Scared to get close to people?!
Question: Scared to get close to people!?
i have trouble letting people get close to me!.!.!.i get really scared about it!.!.!.i can't be in a relationship with someone for more than like 4 days without freaking out!.!.!. i even had a pet rat once and she was affectionate(like when she was out of her cage she always sat near me and when i moved her she would run back to me) and that even kind of freaked me out!.!.!.i don't know what it is!.!.!.or how to overcome it!. Im 20 years old and im still a virgin and i haven't even kissed anyone b/c i am too scared to!.!.!.its ridiculous!!!! I crave other peoples affection but when they try to give it to me i freak out and get imensly uncomfortable and can't handle it!. Im not jsut talking about romantic relationships either!.!.!.however those are the worst!.!.!.i can sort of handle platonic stuff like i can give my dad and sisters hugs sort of!.!.!.but even then i try not to concentrate on it!.!.!. can anybody relate to this!? and know how to overcome it!.
thanks in advance
marissa ^_^Www@Answer-Health@Com
thanks in advance
marissa ^_^Www@Answer-Health@Com
Answers:
Social anxiety is the third largest psychological problem in the North America today!. This type of anxiety affects 15 million Americans in any given year!. Unlike some other psychological problems, social anxiety is not well understood by the general public or by medical and mental health care professionals, such as doctors, psychiatrists, psychologists, therapists, social workers, and counselors!. In fact, people with social anxiety are misdiagnosed almost 90% of the time!. People with social phobia come to our anxiety clinic labeled as "schizophrenic", "manic-depressive", "clinically depressed", "panic disordered", and "personality disordered", "borderline personality disorder"
among other damaging misdiagnoses!.
Because few socially-anxious people have heard of their own problem, and have never seen it discussed on any media, such as the television talk shows, they think they are the only ones in the whole world who have these terrible symptoms!. Therefore, they must keep quiet about them!. It would be awful if everyone realized how much anxiety they experienced in daily life!. Then what would people think about them!? Unfortunately, without some kind of education, knowledge, and appropriate treatment, social phobia/social anxiety continues to wreak havoc throughout their lives!. Adding to the dilemma, when a person with social anxiety finally gets up the nerve to seek help, the chances that they can find it are very, very slim!.
Making the situation more difficult is that social anxiety does not come and go like some other physical and psychological problems!. If you have social anxiety one day!.!.!.!.!.!.you have it every day for the rest of your life!.!.!.!.!.
The feelings I described to you at the beginning of the article are those of people with social anxiety disorder!. That is, their symptoms apply to most social events and functions in almost every area of life!. I suffered from social anxiety myself for twenty years before I ever saw the term or read about its symptoms in a book!. (The first book that specifically dealt with social phobia was not published until the 1990's!.)
As with all problems, everyone with social anxiety has slightly different secondary symptoms!. Some people, for example, cannot write in public because they fear people are watching and their hand will shake!. Others are very introverted and they find it too difficult to hold down a job!. Still others have severe anxiety about eating or drinking in the presence of other people!. Some people with social anxiety feel that a certain part of their body (such as the face or neck) are particularly "strange looking" and vulnerable to being stared at!. Others experience a muscle spasm (usually around the neck and shoulders) and it becomes the center of their focus ---"it's so embarrassing that if someone sees it I will be humiliated forever!"
One thing that all socially anxious people share is the knowledge that their thoughts and fears are basically irrational!. That is, people with social anxiety know that others are really not critically judging or evaluating them all the time!. They understand that people are not trying to embarrass or humiliate them!. They realize that their thoughts and feelings are somewhat exaggerated and irrational!. Yet, despite this rational knowledge, they still continue to feel differently!.
It is these automatic "feelings" and thoughts that occur around social situations that must be met and conquered in therapy!. Usually these anxious feelings are tied to thoughts that are entwined in a vicious cycle of negative expectations and negative appraisals!. It is a catch-22 situation: there is no way out without the appropriate therapy!.
!. Without treatment, social anxiety is a torturous and horrible emotional problem; with treatment, its bark is worse than its bite!. Add to this that current research is clear that cognitive-behavioral therapy is highly successful in the treatment of social anxiety!. In fact, the people who are unsuccessful are the ones who are not persistent in their practice and who won't stick with simple methods and techniques at home!. They are the ones who give up!.
If a person is motivated to end the years and years of crippling anxiety, then cognitive-behavioral treatment provides the methods, techniques, and strategies that come together to lessen the anxiety and make the world a much more enjoyable place!.
