Does it ever REALLY get better?!
Question: Does it ever REALLY get better!?
I am in my early 40s and I diagnosed with BPD (borderline not bipolar) when I was 25 or so!. mostly I'm much better than I used to be!. Not cut for 10 yrs nor been in hospital since 1995!. when I come into conflict with authority figures is when my problems recur!. I wear a cheerful mask & my workmates & even my husband don't know how i really feel!. my therapist is the only one who knows!. when I started my current job I had some time off sick with depression in the 1st year but for the last 6 months my sickness record has been almost perfect (one day off)!. I was passed over for another job I wanted (in the same place) because my boss said I was untrustworthy because of my past sickness!. In all other respects I i can see her point but I've tried my best, and it's still not good enough, and I wonder if I will ever function on an equal footing with everyone else, or be seen as normal by others!. I'm not just disappointed, I'm devastated, and I guess the extreme reaction is typical for BPD!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Answers:
You have done really well over the past 15 or so years!. so dont let your boss spoil it!. If she specifically mentioned your illness as a reason for not promoting you, there is a case for discrimination under disability discrimination (but this may cause more problems than it solves) It may be comfort enough for you to know that she is wrong to deny you a promotion for health reasons alone and that it is her prejudice and not your condition that is stopping you progress!.
To be honest you may never function on an equal footing with others in some respects!. People with fewer health worries and more confidence seem to have it made!. i often feel that one day people will find out Im a total fraud and see me for the 'mental health problem' that I feel I am inside!. however ive been feeling this way since I was 18 and Im in my 50s now!. My cover hasnt been blown so far ! But you are equal to others in most respects!. You have the potential to do as well if not better than them!. Plus I think that people who make it through problems have an extra edge when it comes to being a good friend, and understanding others!. Dont worry about the odd thoughts, theyre just part of it all!. You can subdue them or let them flow, because you know you arent going to act on them!. Just know that this boss is maybe not a nice person generally, and you may meet others like her, but you have your family who love you and thats what matters more!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
To be honest you may never function on an equal footing with others in some respects!. People with fewer health worries and more confidence seem to have it made!. i often feel that one day people will find out Im a total fraud and see me for the 'mental health problem' that I feel I am inside!. however ive been feeling this way since I was 18 and Im in my 50s now!. My cover hasnt been blown so far ! But you are equal to others in most respects!. You have the potential to do as well if not better than them!. Plus I think that people who make it through problems have an extra edge when it comes to being a good friend, and understanding others!. Dont worry about the odd thoughts, theyre just part of it all!. You can subdue them or let them flow, because you know you arent going to act on them!. Just know that this boss is maybe not a nice person generally, and you may meet others like her, but you have your family who love you and thats what matters more!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
If you are in UK and feeling self-destructive phone the Samaritans right now!.
As for the job probs everyone feels down when things like that happen!.
But even though borderline personality can't be gotten rid of, it can be controlled with medication so go have a chat with your doctor again and they will help you!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
As for the job probs everyone feels down when things like that happen!.
But even though borderline personality can't be gotten rid of, it can be controlled with medication so go have a chat with your doctor again and they will help you!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
I think you need to get strong, it's other people that make people depressed stick the V's up at them all and try and be happy we are all here for a reason live for yourself and not others!. Good Luck hope you get wellWww@Answer-Health@Com
Everyone is dealt a hand it life, and that's just what we have to play with!. No matter how much it sucks, no matter how painful it is and unbearable it can become, IT ALWAYS GETS BETTER!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Stop building your self worth on what other folks think of you!. No matter what we do, life just aint always fair!. Get on with the art of living sweetie, seriously you're worth it!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
well my dear what ive read is that you have come a very very long way ok, right lets build on that think to yourself even read these comments on here you can beat it, you are very very brave so far so whats stoping you going furher and furher to get rid of all your feeling, let me tell you now there is a light at the end of that tunnel and you are allmost there, so come on cheer up be positive and get there ok tc and good luvk to you xxWww@Answer-Health@Com
Hi sweetie, I have been bipolar for several years since my husband died and I was abusing valium (prescribed) !.My therapist said the over use caused my brain chemistry to change !. You state that you are borderline, not bipolar but I do have a lot of the same problems!.My illness is pretty well controlled with meds but not completely!. I have developed an attitude of "I don't care what they think"!. You can't please everyone no matter how hard you try!. Be yourself , stop wearing that mask, if you can't be your lovely self you will not get better!. Love yourself as God loves you!. Your worth does not depend on others!. And you have nothing to be ashamed of !.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Oh you poor thing,i can totally relate to how you feel,the world is a cruel place and people just seem to be so heartless these days!. Its like everyone expects you to be perfect but when you're not they put you down!. Nobody should do this to anyone!. What advice can i give as i myself feel a complete miserable failure most of the time too,all i can say is when i hear what you say i just see someone that deserves to be loved and cared for not abused so ignore all the selfish gits that abuse you and just be you!. I have started to think myself,i will be who i am and if people dont like it tough,accept that maybe nobody will ever understand you and thats just the way it is but thats not necessarily a bad thing it just means you're special in your own unique way!. Dont try so hard to please everyone anymore,if you're having a bad day,you're having a bad day and thats all there is to it,just take each day as it comes, life is an overgrown forest not a neat little garden,sometimes you have to stumble your way through!. Just be you,thats what they do so why shouldnt you and remember whatever any of these people think, God loves you and is always with you!. My point is this, just be you and sod the lot of them!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
It really does suck that more places of employment dont offer time off for people with mental illnesses!. Suicide rate would probable go down if people could get a week off with pay once in awhile!. I guess if you have a union behind you that would work, but other then that the boss doesnt want to hear about your personal problems!. It sucks!. You just gotta keep on pushing on!. If you have a drug problem and you work for a union they will pay for your treatment, and give your job back!. I just think that is unfair!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
You must not feel as though you're not an equal with everyone else!.!.!. I know for a fact that a large percentage of the population of the UK are on Prozac - the Government have told doctors to stop prescribing it as it's so expensive on the national health - some of the most successful people both in showbusiness and academically suffer from depression, it means you're not an ordinary, boring run of the mill person!.!.!.!.you are special!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
I feel your pain!. I wrote about wanting to die last night!. I am BPD too!.
