Why am so afraid?!
Question: Why am so afraid!?
I don't understand this at all!. I am engaged, and I love my fiancee with all my heart!. We will be married in October!. I keep feeling afraid that my mental issues are going to drive him away!. He says that won't happen but I'm still afraid!. Is it just my borderline personality disorder !? I guess I fear that if I have to be hospitalized yet again, he'll leave me!. again, could this just be my BPD!? I am not afraid of marriage at all!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Answers:
Perhaps, you have the fear of losing your fiancee and the fear of relapse of your past mental illness!. Life is tough, and we have to cope with past failures, illnesses and hopes and dreams being fulfilled and dashed!.
Think of the positive, that you will not be hospitalised and you will not have a relapse!. Visualise a happy marriage whereby both of you are healthy and productive!.
Those who are in remission of mental illness always have to cope with a fear of relapse!. So take care of yourself!. You know your own body, your symptoms!. So take note of the signals that your body sends to you and minimise change and stress!.
May God bless you with a good and blissful marriage!. No, I don't think your fiancee will abandon you!. You know his heart!. You know him!.
You can find a marriage counsellor or some other trained counsellor to voice out your fears!.
Life is uncertain, and just hope for the best in the future!. God has good plans for you and your future!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Think of the positive, that you will not be hospitalised and you will not have a relapse!. Visualise a happy marriage whereby both of you are healthy and productive!.
Those who are in remission of mental illness always have to cope with a fear of relapse!. So take care of yourself!. You know your own body, your symptoms!. So take note of the signals that your body sends to you and minimise change and stress!.
May God bless you with a good and blissful marriage!. No, I don't think your fiancee will abandon you!. You know his heart!. You know him!.
You can find a marriage counsellor or some other trained counsellor to voice out your fears!.
Life is uncertain, and just hope for the best in the future!. God has good plans for you and your future!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
I hope you are seeing a clinician who specializes in DBT counseling!. And I hope you have already attended at least two rounds of DBT training (Dialectical Behavior Therapy -- created by Marsha Linehan, specifically for people with BPD)!. These skills will help keep you out of the hospital and will help you navigate complex relationships and interactions!. This could very well be your BPD at work: I'll leave him (drive him away) before he abandons me!. I'll self-sabotage and get myself hospitalized so he'll abandon me and then I can be the victim (sorry to put it harshly, but that may be the psychological underpinning)!. OR, this could very well be a normal, human reaction that most brides-to-be go through!. Let's get real!. Weddings are stressful!. Engagements are stressful!. Any reasonable woman is going to have anxious thoughts, reservations, and worries!. Remember that not everything is your BPD!. Some stuff is just normal!. But, again, I hope you have someone impartial (i!.e!. a therapist) to discuss this more with!. And I hope you get some DBT skills under your belt for good measure!. Best of luck to you! And congratulations on your engagement!Www@Answer-Health@Com
It would be a less healthy sign if the impact of BPD was not a concern for you at all!. If he's aware of your struggles and efforts to become healthier, if you've clued him in on what may be down the road and he says "I'm okay with this, I love you and want to marry you", trust him, even if you don't trust yourself completely right now!.
His love might be an important part of stabilizing your health!. If you keep yammering on to him about all this fear and driving him away, he's going to feel you aren't taking in what he is saying!.
Doing good things the right way are self-reinforcing!.
Hope you have a smooth, beautiful wedding!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
His love might be an important part of stabilizing your health!. If you keep yammering on to him about all this fear and driving him away, he's going to feel you aren't taking in what he is saying!.
Doing good things the right way are self-reinforcing!.
Hope you have a smooth, beautiful wedding!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Although it is typical of Borderline, it is also a valid fear!. Has he been there, through any of your "bouts"!? How long have you been together!? This should answer your question right there!. Just make sure you don't miniize your disorder and try to hide it, you need to know if he is really strong enough to be your man!. Don't maximize it by pushing him away either!. Be yourself-wholeheartedly!. God Bless!Www@Answer-Health@Com
Hon, i think you will do just fine!.
If you have BPD then you know you need to keep working on yourself, for YOU!.!.!.!. so, continue seeing your health professionals, and especially when you're having a hard time!.!.!. that's my best advice!.
you are fortunate to have met someone you love,
congratulations on your upcoming marriage!Www@Answer-Health@Com
If you have BPD then you know you need to keep working on yourself, for YOU!.!.!.!. so, continue seeing your health professionals, and especially when you're having a hard time!.!.!. that's my best advice!.
you are fortunate to have met someone you love,
congratulations on your upcoming marriage!Www@Answer-Health@Com
im afraid my issues will drive the person i love away too!. im sure they won't mind and will be there for me but part of me is still a little nervous!. i think thats just a normal thing we have to deal with!. just have faith in him and everything!. good luck and feel betterWww@Answer-Health@Com