I think I have anxiety problems?!
Question: I think I have anxiety problems!?
Ok, to start off I'll tell you everything that's happened!. I feel that the closest friend to me has let me down, all she does is lecture me, and tell me what I can and cannot do, yet what I can't do, she does! All she does is bring me down!. Her and my Family talked me out of doing something I wanted to do, and I felt so isolated!. Also, with my Partner I've been with for over a year, alot has kicked off!. We used to argue, his ex came back on the scene saying they were still together, I was so ****** up as he'd lied to me!.!. I went and got wasted and slept with someone!. He found out recently, made my life hell for a week, then wanted a 3sum so we were 'even'!. I went through with it, and felt so hurt watching him sleep with another girl in our bed!. He now wants another one!. I'd had enough and went to leave him, and he begged me to stay promising me everything I wanted - Marriage, a baby, a life!.
I think I'm suffering from all this as!.!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
I think I'm suffering from all this as!.!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Answers:
Firstly sorry to hear you're suffering so bad right now!.
Your friend sounds like a toxic friend!. I would try and slowly phase in more positive friendships!. Start hanging around people that make you feel good!. After you've socialised with someone just make a mental note of how they (or a particular group) made you feel!. Did you feel emotionally lifted or emotionally drained!? My advice is to avoid emotional drainers (or leeches) at ALL costs!. These are toxic people!. If a good friend is having a bad day, then of course that doesn't count!. It's more if it happens all the time!.
Also your boyfriend has abused your trust, and it sounds like he emotionally manipulated you in to a threesome when you didn't want to!. So you now feel traumatised by seeing him sleep with another girl, this is completely normal!.
All your feelings seem normal based on how people have treated you!. I would start looking for more positive people!. Maybe see a therapist and learn about setting boundaries (i!.e!. assertiveness), and only do what you feel comfortable with, don't let people persuade you if deep down you aren't happy about something!.
Also your bf sounds like he's manipulating you again talking about marriage, baby etc!.!.!. He is just telling you that, do you really want to be married to someone that wants threesomes when you're married!!? If that is a lifestyle you want then fine, but just think about it!. Once a cheater always a cheater is something to think about!.
You are a good person and you deserve to be treated nicely and considerately!. Find people who will treat you this way, this goes for friends and boyfriends!.
Re your depression, I'd see a therapist so you can learn some coping strategies!.
Email me if you need extra input because I have suffered in similar ways before!. I can't give you therapy of course, but I can give you more pointers if you feel you need it!.
Good luck :)Www@Answer-Health@Com
Your friend sounds like a toxic friend!. I would try and slowly phase in more positive friendships!. Start hanging around people that make you feel good!. After you've socialised with someone just make a mental note of how they (or a particular group) made you feel!. Did you feel emotionally lifted or emotionally drained!? My advice is to avoid emotional drainers (or leeches) at ALL costs!. These are toxic people!. If a good friend is having a bad day, then of course that doesn't count!. It's more if it happens all the time!.
Also your boyfriend has abused your trust, and it sounds like he emotionally manipulated you in to a threesome when you didn't want to!. So you now feel traumatised by seeing him sleep with another girl, this is completely normal!.
All your feelings seem normal based on how people have treated you!. I would start looking for more positive people!. Maybe see a therapist and learn about setting boundaries (i!.e!. assertiveness), and only do what you feel comfortable with, don't let people persuade you if deep down you aren't happy about something!.
Also your bf sounds like he's manipulating you again talking about marriage, baby etc!.!.!. He is just telling you that, do you really want to be married to someone that wants threesomes when you're married!!? If that is a lifestyle you want then fine, but just think about it!. Once a cheater always a cheater is something to think about!.
You are a good person and you deserve to be treated nicely and considerately!. Find people who will treat you this way, this goes for friends and boyfriends!.
Re your depression, I'd see a therapist so you can learn some coping strategies!.
Email me if you need extra input because I have suffered in similar ways before!. I can't give you therapy of course, but I can give you more pointers if you feel you need it!.
Good luck :)Www@Answer-Health@Com
Get the hell out of that relationship and be alone for a year!. You need to leave this guy now!. Run don't walk!. I know you were wrong and he made you suffer by doing what he did!. It is sick what is going on in this thing!. Get out of this thing please!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
you are definitely depress ins ted of wanting a marriage,baby and all that!. dump your boy, do not listen to you "friend" and get some therapy soon please you are a ticking boomWww@Answer-Health@Com
You need some time out, to clear you head and make some choices!. Follow your intuition!.