THERE IS A BETTER LIFE FOR ALL PEOPLE WITH SOCIAL ANXIETY!.Many of us have been through the crippling fears and constant anxiety that social phobia produces -- and have come out healthier and happier on the other side!.
You can too,dont give up!Www@Answer-Health@Com
among other damaging misdiagnoses!.
Because few socially-anxious people have heard of their own problem, and have never seen it discussed on any media, such as the television talk shows, they think they are the only ones in the whole world who have these terrible symptoms!. Therefore, they must keep quiet about them!. It would be awful if everyone realized how much anxiety they experienced in daily life!. Then what would people think about them!? Unfortunately, without some kind of education, knowledge, and appropriate treatment, social phobia/social anxiety continues to wreak havoc throughout their lives!. Adding to the dilemma, when a person with social anxiety finally gets up the nerve to seek help, the chances that they can find it are very, very slim!.
Making the situation more difficult is that social anxiety does not come and go like some other physical and psychological problems!. If you have social anxiety one day!.!.!.!.!.!.you have it every day for the rest of your life!.!.!.!.!.
The feelings I described to you at the beginning of the article are those of people with social anxiety disorder!. That is, their symptoms apply to most social events and functions in almost every area of life!. I suffered from social anxiety myself for twenty years before I ever saw the term or read about its symptoms in a book!. (The first book that specifically dealt with social phobia was not published until the 1990's!.)
As with all problems, everyone with social anxiety has slightly different secondary symptoms!. Some people, for example, cannot write in public because they fear people are watching and their hand will shake!. Others are very introverted and they find it too difficult to hold down a job!. Still others have severe anxiety about eating or drinking in the presence of other people!. Some people with social anxiety feel that a certain part of their body (such as the face or neck) are particularly "strange looking" and vulnerable to being stared at!. Others experience a muscle spasm (usually around the neck and shoulders) and it becomes the center of their focus ---"it's so embarrassing that if someone sees it I will be humiliated forever!"
One thing that all socially anxious people share is the knowledge that their thoughts and fears are basically irrational!. That is, people with social anxiety know that others are really not critically judging or evaluating them all the time!. They understand that people are not trying to embarrass or humiliate them!. They realize that their thoughts and feelings are somewhat exaggerated and irrational!. Yet, despite this rational knowledge, they still continue to feel differently!.
It is these automatic "feelings" and thoughts that occur around social situations that must be met and conquered in therapy!. Usually these anxious feelings are tied to thoughts that are entwined in a vicious cycle of negative expectations and negative appraisals!. It is a catch-22 situation: there is no way out without the appropriate therapy!.
!. Without treatment, social anxiety is a torturous and horrible emotional problem; with treatment, its bark is worse than its bite!. Add to this that current research is clear that cognitive-behavioral therapy is highly successful in the treatment of social anxiety!. In fact, the people who are unsuccessful are the ones who are not persistent in their practice and who won't stick with simple methods and techniques at home!. They are the ones who give up!.
If a person is motivated to end the years and years of crippling anxiety, then cognitive-behavioral treatment provides the methods, techniques, and strategies that come together to lessen the anxiety and make the world a much more enjoyable place!.
THERE IS A BETTER LIFE FOR ALL PEOPLE WITH SOCIAL ANXIETY!.Many of us have been through the crippling fears and constant anxiety that social phobia produces -- and have come out healthier and happier on the other side!.
You can too,dont give up!Www@Answer-Health@Com
I can somewhat relate to this, I myself am a private person who is not too comfortable with being intimate with another person!. It takes time for me to warm up to people and I don't easily trust someone!. Maybe the reason you are like this is because you are scared that you will lose their affection or you're afraid of getting hurt!. Go see a psychologist if its really bad!. Which it sounds like it is!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
I'm the same way also, except I don't have any diagnosed disorder or any problem with getting close to animals!. You should probably talk to someone, or at least try to get to the root of the problem!. You are avoiding physical/emotional contact for a reason!. Once you figure out why, it should be easier!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
I'm not an expert, but that sounds very much like Avoidant Personality Disorder!. Google!. I think you will find some of what you are describing about yourself!. The treatment is therapy!. If I remember right, this is one of the personality disorders that is more treatable since the ppl are usually highly motivated!. That sounds like you, too!. You can get beyond this!. The sooner you take steps to do so, the fuller you life will be!.Www@Answer-Health@Com