How do you reach the unreachable?!


Question: How do you reach the unreachable!?
I have a friend who exhibits the most self-destructive life I have ever seen!. In the interest of space, I'll abbreviate :

* She abuses alcohol and drugs on a daily/nightly basis!. When I say 'abuse', I don't mean one beer or one joint!.

* She was bitten by a dog (inadvertently) while trying to break up a dog fight!. She has refused to go to the hospital, nor to take her dog to the vet to be checked out!.

* She lost her debit card two weeks ago!. She has yet to call to cancel the card!.

All of the above examples have taken place within the last two weeks!. To ask her about any of them, she'll simply say, "I don't care" or "no big deal"!.

This has been ongoing!. She is employed, but her salary is near the poverty level!. She spends far beyond her means on trivial things!. She is 25, and at her current rate, I doubt she'll see 30!.

How do you get someone to see that they are killing themselves slowly!?Www@Answer-Health@Com


Answers:
Unfortunately you friend is displaying all the signs of depression!. She needs professional help!. A lot of people who are depressed use alcohol and drugs to try to "cover up" the bad feelings they are feeling!. The dog bite and the credit card are also very classic symptoms!.!.!.!.she just is so down and out that she doesn't care about anything anymore!. She lives day to day not caring!. She needs professional help!. Talk to her as a friend!.!.!.!.!.!.be polite and nice and expect her to get upset!.!.!.!.!.most people who are depressed will not willingly admit it unless they are at a total loss!. Talk to her until the cows come home!. Don't do it once, but twice or as many times as it takes!. Remind her that she could be living a happy and healthy life is she would just take the reigns and get some help!. Good luck!.!.!.!.you definitely are a good friend to care!.!.!.a star for you!!!!Www@Answer-Health@Com

The best you can do is be her friend and encourage her to quit the drugs, go to the doctor, leave her credit cards at home and only hold on to one!. It doesn't seem to bother her and that's what is important!. Maybe she does need help, maybe the partying and shrugging things off is her way of self medicating or with issues!. She will never get help unless she takes the first step: realizing she needs help!. Just be her friend and try to stop carrying the load for her!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

from what i read, i think she is depressed (depends the level or degree)!. i see her seems to be losing the interest of life!. losing the joy of life!. live as in just for the sake of living!. thats why nothing will bother her!. As depression comes after low self-esteem, therefore she doesnt bother to love her body (who cares!.!.) she doesnt care about the credit card!.!.!. (nah!.!. not a big deal!.!. i dont care!.!.!.!.)!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!. Lastly, in order to cure depression, TIME is the key issue!. Time -> Patient -> Love -> Heart -> God!. God Bless your friend and you!. =) p/s: we gonna admit that not all things are under our control, so the BEST is PRAY! humble ourself and ask God for help!. ^^ best wishes my friendWww@Answer-Health@Com

is she happy,,, it is not for us to judge the philosophical paradigms of others sir,,,, individuallity means that the person will do what they want regardless of perceivable consequenceWww@Answer-Health@Com

She needs to see the forest for the trees first!. Nothing you could possibly say or do will make her do this if she chooses to be blind to it!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

Maybe everyone who loves her should make an intervention for her!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

maybe you should show her an example of herself through another person: find someone she looks up to or would listen to!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

kick some sense into her!.!.!.id kick her *** if she were my friend!.!.!.TOUGH LOVE BABY!!!Www@Answer-Health@Com

How do you reach the unreachable ~
My inclination is that you do not reach!. You become comfortable* with yourself and within yourself with the only thing you can control - yourself!.

I don't want that to sound too self-centered, but that's what it is!. YOU would make better choices than your friend is!. YOU want to help!.

Give her all the love you can and if and when it gets to the point that you can no longer be around it, then remove yourself!.

And I am truly sorry that I don't have better news for you!.
After 10 years of nagging, I got my husband to stop drinking, but he had reached the point where he was trying to control it and it was obvious that it wasn't working!. Thank God (just an expression :-) But apart from a 'partner' situation, I don't see how just a friend can exert enough influence to 'make' someone change their ways when they don't want to!. Hopefully you'll still be around to help if and when she gets to the point where she wants to quit!.

**edit**
I like 'latj's' advice very much!. I didn't think about depression as I'm such an annoyingly cheerful sort!. Good luck ~ maybe there is hope!.

*comfortable!. If your comfort level requires you staging an intervention / driving her to the hospital / whatever - you will determine what you can live with!. Hardest thing I had to learn was that the only person I can control is me!.!.!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

She displays a lot of symptoms of an addiction, so I think that is the thing that should be treated first and foremost!. Often people wrapped up in drug dependence neglect every other facet of their life!. Even if there is some underlying mental issue, it can't be treated as long as she drinks and/or takes drugs!.

Get a bunch of her family and friends together to express their concerns!. She might think she's only hurting herself but when she realizes the impact on others it might make her think about getting help!.Www@Answer-Health@Com





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