Wishing you well!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Wishing you well!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
I'm sorry you are having such a tough time right now!. Sometimes life sucks!. I would say you should find a good therapist -- I think a good therapist is so incredibly valuable!. I don't see how so many people make it through life without one!. A really excellent one is not easy to find!. Don't settle for someone who is just plain okay (there are some bad ones and some useless ones out there too so, be on the look out) but, try to find someone who makes you feel like you can trust them and whom you feel easily comfortable with and connected to!. Be sure to find someone who has some wisdom to share as well!. Once you've got this person in your life -- never let them go!. You can have a long term professional relationship with a therapist and they can help you thorughout your life!. I would recommend a woman (not a man) but, that's just my own bias!. Again, I'm sorry you are having a tough time right now and i know that this "solution" is more long term than a quick fix but I really do feel like it's an incredible gift!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
You've made a successful step towards getting better by calling a doctor!. A couple of the things you described were signs of depression!. And then obviously theres some anxiety in there too with the racing heart and what not!. When you talk to your doctor ask for a few names for psychiatrists and counselors!. The counselor is really important because they can help sort everything out for you as far as the immediate problems in your life but it will still be difficult before it gets better!. Good luck and I hope everything works out for you!Www@Answer-Health@Com
He's screwed with your head!. Get the hell away from him!. The first love is always the hardest!. He's messed with you real bad!. You need to see a therapist!. They don't pass judgement on you!. They help you figure out what you want!. I feel bad for you!. He wants you to come back so he can screw with your head all you want!. He doesn't respect or love you!. He just wants to mess with you!. He's psychologically abusing you!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Hey hun,
I would say you are suffering from a mixture of anxiety and depression, which is a common mixture!.
You would benefit from some short term intensive drug treatment, but only whilst therapy that you should request from the doctor on tuesday starts working!.
Drug therapy is a quick fix, and will not get to the route cause of the problem!. And inevitably, we all have to come off drugs sooner or later, and then the depression/anxiety will return!.
For starters, you are so young, you are the same age as me, and right now, i wouldn't be thinking about marriage!.!.!.babies or any of that!!
As well as this, this man has disrespected you!. Let us not forget that he made the first mistake!. And then he used your mistake, which isn't as bad as his mistake, to get what he wants from you, which was a three some!.
Any man who asks his girlfriend to watch him have sex with another woman is not worth being with!.
This relationship will never work in the long term hun!. and would you want to ever bring a child into this!?!
You have to be realistic, and be sure that in 20, 30 years time, you will still be together!. And that is a LONG time!.
If i were you, i would leave him, go back to your mums so you have moral support - then get the treatment you need for anxiety and depression - a mixture of drug and psychotherapy such as CBT, and get better!
Then, find the man of your dreams!. But first, satisfy what you want, before you ever satisfy what a man wants!.
You have to be happy alone, before you'll be happy with someone new :)Www@Answer-Health@Com
I would say you are suffering from a mixture of anxiety and depression, which is a common mixture!.
You would benefit from some short term intensive drug treatment, but only whilst therapy that you should request from the doctor on tuesday starts working!.
Drug therapy is a quick fix, and will not get to the route cause of the problem!. And inevitably, we all have to come off drugs sooner or later, and then the depression/anxiety will return!.
For starters, you are so young, you are the same age as me, and right now, i wouldn't be thinking about marriage!.!.!.babies or any of that!!
As well as this, this man has disrespected you!. Let us not forget that he made the first mistake!. And then he used your mistake, which isn't as bad as his mistake, to get what he wants from you, which was a three some!.
Any man who asks his girlfriend to watch him have sex with another woman is not worth being with!.
This relationship will never work in the long term hun!. and would you want to ever bring a child into this!?!
You have to be realistic, and be sure that in 20, 30 years time, you will still be together!. And that is a LONG time!.
If i were you, i would leave him, go back to your mums so you have moral support - then get the treatment you need for anxiety and depression - a mixture of drug and psychotherapy such as CBT, and get better!
Then, find the man of your dreams!. But first, satisfy what you want, before you ever satisfy what a man wants!.