But look at all the progress you have made! You have not been hospitalized in a long time, you no longer cut yourself, and you are able to be in a relationship with your husband and therapist!.
I am sorry you got passed over for the job!. Maybe another one will come up and by then you will have shown your boss that you are trustworthy!.
Just remember, work is not everything!. Just the fact that you are employed is a credit!. You should be proud of all your accomplishments!. You have come along way!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
But look at all the progress you have made! You have not been hospitalized in a long time, you no longer cut yourself, and you are able to be in a relationship with your husband and therapist!.
I am sorry you got passed over for the job!. Maybe another one will come up and by then you will have shown your boss that you are trustworthy!.
Just remember, work is not everything!. Just the fact that you are employed is a credit!. You should be proud of all your accomplishments!. You have come along way!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
it'll get better if you try for it to get better!.!.!.!.!. im 14 with major depression and ocd!.!.!.!.!. ive had them for ever since i remember!.!.!.!.!. ive gotten a lot better!.!.!.!.!. i cut my self for a while, but now im trying to stop!.!.!.!. its really hard!. try to prove to them that your better than them!.!.!.!.!.!. that you can handle it, no matter what they say!.!.!.!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
so much has been sai already, i can strongly empathize im in the mid of bein diagnosed im so confused but u have given me hope that i can stop the cutting and stuff!!! i hate my job to but i cant quit cause im the boss lol!. reading you blog even though you are unhappy hasmade me feel good!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!. because even though you haveing a blip now you have over come so much and were happy, ok so your having a blip now but that will pass u can be happy again right!? i truely admire people like you, who although are not compleatly better you are through the worst of it and on a path to happiness, i seem to always be going the other way!. but u have given me hope again, mayb the impossible is possible who knows!. anyway as for your boss take the time off if she discaplines u sue her sorry fat ***!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
chin up and thank uWww@Answer-Health@Com
chin up and thank uWww@Answer-Health@Com
Oh yes very much so, believe me when I say that things WILL get better for you at some point in the future!. I myself used to have low self worth in the past but have with time realised that WE are the choosers of our future!. It's US who decide what WE want to do and where we want to go in life!. I have a female friend who was the victim of abuse with her ex partner for a great many years and she felt just like yourself but also suffered from panic attacks and anxiety!. She said that she often wanted to "Numb" the pain and at one point wanted to crash her car!. I'm sure that you have a husband that loves and cares for you so much, though I can understand just how hard it has been to get through life with your condition!. Sometimes pain directs us to our goals, that pain can in the end however set us free if you take the chance!. Learn that life is not a disappointment as life can be what you make it, never bring yourself down as you're a special woman who is just as good as the next person and I'm sure with the love and support of your husband and family you can leave behind this most awful condition at some point in your life!.
Thank you and take care :)
TPS xxWww@Answer-Health@Com
Thank you and take care :)
TPS xxWww@Answer-Health@Com
unfortunately the work place can be difficult especially when you have a weakness there was always be someone stronger ready to push you out of the way!. I think depression and such scares bosses as they never know when you will become unwell again, which is fair enough as you dont know either! But you are doing well, you have a job, it would be so easy for others in your position to give up work and go on benefits, but you are trying and good for you, you have a loving husband, its only a job, you are worth so much more than that, think of all the good things you have and dont focus on negatives and dont speak to you bosses dont show them any weaknesses f*** them, just let them pay your salary!Www@Answer-Health@Com