What do i need ,how can i do it?!

No, it's not alright to be insulted or humiliated!. If you let people insult or humiliate you they will knock and lower your own self-esteem/self-worth!. No-one has the right to treat you like this, and the thing is that people who usually behave in this way tend to have low self-esteem themselves!.

I'm not sure I've correctly understood all that your question says, but I think I'm right in saying that your family and in particular your mother has for a long time being subjecting your to mental abuse!. I find it horrifying that your mother called you a pig or an animal, that is so damaging; it's no wonder that you are now underweight and control your life by your food intake!. Your mother may have said it was a joke but I don't for one minute think she was joking, if she was it is a sick joke!.

The verbal insults you have endured have been verging on emotional cruely, but what is done is done!.

The best way to learn to stand up for yourself is to learn to be Assertive!. MIND run a Confidence & Assertiveness course which is free (well it was when I did it)!. I've done lots of courses but this has been the most beneficial and useful course I have ever done!. Local colleges generally run Assertiveness courses too!.

A book I would also recommend is 'A Woman In Your Own Right (assertiveness and you) by Anne Dickson!. When I bought it four years ago it was

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