You have to be happy alone, before you'll be happy with someone new :)Www@Answer-Health@Com
i would not call it anxiety
but i think you made some wrong choices
sounds to me your lucky you are no longer with the guy
you would not want to have a marriage or baby with him
enjoy being with your mom
have some good talks with her
take some time off before going into another relationship
give it some time to find someone new, maybe someone nicer
and take care of yourself with healthy food , plenty of rest
take careWww@Answer-Health@Com
but i think you made some wrong choices
sounds to me your lucky you are no longer with the guy
you would not want to have a marriage or baby with him
enjoy being with your mom
have some good talks with her
take some time off before going into another relationship
give it some time to find someone new, maybe someone nicer
and take care of yourself with healthy food , plenty of rest
take careWww@Answer-Health@Com
hi there,i think you might have depression!.with all these many things happen in your life so that's why you have depression!.it's good that you know you need to see a doctor for help!.and about the thing with your bf you need to think about it !.wish you all the best!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
View the techniques for control of panic attacks, in section 8, in my website, at ezy build, below, which I created to contain all the information that there isn't enough space for, here!. Begin, on this first occasion, only, by holding your breath for 5, or 10 seconds: this will give you the confidence to realise that YOU CAN CONTROL YOUR BREATHING, but not pass out, or die (your autonomic nervous system resumes breathing, if you become unconscious)!. Understand panic attacks, and what triggers them, in your life (if it is unresolved anxiety, or stress, see sections 6, or 42, respectively)!. The paper bag method works for most people: try it!.
If you are fairly suggestible, the following are reliable: http://www!.hypnosisdownloads!.com/
Your last alternative is psychotherapy, to address its fundamental cause: read section 1, and examine the http://1-800-therapist!.com/ website, and use the locators, and phone book!. I used to suffer from panic attacks, until I questioned what had changed in my life, at, or just before that time, to trigger them!. For some people, this is enough!. These days, I have instilled the habit of, whenever a situation occurs where panic is likely, I visualise a large, "STOP!" sign, as vividly as possible, followed by repeating to myself: "stay calm" in my mind!. You could try the same method!. It usually takes 30 - 40 repetitions, for most people, to establish a new habit!. I also suggest that you learn, then practise the controlled breathing technique, until competent, then employ it, at the very first sign of a panic attack!.
Practice one of the relaxation methods on pages 2, 11, 2c, or 2i, daily, and when needed!. Also, give the EFT a good tryout, to see if it helps you!. There is also a version for use in public places, (if you like, you can claim to have a headache, as you massage/lightly tap your temples, but you would then be restricted to subvocalising: saying it to yourself in your mind)!. Section 53, and pages 2, 2!.q and 2!.o at http://www!.ezy-build!.net!.nz/~shaneris also refer: "Even though I sometimes suffer from panic attacks, I deeply and completely accept myself!." Note: the controlled breathing only helps with the symptoms (as do medications/herbal remedies): you need to address the underlying cause, and this requires some form of therapy, and Cognitive Behavio(u)ral Therapy has proved effective!.
Advice from a published psychiatrist on controlled breathing!. (1!.) Get a clock, or watch with a second timer!. (2!.) Practise for 5 minutes, 4 times daily, until proficient!. (3!.) Take a small breath in, and hold it, for 6 seconds!. (4!.) Think to yourself: "RELAX", just before breathing out!. (5!.) Try to feel a sense of releasing tension, as you breathe out!. (6!.) Breathe in for 3 seconds, then out, for 3 seconds!. Try to make your breathing very smooth, and light, as you breathe in through your nose, and out through your mouth, or nose!. (7!.) For the next minute, continue to breathe in, and out, every 3 seconds!. (8!.) Go back to step 3, at the end of the minute, and proceed through to step 7, doing this for 5 minutes!. Use this at the very first sign of a panic attack starting, or any time you feel anxious, or tense!.
Because many people can't access/afford professional therapy, I include the EFT, and EMDR variant for them to try, free of charge!. Cognitive Behavio(u)ral Therapy is generally available in most areas, but EMDR (see section 33) may well be worth trying, and is becoming more widespread!. (The following is a variant of EMDR therapy, which has been used successfully for those people suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, insomnia, and anxiety: it is easily learned, quick to use, yet can be very effective!. It is currently the subject of much study by neuroscientists, to discover how it works!. Don't dismiss it, merely because it seems a little strange: give it a tryout!)!. Prior to using either of the methods in the above paragraph, or using it on its own, first sit comfortably, and take a deep breath!.
