Had a major argument with my dad now i feel angry and want to destroy him, what !
Question: Had a major argument with my dad now i feel angry and want to destroy him, what should i do !?
my dad i feel has always been controlling and i have always acted subserviant and timid with him and for that i feel inadequete and weak!.!.
ive suffered nothing but torture in my life so far : rejection ( never built up any relationships )!.!.!.!.abuse , bullying!.!.mental abuse!.!.!.assaults !.!.!.head injuries!.!.!.!.time in a psychiatric hospital!.!.!.homelessness!.!.!.sexual abuse!.
i suffer with severe low self esteem all my life!.!.!.!.im 30 now and have borderline personality and ptsd!.!.
my dad is a man of the world and i feel knows alot of people and has lots of influence!.!.
ive always felt paranoid that im being persecuted by people!.!.!.the establishment and society!.!.!.!.the reason for my life has never worked out so far!.!.
and even though i have no proof i feel my dad has been responsible for it!.!.!.!.!.that hes give a perception of me outthere and caused people to ostracize and reject me!.!.
that hes been controling and mapping the way my life goes!.
for example : hes prevented me having a girlfriendWww@Answer-Health@Com
ive suffered nothing but torture in my life so far : rejection ( never built up any relationships )!.!.!.!.abuse , bullying!.!.mental abuse!.!.!.assaults !.!.!.head injuries!.!.!.!.time in a psychiatric hospital!.!.!.homelessness!.!.!.sexual abuse!.
i suffer with severe low self esteem all my life!.!.!.!.im 30 now and have borderline personality and ptsd!.!.
my dad is a man of the world and i feel knows alot of people and has lots of influence!.!.
ive always felt paranoid that im being persecuted by people!.!.!.the establishment and society!.!.!.!.the reason for my life has never worked out so far!.!.
and even though i have no proof i feel my dad has been responsible for it!.!.!.!.!.that hes give a perception of me outthere and caused people to ostracize and reject me!.!.
that hes been controling and mapping the way my life goes!.
for example : hes prevented me having a girlfriendWww@Answer-Health@Com
Answers:
Can a little oak tree grow under a big oak tree!?
No!.!.!.
Emotionally immature men are emotionally immature fathers!. They are unable to be real, supportive fathers to their sons!. Rather they see their sons as siblings they need to compete with!.
This is why such a father sends (subconsciously) a double message to his son: I want you to succeed, I don't want you to succeed!.
This double message brings the son to emotional turmoil, confusion and lack of self confidence!.
1!. Don't contact your father for at least a year!.
2!. Don't blame him for your condition!. Regard it as your karma!.
3!. Don't think people are out there to stop you or harm you - it is your own projection!.
4!. Live day by day!. Praise small improvements!. You are not allowed to think any criticism towards yourself!. You are your greatest asset!.
5!. Be a giver!. Learn to like people in general!. They can feel it!.
6!. Find a job!. Perhaps on a cruise ship or something!. They train you there and you'll be able to move away quickly!.
7!. Socialize with nice people who are supportive and kind!. Ignore others!.
8!. Volunteer at homeless shelter or something!. You'll see there are many less fortunate people than you!. It's good for the soul!. But, it's also a good bait for girls!.
BlessingsWww@Answer-Health@Com
No!.!.!.
Emotionally immature men are emotionally immature fathers!. They are unable to be real, supportive fathers to their sons!. Rather they see their sons as siblings they need to compete with!.
This is why such a father sends (subconsciously) a double message to his son: I want you to succeed, I don't want you to succeed!.
This double message brings the son to emotional turmoil, confusion and lack of self confidence!.
1!. Don't contact your father for at least a year!.
2!. Don't blame him for your condition!. Regard it as your karma!.
3!. Don't think people are out there to stop you or harm you - it is your own projection!.
4!. Live day by day!. Praise small improvements!. You are not allowed to think any criticism towards yourself!. You are your greatest asset!.
5!. Be a giver!. Learn to like people in general!. They can feel it!.
6!. Find a job!. Perhaps on a cruise ship or something!. They train you there and you'll be able to move away quickly!.
7!. Socialize with nice people who are supportive and kind!. Ignore others!.
8!. Volunteer at homeless shelter or something!. You'll see there are many less fortunate people than you!. It's good for the soul!. But, it's also a good bait for girls!.
