Professionals Can't even give hugs?!
Question: Professionals Can't even give hugs!?
Hi,
I understand why professional people can't give hugs or have any physical contact with clients, like social workers, doctors, psychiatrists counsellors etc, it's too personal, possibily an invasion of space, they could be taken up on some sort of inappropriate touch accusation, could confuse the client, could lead to abuse or something!.!.!.!.
but do you not think it's so awful that this is the world we live in!? Where Professionals are afraid to touch a client at all!?
I know I have sat so many times with my key worker who is also a female and cried my heart out and yet she won't come over and hug me and infact told me once she would give me a hug only she wasnt allowed!
However in saying this I no a few professionals don't really follow the guidelines completely and will occasionally hug someone or give some sort of physical comforting gesture!.
anyone have any views or personal experiencesWww@Answer-Health@Com
I understand why professional people can't give hugs or have any physical contact with clients, like social workers, doctors, psychiatrists counsellors etc, it's too personal, possibily an invasion of space, they could be taken up on some sort of inappropriate touch accusation, could confuse the client, could lead to abuse or something!.!.!.!.
but do you not think it's so awful that this is the world we live in!? Where Professionals are afraid to touch a client at all!?
I know I have sat so many times with my key worker who is also a female and cried my heart out and yet she won't come over and hug me and infact told me once she would give me a hug only she wasnt allowed!
However in saying this I no a few professionals don't really follow the guidelines completely and will occasionally hug someone or give some sort of physical comforting gesture!.
anyone have any views or personal experiencesWww@Answer-Health@Com
Answers:
Hi
I can see this from both points of view - I have been, and still am a mental health service user, but I also now work as a mental health support worker in a drop-in centre!.
As a service user I myself have been in the position of wanting and needing a hug!. I did have a counsellor once who did hug me!.
As a worker I have been in the position of wanting to hug someone who was in distress and clearly needed it!. But also in situations where clearly it what was wanted but with a client I wouldn't have been happy having physical contact with!. So from that point of view I see that is much fairer to not have physical contact with anybody, that way I cannot be accused of only hugging some people and not others - that clearly wouldn't be fair or right!.
On the other hand, a lot of people I work with are very vulnerable, so it is vital that clear boundaries are set!.
For me to hug a person in this case I feel it may do more lasting damage than it would good!. I'll explain; if that person comes to expect this all the time, that would clearly be inappropriate!. It also may lead to the client becoming more dependent on me, as opposed to other workers, which clearly wouldn't be a good thing!.
As a worker I feel that it is my duty to have an outside and overall view of the situation and to do my best to ensure the safety of both my client and myself at all times!.
Boundaries are there to protect both sides!. I can't show that it is acceptable for physical contact when I'm working but then say it is inappropriate if I bump into that person in the street - as that would send mixed messages to vulnerable clients and not be in their best interest!.
Also on the side of protecting myself; I wouldn't be comfortable hugging all of the clients I come into contact with as I feel it would be seen as more than me trying to offer support, and would lead to some of them thinking I was open to more than just that (if you see what I mean)!.
So as I said, although it may seem sad, or a comment on society today, there are reasons when it is more appropriate to steer clear of physical contact, even when people I'm supporting are clearly distressed and needy!.
That said, I do not see any problem with a hand on someone's shoulder, or occasionally holding someone's hand for a while as long as this is in clear site of everyone and not in any way overt!. It is something I would feel comfortable doing with either male or female clients!.
As with all things in life, there are some things and some people, who we are more comfortable with and so would do things against the norm or rules, but I still think that it is much fairer to everyone if I take a consistent approach!.
It's a good question and one that obviously some people feel strongly about, I just hope that I have explained my reasons well enough so that you see that I am not just following procedures and rules because I have to, but because they have been well thought out for the benefit of everyone concerned!.
Take care!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
I can see this from both points of view - I have been, and still am a mental health service user, but I also now work as a mental health support worker in a drop-in centre!.
As a service user I myself have been in the position of wanting and needing a hug!. I did have a counsellor once who did hug me!.
