible reading or any of that!. When it's bedtime, it's time to go!.!.!.!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Answers:
Anxiety: (1!.) Fear: My standard post follows, but learn to identify, and confront your fears: a fear confronted is a fear reduced!. If you don't know what they are, write down 3 times, before going to sleep: "Tonight, in my dreams, I want to remember seeing what my fear is, when I get up"!. Then say it aloud 3 times, after lights out!. If this works, it should produce a response in 2 weeks; if not, you may not be remembering, so set an alarm to go off after, first, 3 hrs; next night 4; next night 5: have a pen & paper handy, and WRITE DOWN THOSE DREAMS!!! Remember, the response may be metaphorical (figurative), rather than literal!. There is a section on dream interpretation, here in Y!A, (feel free to email me by clicking on my profile, but I am a lot better with interpreting dreams of males, than females) if you have any difficulty, but the idea is to, immediately after waking & writing down, question the characters inhabiting that dream, and note any thoughts, images, impressions, or emotions which result!.
Then use the confrontation method, in section 3, on recurring nightmares, at ezy-build, below!. Take up a course in Tae Kwon Do, Kung Fu, or Tang Soo Do, etc!., as much for the mental techniques you will learn, as the ability to face physical fear, which may well have a carry over effect in the dream state, at night, influencing your subconscious mind!. ~~~ Generalised Anxiety Disorder: There is a saying in the mental health field: "if the only tool you have in your kit is a hammer, you tend to treat everything as a nail"!. So it goes with doctors, and their prescription pads: handy, quick, and convenient, when trying to manage a large list of patients, with very limited time for each!.
With anxiolytics (anti-anxiety medication, such as Lexapro, or Paxil, which treat both anxiety and depression) you are only addressing the symptoms, and even then, often only temporarily, as your system becomes used to it, and you have to accept the risks of an increased suicide/homicide rate, aberrant behaviour, and side effects, such as possible sexual dysfunction (common)!. For those reasons, I recommend first trying the alternatives, which not only treat the symptoms, using herbal remedies, or supplements like inositol, but the cause, as well, using EFT, and relaxation techniques!. The anxiolytics/antidepressants will still be there, should the alternatives prove insufficient for you!.
See anxiety treatments, at ezy build (below) in section 6!. Set yourself a specific time period for worrying about anything, (say; around three quarters of an hour, possibly when you get home in the evening, but not too close to bedtime) after which, resolve firmly to refuse to even entertain the thought of worrying again on that day: realise and accept that to do otherwise would be counterproductive to your mental health, and enjoyment of life!. You will have had your "worry time" for the day, and can just write down any more thoughts that come to mind, and say to yourself: "Well, I'll just have to worry about that tomorrow, won't I!?"!. It is important to deal with a negative internal monologue (self talk), or mental process, such as disturbing thoughts, or images, by the process of (a): recognising it, and (b): challenging it immediately!. When you notice something negative, such as: "I'm never going to get over this!" or: "Why am I always so pathetic/useless/such a loser!?" or even: "I can't do this/will never get the hang of this!", or a disturbing image, recognise that this is part of the mindset which will hold you back from progressing in your recovery!. Having identified and labelled it, I first visualise a large, flashing red "STOP!" SIGN, then I say to myself as forcefully as you can, even aloud in a big voice, if alone: "I know this tactic: GO AWAY FOR A WHILE !!!" You may want to use either: "ruse", "ploy", "game", or "trick", instead of "tactic"!. In the case of an image, visualise a large "STOP" sign, or your preferred version!. Some people go so far as to keep a wide rubber band in their pocket, then put it around their wrist, when they catch themselves backsliding, stretch and release it, as a method of reprogramming their mind sooner, but I don't regard it as being strictly necessary!. Remember to remove it, afterwards, if you use this method!.
Practice one of the relaxation methods on pages 2, 11, 2c, or 2i, daily, and when needed!. Alternatively, give the EFT a good tryout, to see if it helps you!. There is also a version for use in public places, (if you like, you can claim to have a headache, as you massage/lightly tap your temples, but you would then be restricted to subvocalising: saying it to yourself in your mind)!. Section 53, and pages 2, 2!.q and 2!.o at http://www!.ezy-build!.net!.nz/~shaneris also refer: "Even though I sometimes suffer from anxiety, I deeply and completely accept myself!." Neurofeedback treatment for anxiety is increasingly becoming available!. Herbal remedies, such as St!.John's wort, arctic root, or Valerian are often effective, but the idea is to use them like water wings, or training wheels on a bicycle, providing initial support, and giving time for other treatments, such as therapy, and relaxation techniques, to take effect!.
(The following is a variant of EMDR therapy, which has been used successfully for those people suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, insomnia, and anxiety: it is easily learned, quick to use, yet can be very effective)!. Prior to using either of the methods in the above paragraph, first sit comfortably, and take a deep breath!. Then, without moving your head, move your eyes from the left, to the right, and back again, taking around a second to do so (say: a thousand and one: this takes approximately a second)!. Repeat this procedure (without the words, although you can count, subvocally if you like) 20 times!. Then close your eyes and relax!. Become aware of any tension or discomfort you feel!.