BlessingsWww@Answer-Health@Com
Relax! get out from the house, go in the park because the green colour of the grass will help you relax!. Don't think for the past, think for the feature to find a part time job just to keep you bessy!. Talk with your mum(!)!. Don't talk with your father in this moment!. Make some friends!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
The best thing to do it cut off all contact with him!. It is for the best and will make you feel a lot more at peace with yourself!. I also have BPD and had the same thing with a family member!. I cut them out of my life and feel a lot better for it!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
both of you need to see a psychiatrist!. there are a lot of unresolved issues that need to be cleared if u ever want to be happy!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Stop being so pathetic!. You're probably some kid with attention issues!. Get over yourself!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Whatever your problems are you need help from professionals not Yahoo! members, this is not the right place to express your anger and fearsWww@Answer-Health@Com
I think you need to seek some kind of help asap before you do something nuts!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Go see a Doc u r goin to need help sooner or later!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Well firstly it's all in your HEAD!.
Please don't do anything your HEART wouldn't want you to do!.
Maybe get some help so you can fix those matters in your mind then you can be happy and follow your heart!.
I really hope things turn out OK for you!.
I know lifes not easy and I just want you to know your not the only person out there!. We're all in this together right !? We can't do EVERYTHING on our own!.
So please get help!. For me !?
Things will be ok in the end!. If its not ok its not the end!.
You will be happy soon ok!. :)Www@Answer-Health@Com
Please don't do anything your HEART wouldn't want you to do!.
Maybe get some help so you can fix those matters in your mind then you can be happy and follow your heart!.
I really hope things turn out OK for you!.
I know lifes not easy and I just want you to know your not the only person out there!. We're all in this together right !? We can't do EVERYTHING on our own!.
So please get help!. For me !?
Things will be ok in the end!. If its not ok its not the end!.
You will be happy soon ok!. :)Www@Answer-Health@Com
You both definately need professional help! I had alot of very severe arguements with my Father as well!. I went to the gym and took out my frustration there!. Threatening violence will get you nothing other than thrown in jail possibly ruining your life forever!. If you don't feel counseling will work it is time to move away and start another life!Www@Answer-Health@Com
I think you need to go for therapy and anger management!. It sounds like you've kept(to yourself) alot of annoying things that your father has being saying and doing to you and it's time to talk about these issues so that you reach the source of your anger!. Once done, you can confront your father(obvisouly in the prescence of a therapist) so that you let all your fury out!.Your anger seems to be a heap of things piled onto one major thing and you need to yank it out before you do something terrible!.Humans are very unpredictable when they lose itWww@Answer-Health@Com
You might blame your father for everything, but I guess he's an easy target!. he was the one authority figure for most of your life and so he's the one you are directing your anger at!.
Ask yourself this: would you still have all your mental health problems if your father was never there!? Is suspect Yes!. Think about it!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Ask yourself this: would you still have all your mental health problems if your father was never there!? Is suspect Yes!. Think about it!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
I think that you've got to ask for help from experts!. This is a really serius situation and I think that this "major" argument is just the edge of the horns!. But try to keep calm and ask for help!!! I wish you the best of luck!. Your father may be a man of the world but he is not a god ; he can't use police or psycologists or anybody else against you!. You are not alone out there!. I'm with you and I hope you can figure a way out!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
you no what i feel sorry for you!. ITS his fault but you cant blame him for it !. he is just trying to protect you and although that may be annoying it could prevent you from one day making the biggest mistake of your life!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
you may think i,m crazy but i think you better ignore him don't call him don't keep in touch with him or what so ever!. and at the age of 30 you still alive after all what has been happening in your life it not too late to start afresh and tell yourself you can do it!. it happened to me with my mother all my life i decided to leave home and start a new life for myself now i,m 26 now i call her send presents on special days!. she wants me now but i,m not ready to go back!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
If you have a long history of "mental" problems, and you have a CPN or councellor, try phoning them and making an appointment to see them as a matter of urgency!. The know more about you, and are probably better qualified to be able to help with your intense feelings at the moment!. If you have neither of those at this present time, make an urgent appointment with your G!.P!., he/she should be able to be of some assistance, whether it be by giving you some form of medication, or getting in contact with someone who can help you more!.
I do not know you, and do not know your father, and therefore are not in a position to be able to say whether all or any of your problems are his fault or not, but what is clear, from where I'm sitting, is that you are a very angry, hurt, scared and resentful young man, that clearly needs professional help!. Please, please try and get it before your emotions take over and you may do something you live to regret for the rest of your life!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
I do not know you, and do not know your father, and therefore are not in a position to be able to say whether all or any of your problems are his fault or not, but what is clear, from where I'm sitting, is that you are a very angry, hurt, scared and resentful young man, that clearly needs professional help!. Please, please try and get it before your emotions take over and you may do something you live to regret for the rest of your life!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Don't bottle it up, I got so mad with my dad I cut him out my life for the best of five years then got so mad with him I literally did think I was going to murder him!.