As a worker I have been in the position of wanting to hug someone who was in distress and clearly needed it!. But also in situations where clearly it what was wanted but with a client I wouldn't have been happy having physical contact with!. So from that point of view I see that is much fairer to not have physical contact with anybody, that way I cannot be accused of only hugging some people and not others - that clearly wouldn't be fair or right!.
On the other hand, a lot of people I work with are very vulnerable, so it is vital that clear boundaries are set!.
For me to hug a person in this case I feel it may do more lasting damage than it would good!. I'll explain; if that person comes to expect this all the time, that would clearly be inappropriate!. It also may lead to the client becoming more dependent on me, as opposed to other workers, which clearly wouldn't be a good thing!.
As a worker I feel that it is my duty to have an outside and overall view of the situation and to do my best to ensure the safety of both my client and myself at all times!.
Boundaries are there to protect both sides!. I can't show that it is acceptable for physical contact when I'm working but then say it is inappropriate if I bump into that person in the street - as that would send mixed messages to vulnerable clients and not be in their best interest!.
Also on the side of protecting myself; I wouldn't be comfortable hugging all of the clients I come into contact with as I feel it would be seen as more than me trying to offer support, and would lead to some of them thinking I was open to more than just that (if you see what I mean)!.
So as I said, although it may seem sad, or a comment on society today, there are reasons when it is more appropriate to steer clear of physical contact, even when people I'm supporting are clearly distressed and needy!.
That said, I do not see any problem with a hand on someone's shoulder, or occasionally holding someone's hand for a while as long as this is in clear site of everyone and not in any way overt!. It is something I would feel comfortable doing with either male or female clients!.
As with all things in life, there are some things and some people, who we are more comfortable with and so would do things against the norm or rules, but I still think that it is much fairer to everyone if I take a consistent approach!.
It's a good question and one that obviously some people feel strongly about, I just hope that I have explained my reasons well enough so that you see that I am not just following procedures and rules because I have to, but because they have been well thought out for the benefit of everyone concerned!.
Take care!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
In this litigious society, it is certainly risky, if not downright unwise, to do anything which could be even remotely construed as inappropriate touching!.
May I suggest that you get hugs from your loved ones at home rather than run the risk in the office!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
May I suggest that you get hugs from your loved ones at home rather than run the risk in the office!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
I think Doctors etc have to stay professional because any actions such as a hug could be regarded as misconduct!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
I have been in mental health system as a service user for 12 years and have often pondered this subject!. I have seen many professionals over time and my experience is this:
A hand shake from my female shrink!.
A laddish but genuine hand grip/shake from my social worker!.
The most interesting is my key worker where I used to live who I known for about 8 years very closely now!.!.!.Normally a handshake but at particularly traumatic times it lingers a while with a gentle squeeze!! I like that!.!.!.Im totally straight but it makes me feel safe and of some significance!
Now Ive just shared that with the world I hope thay dont mind!!Www@Answer-Health@Com
A hand shake from my female shrink!.
A laddish but genuine hand grip/shake from my social worker!.
The most interesting is my key worker where I used to live who I known for about 8 years very closely now!.!.!.Normally a handshake but at particularly traumatic times it lingers a while with a gentle squeeze!! I like that!.!.!.Im totally straight but it makes me feel safe and of some significance!
Now Ive just shared that with the world I hope thay dont mind!!Www@Answer-Health@Com
Y'know something!.!.!.there is no way that I could stand by and see someone crying their eyes out, and NOT hug them!!! I defy anyone to do that! When I qualify as a social worker, I am not going to be afraid to hug anyone - and bugger the consequences, quite frankly!. Humans need physical contact, and thats all there is to it!. I'm willing to take the risk of it going against me - just so long as I made one person feel better for a hug!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Many mental health professionals quite routinely offer and give appropriate hugs!.
It is, by no means "forbidden" or necessarily even actively discouraged in the profession as a whole!. In fact, for some clients, a hug offered and received can be profoundly therapeutic (e!.g!., safe touch)!.