Then open your eyes, and take another deep breath, and repeat step one, closing your eyes, and relaxing afterwards, in the same manner!. Then, repeat the procedure one last time!. Some people may find that this is all they need do!. With experience, you may find that you can practise this in public, with your eyes closed, which greatly widens the window of opportunity for its use, and avoids attracting unwanted attention!.
~~~ You can't shut your mind off!. Instead, put your mind in a position where it wants to shut itself off!. ~~~~~ See insomnia treatments, in section 3, at ezy build, below!. Use one of the relaxation methods, in bed, after lights out, on pages 2, 11, 2!.c, or 2!.i, but they can take some time to learn, (progressive muscular relaxation excepted) so learn and become proficient in their use during the day; an alternative is to use the EFT, in section 53, and pages 2!.q, and 2!.o, saying to yourself: "Even though I currently have a sleep disorder, I deeply and completely accept myself!." (or choose your own wording) while you use the acupressure tapping!.
Find out which works best for you, in the daylight hours, so you will be prepared, come bedtime!. For many people, a good idea is to develop a set "wind down" routine for the last hour before bedtime, so your subconscious mind learns that it is time to put thinking aside, and prepare for mindfulness, (awareness, without cogitation/purposeful thought) or the EFT, in preparation for sleep, but the idea with mindfulness is to not even think about sleeping: just drift off, naturally, during exercising those techniques!. (The following is a variant of EMDR therapy, which has been used successfully for those people suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, insomnia, and anxiety: it is easily learned, quick to use, yet can be very effective)!. Prior to using either of the methods in the above paragraph, first sit, or lie down comfortably, and take a deep breath!.
Then, without moving your head, move your eyes from the left, to the right, and back again, taking around a second to do so (say: a thousand and one: this takes approximately a second)!. Repeat this procedure (without the words, although you can count, subvocally if you like) 20 times!. Then close your eyes and relax!. Become aware of any tension or discomfort you feel!. Then open your eyes, and take another deep breath, and repeat step one, closing your eyes, and relaxing afterwards, in the same manner!. Then, repeat the procedure one last time!. Some people may find that this is all they need do!. With experience, you may find that you can practise this with your eyes closed!. ~~~ Teach her the EMDR variant, and employ the other advice (warm bath 1 hr before bed; warm milk afterwards, lavender drops, routine, etc!.) and, for a while, stay with her, as she falls asleep!. See www!.kidshealth!.com Consider letting her sleep with a large, furry, stuffed toy, as a way of overcoming the separation anxiety she probably feels, and ask if she would like a nightlight!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Then use the confrontation method, in section 3, on recurring nightmares, at ezy-build, below!. Take up a course in Tae Kwon Do, Kung Fu, or Tang Soo Do, etc!., as much for the mental techniques you will learn, as the ability to face physical fear, which may well have a carry over effect in the dream state, at night, influencing your subconscious mind!. ~~~ Generalised Anxiety Disorder: There is a saying in the mental health field: "if the only tool you have in your kit is a hammer, you tend to treat everything as a nail"!. So it goes with doctors, and their prescription pads: handy, quick, and convenient, when trying to manage a large list of patients, with very limited time for each!.
With anxiolytics (anti-anxiety medication, such as Lexapro, or Paxil, which treat both anxiety and depression) you are only addressing the symptoms, and even then, often only temporarily, as your system becomes used to it, and you have to accept the risks of an increased suicide/homicide rate, aberrant behaviour, and side effects, such as possible sexual dysfunction (common)!. For those reasons, I recommend first trying the alternatives, which not only treat the symptoms, using herbal remedies, or supplements like inositol, but the cause, as well, using EFT, and relaxation techniques!. The anxiolytics/antidepressants will still be there, should the alternatives prove insufficient for you!.
See anxiety treatments, at ezy build (below) in section 6!. Set yourself a specific time period for worrying about anything, (say; around three quarters of an hour, possibly when you get home in the evening, but not too close to bedtime) after which, resolve firmly to refuse to even entertain the thought of worrying again on that day: realise and accept that to do otherwise would be counterproductive to your mental health, and enjoyment of life!. You will have had your "worry time" for the day, and can just write down any more thoughts that come to mind, and say to yourself: "Well, I'll just have to worry about that tomorrow, won't I!?"!. It is important to deal with a negative internal monologue (self talk), or mental process, such as disturbing thoughts, or images, by the process of (a): recognising it, and (b): challenging it immediately!. When you notice something negative, such as: "I'm never going to get over this!" or: "Why am I always so pathetic/useless/such a loser!?" or even: "I can't do this/will never get the hang of this!", or a disturbing image, recognise that this is part of the mindset which will hold you back from progressing in your recovery!. Having identified and labelled it, I first visualise a large, flashing red "STOP!" SIGN, then I say to myself as forcefully as you can, even aloud in a big voice, if alone: "I know this tactic: GO AWAY FOR A WHILE !!!" You may want to use either: "ruse", "ploy", "game", or "trick", instead of "tactic"!. In the case of an image, visualise a large "STOP" sign, or your preferred version!. Some people go so far as to keep a wide rubber band in their pocket, then put it around their wrist, when they catch themselves backsliding, stretch and release it, as a method of reprogramming their mind sooner, but I don't regard it as being strictly necessary!. Remember to remove it, afterwards, if you use this method!.
