How do you handle this ?!
Question: How do you handle this !?
i have ptsd and borderline personality disorder- im 30 now !. alot of my life ive suffered mental bullying, taunts, victimization , psychological abuse etc!.
its the reason today i have severe low self esteem, have struggled to build any relationships and havee alot of rage problems!.
however i feel bad about myself because i think back, i feel weak and inadequete or inferior because i feel like i let people do that to me, because i didnt fight back when it was happening!.
why did i let them do that to me !?
im thinking does it make me a weak person that allowed others to wear me down!.!.!.break me and eat away at me to reduce me to have all these life issues !?
when i think about it like that i feel full of rage and really want to explode with rage!.
i feel bad that i let them do that to me!.
does it mean im weak !?
im waiting for therapy right now!. and doing my best to control my rage and paranoia!.!.!.although living with severe low self esteem is very difficult!.
what does anyone think!?Www@Answer-Health@Com
its the reason today i have severe low self esteem, have struggled to build any relationships and havee alot of rage problems!.
however i feel bad about myself because i think back, i feel weak and inadequete or inferior because i feel like i let people do that to me, because i didnt fight back when it was happening!.
why did i let them do that to me !?
im thinking does it make me a weak person that allowed others to wear me down!.!.!.break me and eat away at me to reduce me to have all these life issues !?
when i think about it like that i feel full of rage and really want to explode with rage!.
i feel bad that i let them do that to me!.
does it mean im weak !?
im waiting for therapy right now!. and doing my best to control my rage and paranoia!.!.!.although living with severe low self esteem is very difficult!.
what does anyone think!?Www@Answer-Health@Com
Answers:
hey sweetie!.!.!.!.i am 36 and i have ptsd, bipolar II ultra rapid cycling and borderline personality disorder with histrionic traits!.!.!.
in NO way are you weak!.!.!.this is a learned disorder from the abuse we have taken on as kids and growing up without ever standing up for ourselves!. we learned this from others, from others actions!. our self worth is different from other peoples!.!.!.we see things in a totally different way!. we believe our self worth is from what others tells us!.!.!.NOT from what we are and what we would like to become!. we believe what people tell us to be the truth, when we are much more!.!.!.
one thing to remeber is that BBD is a learned personality!.!.!.not a disease or an illness!.!.!.there aren't any meds for BBD only meds to help with the mood swings, depression things of that nature!. Like my BBD is from a long abusive childhood!.!.!.a learned behavior!.!.!.a learned personality!. it IS a hard road to travail!.!.!.but with the right help you can learn to travail down a much smoother road that is normally less travailed by BBD's!. I am not saying my life is smooth by far!.!.!.
i have a identical twin sister we are 7minutes apart!.!.!.!.so when i was growing up it was a competition!. but it turned out i was the BAD twin and she was the GOOD twin!. and that label has stuck to this very day!. i will never no matter what i do be able to live my childhood down!. everyone always said why cant you be more like her, why cant you do this like her, cant you just act like her, she is so much better than at this and that!.!.!.so my self worth was pretty much shitt! so even to this day i recent the fact she has a better job than me, she has a better home than me!.!.!.!.but you see i dont look at the good!.!.!.i have a job that i love, i soooo love my house!. i just see how much better she is at life than myself!.
so you see you are NOT weak it is the nature of the disorder!. it makes us think we are less than we truly are!. it is a hard life to lead with this disorder!. it is a constant stuggle within your brain to know what to believe about your very own self!.
i am glad you are going to start therapy!.!.!.ive been in treatment for the past 25 yrs!. i take a ton of medication, but it seems to work for me!. the meds are mood stabilizers!. i still have my mood swings and my thoughts of being a loser!.!.!.but the meds help with my thoughts as well!.
i wish you tons upon tons of luck! you can live with this disorder!. i have for more than 25 yrs!.!.!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
in NO way are you weak!.!.!.this is a learned disorder from the abuse we have taken on as kids and growing up without ever standing up for ourselves!. we learned this from others, from others actions!. our self worth is different from other peoples!.!.!.we see things in a totally different way!. we believe our self worth is from what others tells us!.!.!.NOT from what we are and what we would like to become!. we believe what people tell us to be the truth, when we are much more!.!.!.
one thing to remeber is that BBD is a learned personality!.!.!.not a disease or an illness!.!.!.there aren't any meds for BBD only meds to help with the mood swings, depression things of that nature!. Like my BBD is from a long abusive childhood!.!.!.a learned behavior!.!.!.a learned personality!. it IS a hard road to travail!.!.!.but with the right help you can learn to travail down a much smoother road that is normally less travailed by BBD's!. I am not saying my life is smooth by far!.!.!.
