What are some things I can do to get over social anxiety?!
Question: What are some things I can do to get over social anxiety!?
I'm 19yrs old and I have no job I stay at home most of my time!. I do go to Community College a very small one, and every time I have to go I get very nervous feeling and almost back out of going!. I really can't live like this anymore it has got so bad that I cannot even go outside without thinking that the neighbor might see me and think bad about the way I look!. I need a job very bad, both my parents tell me I need to get a job! If anyone has gone through this please let me know what it was that got you through it!. I have talked with my mum about this but she just brushed it off, I think she believes that I am lazy and would rather stay home and do nothing! I wish I could be like people my age and go out on weekends but I just can't!. Thank you for reading this please comment useful things this was very hard for me to even write to people online, so again thanks!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Answers:
I have been living with Social Anxiety for!.!. well!.!. since I was a kid!.
I have been to a few different psychologists, and even been prescribed medications, nothing worked, but the medications really screwed up my head and cost me friends and family, I just wasn't treating anyone right!.
The best thing so far, that I am still currently working on, is just to put yourself out there into those uncomfortable situations as hard as it is, and you will get used to it!.
When you go to the grocery store, make small talk with the clerk by offering a compliment like "I like your nails, where did you get them done!?" It will come easier with time, I'm already feeling improvements!.
What you have to remember is, to just not care what anyone thinks, which is the hardest part!. Just realize that everyone else has much more important things to worry about other than picking you apart with their eyes, and if they don't, then THEY are the one with the problem, not you! :)
I hope this will help you in some way!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
I have been to a few different psychologists, and even been prescribed medications, nothing worked, but the medications really screwed up my head and cost me friends and family, I just wasn't treating anyone right!.
The best thing so far, that I am still currently working on, is just to put yourself out there into those uncomfortable situations as hard as it is, and you will get used to it!.
When you go to the grocery store, make small talk with the clerk by offering a compliment like "I like your nails, where did you get them done!?" It will come easier with time, I'm already feeling improvements!.
What you have to remember is, to just not care what anyone thinks, which is the hardest part!. Just realize that everyone else has much more important things to worry about other than picking you apart with their eyes, and if they don't, then THEY are the one with the problem, not you! :)
I hope this will help you in some way!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
screw others!.!.!.!.!.just be urself!.!.!.!.dont care wat people thinks abut u !.!.!.!.give urself a bit space!.!.!.everything gonna be cool!.!.!.!.trust me!.!.!.!.n try 4 a job !.!.!.!.!.!.any kinda job!.!.!.!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Well there are antidepressants like Paxil that are very good for social anxiety but they aren't drugs that you go on casually, you have to stay on them for months at a time and they have serious withdrawal effects, I would not reccommend them unless the problem is taking over your life!.
I was on Paxil and it forces you to calm down and you basically care a lot less about small things like what way the neighbor looked at you on a particular day!. You can focus and put things into a relaxed perspective and see what is important and what isn't!.
On an average day now I basically just ignore 99% percent of the people I see and just do what I set out to do and I find it works just fine and I can get things done!. Overcoming your anxiety will come with practice, in the meantime just learn to focus on the things that are important, don't take other people too seriously and you will be fine!.
Www@Answer-Health@Com
I was on Paxil and it forces you to calm down and you basically care a lot less about small things like what way the neighbor looked at you on a particular day!. You can focus and put things into a relaxed perspective and see what is important and what isn't!.
On an average day now I basically just ignore 99% percent of the people I see and just do what I set out to do and I find it works just fine and I can get things done!. Overcoming your anxiety will come with practice, in the meantime just learn to focus on the things that are important, don't take other people too seriously and you will be fine!.
Www@Answer-Health@Com
View the information and weblinks for social anxiety/shyness, and self confidence, in sections 9, and 38, at http://www!.ezy-build!.net!.nz/~shaneris Here is an exercise that can help you!. It is called "Act as If!." When you are in a social situation, act as if you are outgoing!. Talk more, smile at everyone, ask questions, speak in a normal or excited tone, not a meek tone!. Watch some of your outgoing peers, and imitate the style of their social behavior!.