It all came to blows on epic proportions and we've been ok since, but we still have our moments when he criticises me or Say's ridiculous stupid and judgemental things!.
It's all fair and well that your dad's destroyed your life but you need to stop passing the blame, acknowledge that no-ones perfect and move on!. It sounds like you live with him too, move out, nothings worse than your fear and anticipation, what you're scared of is the worst you can feel, use it as a benchmark to make every moment better!.
Hats off though, Id have nodoubt killed him by now, but trust me I know what it's like to have a completely ****** up family, you need to give yourself tough love and move the hell on, Im not gonna sugar coat it for you, the relationship is probably always going to suck - be the better person here!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
It all came to blows on epic proportions and we've been ok since, but we still have our moments when he criticises me or Say's ridiculous stupid and judgemental things!.
It's all fair and well that your dad's destroyed your life but you need to stop passing the blame, acknowledge that no-ones perfect and move on!. It sounds like you live with him too, move out, nothings worse than your fear and anticipation, what you're scared of is the worst you can feel, use it as a benchmark to make every moment better!.
Hats off though, Id have nodoubt killed him by now, but trust me I know what it's like to have a completely ****** up family, you need to give yourself tough love and move the hell on, Im not gonna sugar coat it for you, the relationship is probably always going to suck - be the better person here!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
A lot of what you are feeling can be helped with the right medications and counseling!.
You stated that the reason for your life has never worked out so far!. I assume you are trying to say that your life is not turning out how you wanted!.
A person's personality, fears, strengths, weaknesses, self esteem, etc!. has a lot to do with how their parents raised them!. For example, if as a child you were constantly criticized by your father and nothing you could do was ever good enough for him, then you will carry into your adulthood those feelings of inadequacy or never being good enough, for anything or anybody, not just your father!. Or, for example, if a child is constantly told by a parent that he/she is stupid, that child will become an adult who believes he/she is stupid!. Because there is nobody telling you otherwise!.
You can't blame everything on your dad; some things you are responsible for!. I suggest you take some time and begin to evaluate your life, the things you do, the emotions you feel, the actions you may take or your reactions to certain things or occurrences!. Then ask yourself why you reacted that way or why did you feel that way!. If you have low self esteem now, is it because you never received any positive praise as a child!? If it is, then you can begin to change how you feel about yourself!. If you really believe you are smart, for example, don't let how someone else may feel about you change how you feel about yourself!. What matters is how you feel or what you think about yourself!. Change those things in your life that you can change!. For the other things not so easily changed, seek help from others!.
Good luck!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
You stated that the reason for your life has never worked out so far!. I assume you are trying to say that your life is not turning out how you wanted!.
A person's personality, fears, strengths, weaknesses, self esteem, etc!. has a lot to do with how their parents raised them!. For example, if as a child you were constantly criticized by your father and nothing you could do was ever good enough for him, then you will carry into your adulthood those feelings of inadequacy or never being good enough, for anything or anybody, not just your father!. Or, for example, if a child is constantly told by a parent that he/she is stupid, that child will become an adult who believes he/she is stupid!. Because there is nobody telling you otherwise!.
You can't blame everything on your dad; some things you are responsible for!. I suggest you take some time and begin to evaluate your life, the things you do, the emotions you feel, the actions you may take or your reactions to certain things or occurrences!. Then ask yourself why you reacted that way or why did you feel that way!. If you have low self esteem now, is it because you never received any positive praise as a child!? If it is, then you can begin to change how you feel about yourself!. If you really believe you are smart, for example, don't let how someone else may feel about you change how you feel about yourself!. What matters is how you feel or what you think about yourself!. Change those things in your life that you can change!. For the other things not so easily changed, seek help from others!.
Good luck!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
You know, if he is causing you so much anguish, you could cut off all relations with him until you are feeling more in control of your emotions!. There is help out there!. You are a free person and do not ever have to answer to him for anything!. You are not a child anymore!. I would recommend moving further away and getting some counseling!. If you need help and don't want couseling try www!.newlife!.com or www!.hopefortheheart!.org You don't have to take it from him anymore and there is no reason for violence!. Just cut ties!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
i know your goin think wtf: but seriously
smoke weeeed: you will feel sooo much beetter i promiseWww@Answer-Health@Com
smoke weeeed: you will feel sooo much beetter i promiseWww@Answer-Health@Com