i have a identical twin sister we are 7minutes apart!.!.!.!.so when i was growing up it was a competition!. but it turned out i was the BAD twin and she was the GOOD twin!. and that label has stuck to this very day!. i will never no matter what i do be able to live my childhood down!. everyone always said why cant you be more like her, why cant you do this like her, cant you just act like her, she is so much better than at this and that!.!.!.so my self worth was pretty much shitt! so even to this day i recent the fact she has a better job than me, she has a better home than me!.!.!.!.but you see i dont look at the good!.!.!.i have a job that i love, i soooo love my house!. i just see how much better she is at life than myself!.
so you see you are NOT weak it is the nature of the disorder!. it makes us think we are less than we truly are!. it is a hard life to lead with this disorder!. it is a constant stuggle within your brain to know what to believe about your very own self!.
i am glad you are going to start therapy!.!.!.ive been in treatment for the past 25 yrs!. i take a ton of medication, but it seems to work for me!. the meds are mood stabilizers!. i still have my mood swings and my thoughts of being a loser!.!.!.but the meds help with my thoughts as well!.
i wish you tons upon tons of luck! you can live with this disorder!. i have for more than 25 yrs!.!.!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Every person has some type of low self-esteem issue!. I mite seem like the confident guy to otherz on the outside, buh itz jst my mask I try to hide behind!. I am really the type ov person who will sit n da mirror and jst pick at myself!. I been made fun ov before and know how it feelz!. U shud not let what happen in ur past mess with urself esteem!. People talk about everybodie on a daily basis!. People even talkd about Jesus Christ wen he roamed the land!. It doesn't make u a weak perosn buh wunce u learn to get pass that den it will make u a stronger person!. Kidz are the most honest brutal people!. And it hurts but you jst have to learn to love yoursf for who you are!. And be grateful for who u are becuz u have a purpose in lifeWww@Answer-Health@Com
Just because people picked on you doesnt make you a weak person!. People form into groups because they're scared to be alone!. You have to be able to take that rage, sink it down, and pretend it never happened!. Everyone has a cold section in their heart where they bottle up bad memories and such!. Take that rage away, and just be kind!. You'll meet more and more people, and if you act the way you do now your just isolating yourself, and making strangers pick on you behind your back!. You dont have to be confident, just pretend it's another you!. Theres a word for people the millions of people, not being cared by anyone, struggling against rage and fear from the past, "the anonymous soldiers"!.
I wouldnt put therapy as a choice myself, all therapists are hypocrites, u have to deal with it on your ownWww@Answer-Health@Com
I wouldnt put therapy as a choice myself, all therapists are hypocrites, u have to deal with it on your ownWww@Answer-Health@Com
There are milllions of people in your boat!. For every child who fights back their are 10 who don't!. We protect ourselves as best we can and we all do it differently!. The fact that you coped by backing off doesn't say anything bad about you!. I'm glad you are getting help because the worst thing about your situation is that you are still letting it affect you!. The more you dwell on it, the more you are still letting these people win!. I'm not an expert but have taught assertion classes and one of the most powerful things to do, I found, is to write down good things about yourself - and there are good things!. Write down everything nice that happens to you - and try to make things happen - even small things like talking to someone, smiling at someone!. Read these back to yourself at night and enjoy the feelings they give you!. One big thing you might think about is how people feel about you now!. When we are in a circle of despondency we tend to think others are feeling negative about us when they aren't at all!. You aren't weak - you are a survivor - with help I hope you'll be a survivor who can leave the past behind and craft yourself a new, better future!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
I was a child who never fought back!. My mother physically and verbally abused me and my brother sexually molested me!. I was afraid to tell someone because I was afraid that no one would believe me!. It definitely killed my self esteem and self confidence!. I wish I fought back and didn't let them treat me that way!. Years later I put them out of my life for good and went into therapy!. I learned that I am no longer a victim but a survivor!. I also suffered from ptsd!. I am also Bipolar and I blame it on my traumatic childhood!. The stressed caused so many health problems for me!. I am free now and I am strong!. I have come so far!. I have a great life now!. I am married with two beautiful children!. I was afraid to have relationships with people for a long time and if I did I wound up fighting with them and not forgiving them!. It was hard for me to let people in because I didn't trust them!. I have great relationships now!. I am a born again Baptist!. I put my faith in the Lord and my life is the best it's ever been!. I don't feel bad at all about no having my family in my life!. On the contrary, I feel free and at peace!. It's very empowering!. You have to stop living in the past or it will eat away at you!. Just let it go!. It is what it is and you can't change it so stop thinking about it!. Forget about the past, live in the present, and don't worry about the future!.Www@Answer-Health@Com