What am i doing here?!


Question: What am i doing here!?
I always get this really weird feeling that something big is going to happen to me!. Ive had this feeling for a while now but i feel as though it will happen very soon!. im not sure if it will be bad or good!? i also feel as though i should be doing someting else in life other then what im doing!. I mean im in college and working two jobs but i feel as though thats not good enough and i could be doing better!? im just not sure what i should be doing or where i should be going with my life!? who can help me!?Www@Answer-Health@Com


Answers:
Ive planned many things in my life, and not one thing went the way I'd planned!.

i was always a bad student, i got lots of C's and C-!. but then when I was 15, I decided I wanna get myself together and tried very hard in school!. I wanna become a biologist, or maybe a dentist!. that year, I studied hard, woke up very early every morning and went to my teacher for extra tutoring!. that year I got almost straight A's!.

had 2 more years in high school and i had my mind set on excelling the rest of the way!.!.!., then my stupid father moved me to alberta!. new school, new province/city, new everything!. i couldnt handle the change, and my grades were like C's again!. anyway, i missed my old home in vancouver, i just wanted to go home!. day/night i just dreamed of graduating and going back home and going to college!. so I summoned some motivation, and studied hard again!. in those 2 years I was obsessed with vancouver, I made myself believe the city was perfect and that alberta was ****!. so I graduated with a B average!.!.!. got accepted into a college in vancouver, and moved back!.

first night there, I was like!.!.!.!. ok this wasnt what i expected, this sucks! I think what went wrong was, while i was in alberta for 2 years, I made up this fantasy land in my mind, i convinced myself that alberta was ****, and vancouver was perfect!. for so long Ive had this false idea in my mind!. and when I came back I found both were ****, I was distraught and angry!. I quit college, and just lived off my student loans cause i was depressed and questioned god why I cant just be happy!.

I got a job a few months later, and was working at a fast food!. i hated it pretty bad, and looked for something better!. I fell victim to some online job scams and went broke!. I decided I wanna go back to college again, and applied, got accepted!. ok!.!. but because my stupid previous loans got defaulted, I only got half of what I needed!. (sorry for the long post, ill wrap it up) long story short, went thru half the semester and ran out of money, and dropped out again!. worked through a bunch of crappy jobs, manual labour, warehouse, back kitchen, more fast food, you name it!.!. I hated it so much I quit each place within the first week!.

and soon I was pretty much rock bottom, I had no money for food!. I remember i still had some $10 supermarket gift certificates from my birthday and I was living off of those!. I felt like a bum, i couldnt even pay my phone bill!. there was this one time where I was buying groceries, the total came to $10!.50, I only had the $10 certificate, so I took off one item, the total came to $8!.!.!. I get the cashier the certificate and she told me the store doesnt accept certificates unless its exactly $10 or more!. I remember her helping me!.!.!. she ripped some bananas away one by one, trying to get it to weigh a certain weight so it'd cost closer to $10!. finally I've had enough I just said "just hold on, I'll go get cash from the atm"!.!.!. I never went back, I'll never forget that day i went home cryin!. I was 3 weeks away from being homeless!. so I planned my suicide to just end it!. but soon after I got a credit card with a limit of $5000, for some reason, I dont know why i got that, but i was so freakin happy, i got out and ate a big meal that night!.

went back to school for the 3rd time, finally had enough student loans to cover everything!. but then I failed too many subjects and had to drop out the 3rd time!. I felt worthless and was broke again soon after!. I wasnt going back to manual labor jobs, no way!. I planned on suffocating myself, or deprive from eating/drinking to end my life!. then my cousin got me into
this security guard job just in time, cause a month later i wouldve gone thru with the suicide!. this job is easy enough, so ive been doing this for 10 months now!. i never again got so broke i couldnt afford food!.!.!.

and currently I "Plan" on saving money, going back to school, and finally graduating and getting a real job!. but then again, nothing I plan ever goes right!. so Im starting to care less and less about my plans!. If I wanna do something I'd just do it and worry bout it later!. cause later i might not be around!.!. so this might be the last chance I get to do itWww@Answer-Health@Com

Sounds like someone has confused you and expected too much of you as you were growing up!. There is a book called "I could do anything If I only knew what it was" by Barbara Sher!. Subtitled "Discover what you really want-and how to get it"!. Published by Hodder at about $20 I think!. (paperback) Good luck!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

alot of people want to be doing somthing else in thier life

as for a "feeling that somthing is going to happen" isnt realy possible

u should think about what you ultamatly want from life and the work out what u need to do to get thereWww@Answer-Health@Com

well you're in control of your own destiny!. so if you feel strongly about something big happening soon, it is up to you for it to happen!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

http://thesecret!.tv/movie/trailer!.htmlWww@Answer-Health@Com

this is just god tapping you on your shoulder trying to get your attentionWww@Answer-Health@Com





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