How can I be more optimistic?!
Question: How can I be more optimistic!?
It seems that I totter back and forth between the mini-Nietzsche "we're all just ****-chucking apes and let's all start killing ourselves because life is worthless" nihilism state, and an oblivious "I am militantly unaware of my environment" happiness!.
I'd really like to find a happy medium between the two (I am NOT bipolar by the way, and even if I was, I disapprove of drugging people to make them happy)!.
Seriously, here's how I talk to myself sometimes: "Amy, life is WONDERFUL and we LOVE it because, even if we're not happy, there's still the sunshine and the trees and-- no, life's horrible! The world is rotting and people are becoming stupider and stupider! We should all become hermits in Texas! People are so stupid and worthless! They should be called sheepl- no, don't talk like that!.!.!. Life is WONDERFUL and!.!.!." blah blah!.
Help!? (sighs)Www@Answer-Health@Com
I'd really like to find a happy medium between the two (I am NOT bipolar by the way, and even if I was, I disapprove of drugging people to make them happy)!.
Seriously, here's how I talk to myself sometimes: "Amy, life is WONDERFUL and we LOVE it because, even if we're not happy, there's still the sunshine and the trees and-- no, life's horrible! The world is rotting and people are becoming stupider and stupider! We should all become hermits in Texas! People are so stupid and worthless! They should be called sheepl- no, don't talk like that!.!.!. Life is WONDERFUL and!.!.!." blah blah!.
Help!? (sighs)Www@Answer-Health@Com
Answers:
I'm like you: a fatalistic, glass-half-empty person when left to my own devices!. I've found a combination of four things that seem to help me be more optomistic:
First, pat yourself on the back for recognizing that the world is going completely to hell as we speak!. AIDS, global warming, the energy crisis, reality TV!.!.!.yep, it's all real, it's all happening and it's all bad!. Also you're getting older and your real income is decreasing!.
HOWEVER, take a step back and realize that the world has been completely going to hell for about 5,000 years!. Black plague!? We got past it Feudalism!? Ditto!. Polio!? The Great Depression!? WWI, WWII, Vietnam!? Got past all of them, and on the whole, our collective standard of living has continued to improve!. Humanity tends to solve, or at least manage to an acceptable degree, all of the problems that confront it sooner or later!.
Next, take time each day to consciously note all of the good things that are happening in your life and in the world as a whole!. Did the Acme project at work go better than expected!? Did you find that Tony Orlando & Dawn CD you misplaced last summer!? Did someone at the gym compliment you on your mad yoga skills!? Was there a news story today about some evil dictator getting overthrown or a new cancer screening technology!? Did 30 Rock get picked up for another season!? You get the idea!.
#3 is to set and achieve small, realistic, managable goals, like training up to run 3 miles, practicing your guitar 20 minutes a day for a whole week, cleaning your garage!.!.!.give yourself the chance to experience positive progress!.
Finally, eat right, get enough sleep and exercise!. The endorphins will boost your optomism instantly, and looking in the mirror and seeing a hardbody is good for one's attitude as well!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
First, pat yourself on the back for recognizing that the world is going completely to hell as we speak!. AIDS, global warming, the energy crisis, reality TV!.!.!.yep, it's all real, it's all happening and it's all bad!. Also you're getting older and your real income is decreasing!.
HOWEVER, take a step back and realize that the world has been completely going to hell for about 5,000 years!. Black plague!? We got past it Feudalism!? Ditto!. Polio!? The Great Depression!? WWI, WWII, Vietnam!? Got past all of them, and on the whole, our collective standard of living has continued to improve!. Humanity tends to solve, or at least manage to an acceptable degree, all of the problems that confront it sooner or later!.
Next, take time each day to consciously note all of the good things that are happening in your life and in the world as a whole!. Did the Acme project at work go better than expected!? Did you find that Tony Orlando & Dawn CD you misplaced last summer!? Did someone at the gym compliment you on your mad yoga skills!? Was there a news story today about some evil dictator getting overthrown or a new cancer screening technology!? Did 30 Rock get picked up for another season!? You get the idea!.
#3 is to set and achieve small, realistic, managable goals, like training up to run 3 miles, practicing your guitar 20 minutes a day for a whole week, cleaning your garage!.!.!.give yourself the chance to experience positive progress!.
Finally, eat right, get enough sleep and exercise!. The endorphins will boost your optomism instantly, and looking in the mirror and seeing a hardbody is good for one's attitude as well!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
What I have learned is that you have to find a way to love yourself first!. Write a list of all the things you find positive about yourself!. Do NOT write anything negative!. Keep that list and read it occasionally and add positive things to it!. Then realize not all people are meant to be your friends, so just try to deal with them as needed!. Find friends that are worthy and that is a good start!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Becoming more optimistic- or less depressed- or happier in your own life- whatever you want to call it- is a process you define for yourself!. A counselor would serve as a sounding board!. Someone to vent your frustrations, offer suggestions, help you set goals!. They aren't going to tell you what to do or how to fix "it" -whatever "it" is!. But they are more objective and will have a fresh lens to look at your situation and see something that maybe you didn't see before!.
If you are concerned a therapist would push you toward medication, a decent therapist would not push the issue!. It is up to you whether you want to take medicine or not!. I rarely recommend it to anyone- I would rather my clients make that decision on their own!. I would only make a recommendation if I felt strongly that they would be in a safer state of mind with it!.
Strategies that you could use on your own!.!.!.journaling!. Write down all of the good things you experienced throughout the day!.
Relaxation techniques, such as tensing and relaxing your muscles, visualizations, etc!.
Turn the negatives into positives!. (Force yourself to think of the glass half full) I do this all the time!. for example, I refer to this little boy I know as a child who enjoys being the youngest in his family!. That's my positive spin on a statement that was made about him being immature for his age!.
Avoid TV- particularly the news, national news to be even more specific!. I find it to be dark and depressing most of the time!. I don't care to watch it!. I want to be informed, but not miserable and hopeless too!.
Stress management groups!? Maybe you have a little too much stress in your life, and that makes it hard for you to be optimistic!.
Keep in mind these are suggestions, not solutions!. You are the expert in your own life and will know if anything I said would work for you!. I don't know you, your history, or exactly what you are going through!.
Hope that helps!. Good luck!Www@Answer-Health@Com
If you are concerned a therapist would push you toward medication, a decent therapist would not push the issue!. It is up to you whether you want to take medicine or not!. I rarely recommend it to anyone- I would rather my clients make that decision on their own!. I would only make a recommendation if I felt strongly that they would be in a safer state of mind with it!.
Strategies that you could use on your own!.!.!.journaling!. Write down all of the good things you experienced throughout the day!.
Relaxation techniques, such as tensing and relaxing your muscles, visualizations, etc!.
Turn the negatives into positives!. (Force yourself to think of the glass half full) I do this all the time!. for example, I refer to this little boy I know as a child who enjoys being the youngest in his family!. That's my positive spin on a statement that was made about him being immature for his age!.
Avoid TV- particularly the news, national news to be even more specific!. I find it to be dark and depressing most of the time!. I don't care to watch it!. I want to be informed, but not miserable and hopeless too!.
Stress management groups!? Maybe you have a little too much stress in your life, and that makes it hard for you to be optimistic!.
Keep in mind these are suggestions, not solutions!. You are the expert in your own life and will know if anything I said would work for you!. I don't know you, your history, or exactly what you are going through!.
Hope that helps!. Good luck!Www@Answer-Health@Com