How can i let things go?!


Question: How can i let things go!?
i tend to beat myself up over things that are meaningless and stupid!. today, my almost mother-in-law said she was tired of me interferring in her family but i don't interfere at all!. regardless, i feel really bad and worthless just because someone has a problem with me!. how can i let it go!? i just want to live my life for myself, not other people!.Www@Answer-Health@Com


Answers:
It's tough!. You are 'playing those tapes' over and over; as other posters mentioned, it's time to stop them!.
I, too, lived my life taking care of my parents (they were ill and I cared for them while they were ill and then passed)!. I still caretake; it's part of who I am!. However, being in a support group as well as therapy has made me realize that if I do NOT live for myself as well then I cannot be a complete person!. How can I help others if I cannot help myself!?

Another poster quoted Eleanor Roosevelt: No one can make you inferior without your permission!. Take this to heart and think about getting yourself some support where you can talk things out and start getting kudos for YOU!

Good luck to you!Www@Answer-Health@Com

Sometimes it is from depression or a chemical imbalance that keeps the intrusive thoughts and self worthlessness!. Sometimes it is your self esteem!. Try doing things for others to make yourself feel good, try to stay away from people that cause you to feel bad about yourself!.
Read some self help books!.
If you get more depressed see your doctor!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

You are living in the past!. Have you ever noticed every time you begin feeling bad about yourself you are thinking about the past or dreaded future!. Catch yourself doing that then shift your thoughts to the present!. In reality there is no past nor future just now!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

You need to boost your selfconfidence!. She is a bad mother-in-law unless you are really budding in too much!. When you find the good things about you next time you get insulted, you'll just stare at them like they're idiots!. Egos aren't always a bad thing!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

Your longest serving president's wife once said: No one can make you feel inferior without your permission!.

It's hard when you care !.!.!. you could tell your husband-to-be to set his mother straight or you will!.
Maybe he hasn't seen the part of you that you keep covered !.!.!. yet!.

Picture yourself in a few years time with a daughter whose prospective mother-in-law treats her like crap - what wouldn't YOU do to protect her!.
EVERY woman is a lioness when it comes to protecting her own - find the lioness within!.
If you don't you may as well get 'divorced' now cos you're volunteering for a life of CRAP and you'll finish up killing the wrong person !.!.!. you!.

Isn't it amazing the mother-in-law wasn't too uncomfortable!?
Nip it in the bud girl or wear it!.
~Www@Answer-Health@Com

Geez, I used to do this all the time!. ALL the time!. I obsessed over everything!.

All I can tell you is: DON'T THINK ABOUT IT!. The way I do it is I turn up the song in my head, focus all mental energy on a picture or a sound, and keep repeating the mantra "it doesn't matter, it's not important" over and over!. Eventually this seeped in and I don't obsess anymore!.

Also, I found that when I was obsessing, I was pretty bored with my life!. As soon as I got involved in clubs, etc!., with other people and new obligations and responsibilties, I had no time or energy to obsess!. That helped a lot!Www@Answer-Health@Com

We all know impossible people!. They tend to share three main characteristics: They cannot be reasoned with, they believe they can do no wrong, and they are convinced that everything is someone else's fault!. If you haven't had some first-hand experience in dealing with such people, even a brief conversation can raise your blood pressure through the roof!. These people may also be known to some as narcissists!.

Forgiving someone who has hurt you deeply will probably be one of the hardest things you will ever do!. The freedom you will experience when you do finally forgive will be worth all the pain and effort it requires! Ultimately, offering true forgiveness cannot be accomplished without outside help!.!.!. and that help has to come from God, who is the prime example of Forgiveness!

*Acknowledge that you are as imperfect a person as the one who has hurt you!. You too are in need of being forgiven by people you might have hurt in some way!. You too need forgiveness from a perfect God!. That puts you on the same level with the perpetrator!.
*Try to understand the perpetrator; ask yourself what kind of suffering has occurred in his/her life; what kind of struggles has this person gone through that has made her hurt you so badly!. Perhaps this person was abused at some point in his or her life!.
*Recognize that as long as you stay angry at this person, he or she will have power over you!. Your perpetrator might long have forgotten the injury inflicted on you, while you are allowing anger to seep the life out of you!.
*Ask God to help you in this process!. Think of the forgiveness He offers you through His son, Jesus!.!.!. a totally free gift, which neither you nor I deserve! He asks us to pass this forgviness on to our fellow human beings; not an easy task, yet He asks it of us and He knows that if we do that, we will find incredible peace and freedom!
*Forego any desire for revenge!. It is God's domain!. Only He knows what this person actually deserves!. Inflicting revenge will only make you feel better for a fleeting moment!. Ultimately, it will make you feel much worse!.

*Realize that you might have to forgive your perpetrator more than once! Sometimes you need to make a conscious decision to forgive on a daily basis!. Realize too, that you forgive with your will and not with your emotions!. You will not necessarily be relieved of the pain you are experiencing, but you will have a great deal of peace and even self-respect when you are able to let go and release the perpetrator!.
*Fun little tip: when someone is mean to you, see it as the devil, for that moment, gets a hold of them and uses them as a tool to get to you!. So the person isn't bad, its just the meany-headed devil!.Www@Answer-Health@Com





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