It truly does depend on the professional with whom you are working, as to whether or not they give hugs!. There are, of course, some organizations (some hospitals or community mental health centers) which may have a "no touch" policy, however, this is not the norm in private practice!.
~M~Www@Answer-Health@Com
It is, by no means "forbidden" or necessarily even actively discouraged in the profession as a whole!. In fact, for some clients, a hug offered and received can be profoundly therapeutic (e!.g!., safe touch)!.
It truly does depend on the professional with whom you are working, as to whether or not they give hugs!. There are, of course, some organizations (some hospitals or community mental health centers) which may have a "no touch" policy, however, this is not the norm in private practice!.
~M~Www@Answer-Health@Com
ive been to many mental health proffessionals and i think your right!. The world we live in is rediculas (i think thats how u spell it) People that need to see such people do need comfort and support and its human nature that you get that from human contact, not just talking but touching!. If your crying and your husband/boyfriend just sat there and talked to you, didn't touch your arm or hug you it would make you feel worse right!?
I'm 19 and to be honest i do blame the youth of this country, teenagers saying a teacher grabbed their wrist and prosecuting them for assault when the teenagers them self were being threatening!. This world needs a shake up otherwise its just going to get worseWww@Answer-Health@Com
I'm 19 and to be honest i do blame the youth of this country, teenagers saying a teacher grabbed their wrist and prosecuting them for assault when the teenagers them self were being threatening!. This world needs a shake up otherwise its just going to get worseWww@Answer-Health@Com
Yes it is a sad and uncaring world we live in these days and it is sad that because of so few people everyone else is made to suffer!. But most companies now have in their policies that they are to have no personal contact with any other employes/clients mostly because of the whole sexual harrassment movement and companies are only doing that as a way to protect themselves because there are so many people out there who will sue on the drop of a hat!. I think it's sad that we live in a world where people are afraid to hug or even touch another employee because of what can be misconstrued!. But rules or no rules, I would hug and offer my shoulder for anyone I worked with to cry on and I'm sorry your coworker didnt fel the same!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
After the separation from my first girlfriend whom I loved so much, I was for months without any female contact!. I was then being examined for a bowel complaint by a lady doctor, and remember thinking how very nice it was to feel the touch of a woman again!. The real danger was if I allowed this to become something I depended on!.
In a courtship situation, the solution would be marriage where dependency of the touch of your loved one is not a problem, and this is the route I took then with disasterous consequences later!.
As a society, we need many more opportunities to hug one another without some sour-faced killjoy passing judgement!. The professionals (and that includes spiritual advisers such as priests) need ideally to set up havens where touching and hugging is allowed and encouraged between those where a lasting loving relationship and mutual dependancy would be no bad thing!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
In a courtship situation, the solution would be marriage where dependency of the touch of your loved one is not a problem, and this is the route I took then with disasterous consequences later!.
As a society, we need many more opportunities to hug one another without some sour-faced killjoy passing judgement!. The professionals (and that includes spiritual advisers such as priests) need ideally to set up havens where touching and hugging is allowed and encouraged between those where a lasting loving relationship and mutual dependancy would be no bad thing!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
I agree that it's horrible where we live in a society where someone cannot give another human being a hug because of the profession they are in and are afraid of misconduct!. There were times when I was with my old counsellor and all I did was cry and she used to rub my arm and tell me that if she could give me a hug should would have!. It was horrible both of us knowing that we couldn't have a simple hug to make me feel better in case anything more got said about it!.
I know some professionals won't get involved in any physical contact and it is a real shame because sometimes, i know for me, all I needed sometimes was a hug!. A hug can make the world of difference to someone who is distressed and they just want comforting!. I'm someone who couldn't go to family or 'loved ones' for a hug because of how life has turned out for me!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
I know some professionals won't get involved in any physical contact and it is a real shame because sometimes, i know for me, all I needed sometimes was a hug!. A hug can make the world of difference to someone who is distressed and they just want comforting!. I'm someone who couldn't go to family or 'loved ones' for a hug because of how life has turned out for me!.Www@Answer-Health@Com