Practice one of the relaxation methods on pages 2, 11, 2c, or 2i, daily, and when needed!. Alternatively, give the EFT a good tryout, to see if it helps you!. There is also a version for use in public places, (if you like, you can claim to have a headache, as you massage/lightly tap your temples, but you would then be restricted to subvocalising: saying it to yourself in your mind)!. Section 53, and pages 2, 2!.q and 2!.o at http://www!.ezy-build!.net!.nz/~shaneris also refer: "Even though I sometimes suffer from anxiety, I deeply and completely accept myself!." Neurofeedback treatment for anxiety is increasingly becoming available!. Herbal remedies, such as St!.John's wort, arctic root, or Valerian are often effective, but the idea is to use them like water wings, or training wheels on a bicycle, providing initial support, and giving time for other treatments, such as therapy, and relaxation techniques, to take effect!.
(The following is a variant of EMDR therapy, which has been used successfully for those people suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, insomnia, and anxiety: it is easily learned, quick to use, yet can be very effective)!. Prior to using either of the methods in the above paragraph, first sit comfortably, and take a deep breath!. Then, without moving your head, move your eyes from the left, to the right, and back again, taking around a second to do so (say: a thousand and one: this takes approximately a second)!. Repeat this procedure (without the words, although you can count, subvocally if you like) 20 times!. Then close your eyes and relax!. Become aware of any tension or discomfort you feel!.
Then open your eyes, and take another deep breath, and repeat step one, closing your eyes, and relaxing afterwards, in the same manner!. Then, repeat the procedure one last time!. Some people may find that this is all they need do!. With experience, you may find that you can practise this in public, with your eyes closed, which greatly widens the window of opportunity for its use, and avoids attracting unwanted attention!.
~~~ You can't shut your mind off!. Instead, put your mind in a position where it wants to shut itself off!. ~~~~~ See insomnia treatments, in section 3, at ezy build, below!. Use one of the relaxation methods, in bed, after lights out, on pages 2, 11, 2!.c, or 2!.i, but they can take some time to learn, (progressive muscular relaxation excepted) so learn and become proficient in their use during the day; an alternative is to use the EFT, in section 53, and pages 2!.q, and 2!.o, saying to yourself: "Even though I currently have a sleep disorder, I deeply and completely accept myself!." (or choose your own wording) while you use the acupressure tapping!.
Find out which works best for you, in the daylight hours, so you will be prepared, come bedtime!. For many people, a good idea is to develop a set "wind down" routine for the last hour before bedtime, so your subconscious mind learns that it is time to put thinking aside, and prepare for mindfulness, (awareness, without cogitation/purposeful thought) or the EFT, in preparation for sleep, but the idea with mindfulness is to not even think about sleeping: just drift off, naturally, during exercising those techniques!. (The following is a variant of EMDR therapy, which has been used successfully for those people suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, insomnia, and anxiety: it is easily learned, quick to use, yet can be very effective)!. Prior to using either of the methods in the above paragraph, first sit, or lie down comfortably, and take a deep breath!.
Then, without moving your head, move your eyes from the left, to the right, and back again, taking around a second to do so (say: a thousand and one: this takes approximately a second)!. Repeat this procedure (without the words, although you can count, subvocally if you like) 20 times!. Then close your eyes and relax!. Become aware of any tension or discomfort you feel!. Then open your eyes, and take another deep breath, and repeat step one, closing your eyes, and relaxing afterwards, in the same manner!. Then, repeat the procedure one last time!. Some people may find that this is all they need do!. With experience, you may find that you can practise this with your eyes closed!. ~~~ Teach her the EMDR variant, and employ the other advice (warm bath 1 hr before bed; warm milk afterwards, lavender drops, routine, etc!.) and, for a while, stay with her, as she falls asleep!. See www!.kidshealth!.com Consider letting her sleep with a large, furry, stuffed toy, as a way of overcoming the separation anxiety she probably feels, and ask if she would like a nightlight!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
well i would say if she is in grade school and not cleaning her room even with the guidence of you in there with her i would get a trash bag and clean her room for her weather you throw her things away or just put them away for awhile it might work its what iv had to do the bedroom situation she might have seperation anxiaty i also had that problem with my son and for you i would suggeust on making amomment for you it could be a book bubble bath t!.v just somethin that can distract your mind so it can rest from reality so to say i hope could be of some help good luckWww@Answer-Health@Com