Then, without moving your head, move your eyes from the left, to the right, and back again, taking around a second to do so (say: a thousand and one: this takes approximately a second)!. Repeat this procedure (without the words, although you can count, subvocally if you like) 20 times!. Then close your eyes and relax!. Become aware of any tension or discomfort you feel!. Then open your eyes, and take another deep breath, and repeat step one, closing your eyes, and relaxing afterwards, in the same manner!. Then, repeat the procedure one last time!. Some people may find that this is all they need do!. With experience, you may find that you can practise this in public, with your eyes closed, which greatly widens the window of opportunity for its use, and avoids attracting unwanted attention!.
It may also help to minimise, or eliminate caffeine products from your life (coffee can be a trigger) and sugar!. Xylitol, or Stevia is preferable, (health food stores) or fruit sugar (fructose, such as "Fruisana", from supermarket sugar aisles) or even a little honey!. Minimise/eliminate consumption of highly processed foods, particularly grain products, such as white bread, donuts, cake, cookies/biscuits, or anything with sugar!. Opt for more wholefoods, non-starchy vegetables, and fruit!.
INSOMNIA: Put your mind in a position where it wants to shut itself off, and sleep!. See insomnia treatments, in much more detail than can be included here, in section 3, at ezy build, below!. Use one of the relaxation methods, in bed, after lights out, on pages 2, 11, 2!.c, or 2!.i, but they can take some time to learn, (progressive muscular relaxation excepted) so learn and become proficient in their use during the day; an alternative is to use the EFT, in section 53, and pages 2!.q, and 2!.o, saying to yourself: "Even though I currently have a sleep disorder, I deeply and completely accept myself!." (or choose your own wording) while you use the acupressure tapping!. Some more; quick, and easy to learn, are at http://www!.umm!.edu/sleep/relax_tech!.htm I have not yet evaluated them, but they seem to be worthwhile trying, and I like to provide options!. Use the EMDR prior to the relaxation methods!.
I have a cup of chamomile herbal tea, an hour before bedtime, and use the above techniques, after lights out!. Others may prefer Sleepytime, by Celestial Seasonings, or valerian root, from supermarket tea, or health food aisles!.
Alcohol interferes with sleep, and more than 2 drinks daily acts as a depressant!. You may have depression: take the quiz via sections 1, & 2, (see page Z!.13 next) at ezy build!. "If you don't want someone to do something, get them to talk about it"!. Do what YOU WANT to do, or you will regret it, later!. Ask yourself if a man who has lied and manipulated you with guilt; "playing you", is the man you want to father your child, and what sort of a husband would he be!? He is unlikely to change!
RELATIONSHIPS: go to http://www!.relationshiptalk!.net/forums/a!.!.!. and http://www!.relationshipweb!.com and http://www!.relationship-affairs!.com/your!.!.!. and BOARDS, at http://www!.mental-health-today!.com/ptsd/!.!.!. and http://www!.kasamba!.com/ may be worth a look as well!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
If you are fairly suggestible, the following are reliable: http://www!.hypnosisdownloads!.com/
Your last alternative is psychotherapy, to address its fundamental cause: read section 1, and examine the http://1-800-therapist!.com/ website, and use the locators, and phone book!. I used to suffer from panic attacks, until I questioned what had changed in my life, at, or just before that time, to trigger them!. For some people, this is enough!. These days, I have instilled the habit of, whenever a situation occurs where panic is likely, I visualise a large, "STOP!" sign, as vividly as possible, followed by repeating to myself: "stay calm" in my mind!. You could try the same method!. It usually takes 30 - 40 repetitions, for most people, to establish a new habit!. I also suggest that you learn, then practise the controlled breathing technique, until competent, then employ it, at the very first sign of a panic attack!.
Practice one of the relaxation methods on pages 2, 11, 2c, or 2i, daily, and when needed!. Also, give the EFT a good tryout, to see if it helps you!. There is also a version for use in public places, (if you like, you can claim to have a headache, as you massage/lightly tap your temples, but you would then be restricted to subvocalising: saying it to yourself in your mind)!. Section 53, and pages 2, 2!.q and 2!.o at http://www!.ezy-build!.net!.nz/~shaneris also refer: "Even though I sometimes suffer from panic attacks, I deeply and completely accept myself!." Note: the controlled breathing only helps with the symptoms (as do medications/herbal remedies): you need to address the underlying cause, and this requires some form of therapy, and Cognitive Behavio(u)ral Therapy has proved effective!.
Advice from a published psychiatrist on controlled breathing!. (1!.) Get a clock, or watch with a second timer!. (2!.) Practise for 5 minutes, 4 times daily, until proficient!. (3!.) Take a small breath in, and hold it, for 6 seconds!. (4!.) Think to yourself: "RELAX", just before breathing out!. (5!.) Try to feel a sense of releasing tension, as you breathe out!. (6!.) Breathe in for 3 seconds, then out, for 3 seconds!. Try to make your breathing very smooth, and light, as you breathe in through your nose, and out through your mouth, or nose!. (7!.) For the next minute, continue to breathe in, and out, every 3 seconds!. (8!.) Go back to step 3, at the end of the minute, and proceed through to step 7, doing this for 5 minutes!. Use this at the very first sign of a panic attack starting, or any time you feel anxious, or tense!.
Because many people can't access/afford professional therapy, I include the EFT, and EMDR variant for them to try, free of charge!. Cognitive Behavio(u)ral Therapy is generally available in most areas, but EMDR (see section 33) may well be worth trying, and is becoming more widespread!. (The following is a variant of EMDR therapy, which has been used successfully for those people suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, insomnia, and anxiety: it is easily learned, quick to use, yet can be very effective!. It is currently the subject of much study by neuroscientists, to discover how it works!. Don't dismiss it, merely because it seems a little strange: give it a tryout!)!. Prior to using either of the methods in the above paragraph, or using it on its own, first sit comfortably, and take a deep breath!.
Then, without moving your head, move your eyes from the left, to the right, and back again, taking around a second to do so (say: a thousand and one: this takes approximately a second)!. Repeat this procedure (without the words, although you can count, subvocally if you like) 20 times!. Then close your eyes and relax!. Become aware of any tension or discomfort you feel!. Then open your eyes, and take another deep breath, and repeat step one, closing your eyes, and relaxing afterwards, in the same manner!. Then, repeat the procedure one last time!. Some people may find that this is all they need do!. With experience, you may find that you can practise this in public, with your eyes closed, which greatly widens the window of opportunity for its use, and avoids attracting unwanted attention!.
It may also help to minimise, or eliminate caffeine products from your life (coffee can be a trigger) and sugar!. Xylitol, or Stevia is preferable, (health food stores) or fruit sugar (fructose, such as "Fruisana", from supermarket sugar aisles) or even a little honey!. Minimise/eliminate consumption of highly processed foods, particularly grain products, such as white bread, donuts, cake, cookies/biscuits, or anything with sugar!. Opt for more wholefoods, non-starchy vegetables, and fruit!.
INSOMNIA: Put your mind in a position where it wants to shut itself off, and sleep!. See insomnia treatments, in much more detail than can be included here, in section 3, at ezy build, below!. Use one of the relaxation methods, in bed, after lights out, on pages 2, 11, 2!.c, or 2!.i, but they can take some time to learn, (progressive muscular relaxation excepted) so learn and become proficient in their use during the day; an alternative is to use the EFT, in section 53, and pages 2!.q, and 2!.o, saying to yourself: "Even though I currently have a sleep disorder, I deeply and completely accept myself!." (or choose your own wording) while you use the acupressure tapping!. Some more; quick, and easy to learn, are at http://www!.umm!.edu/sleep/relax_tech!.htm I have not yet evaluated them, but they seem to be worthwhile trying, and I like to provide options!. Use the EMDR prior to the relaxation methods!.
I have a cup of chamomile herbal tea, an hour before bedtime, and use the above techniques, after lights out!. Others may prefer Sleepytime, by Celestial Seasonings, or valerian root, from supermarket tea, or health food aisles!.
Alcohol interferes with sleep, and more than 2 drinks daily acts as a depressant!. You may have depression: take the quiz via sections 1, & 2, (see page Z!.13 next) at ezy build!. "If you don't want someone to do something, get them to talk about it"!. Do what YOU WANT to do, or you will regret it, later!. Ask yourself if a man who has lied and manipulated you with guilt; "playing you", is the man you want to father your child, and what sort of a husband would he be!? He is unlikely to change!
RELATIONSHIPS: go to http://www!.relationshiptalk!.net/forums/a!.!.!. and http://www!.relationshipweb!.com and http://www!.relationship-affairs!.com/your!.!.!. and BOARDS, at http://www!.mental-health-today!.com/ptsd/!.!.!. and http://www!.kasamba!.com/ may be worth a look as well!.Www@Answer-Health@Com