Research shows that when you "act as if" continually, your image of yourself begins to conform to your new behavior!. In this case, you will gain self-esteem and self-confidence, and begin to see yourself as socially normal, not shy!. You will become more socially successful, and this will motivate you to continue your new social behavior until it becomes a habit!.
Try this for a month, in every situation you can!. I am confident that you will become much more comfortable and outgoing!. One form of therapy is to go somewhere that nobody knows you, and deliberately make an utter fool of yourself: put on a paper hat, and scream out: "I'm queen/king of America!", or something else ridiculous, then get back in the taxi, (warn the driver of your intentions, first) or car, and leave!.
People will point, and say: "Look at that idiot"!. But, you're probably not up to the stage where you can do that, yet (I can, and I used to be shy)!. It will teach you that, although it isn't actually pleasant, you will survive; be stronger for the experience, and the next time (should you need to repeat this type of therapy) will be considerably easier!. Remember: "A fear avoided is a fear strengthened; a fear faced is a fear reduced!." Regard it as your final test: once you have accomplished it, the barrier will be broken; just don't go too far, the other way! Learn to laugh at yourself, and give a big, cheesy grin when others see you do something foolish, as we all do, occasionally!. It is endearing, if you don't do it too often!. Use positive affirmations: for example: "I am very likable and other people feel comfortable around me"!.
Write down all of your self limiting beliefs; then write down the positive counter of them, (exact opposite) and repeat them and imprint them into your mind!.
Most importantly: Force yourself to approach somebody and initiate some sort of communication!. Start out small by asking the time and directions and gradually go bigger!.
Although there are anti-anxiety medications (anxiolytics) available, these come with risks, and the possibility of side effects, habituation, even addiction, and withdrawal problems, and are unsuitable for young people!.
Try having a cup of "Tension Tamer", herbal tea, by Celestial Seasonings, (from supermarket tea, or health food aisles) or make some at home, and cool, then bottle, and drink as needed (I find it so strong tasting, that I need to drink it quickly, followed by something like fruit juice, to take away the taste, but others may find it more tolerable)!. C(h)amomile tea is a more palatable option!. As with all herbal/green teas, use lemon/lime, and/or a little sweetener (NOT ARTIFICIAL!!!) but no cream, or milk!.
Xylitol, or Stevia is preferable, (health food stores) or fruit sugar (fructose, such as "Fruisana", from supermarket sugar aisles) or even a little honey, because these will reduce "sugar spikes"!. Valerian has also been recommended, but some people experience "valerian hangovers"!. Ensure you know how you react to it, before doing something potentially dangerous, like going out on the roads!. The idea is to use the above like water wings, to provide initial, short term support, while you become proficient in the above techniques!.
Www@Answer-Health@Com
Research shows that when you "act as if" continually, your image of yourself begins to conform to your new behavior!. In this case, you will gain self-esteem and self-confidence, and begin to see yourself as socially normal, not shy!. You will become more socially successful, and this will motivate you to continue your new social behavior until it becomes a habit!.
Try this for a month, in every situation you can!. I am confident that you will become much more comfortable and outgoing!. One form of therapy is to go somewhere that nobody knows you, and deliberately make an utter fool of yourself: put on a paper hat, and scream out: "I'm queen/king of America!", or something else ridiculous, then get back in the taxi, (warn the driver of your intentions, first) or car, and leave!.
People will point, and say: "Look at that idiot"!. But, you're probably not up to the stage where you can do that, yet (I can, and I used to be shy)!. It will teach you that, although it isn't actually pleasant, you will survive; be stronger for the experience, and the next time (should you need to repeat this type of therapy) will be considerably easier!. Remember: "A fear avoided is a fear strengthened; a fear faced is a fear reduced!." Regard it as your final test: once you have accomplished it, the barrier will be broken; just don't go too far, the other way! Learn to laugh at yourself, and give a big, cheesy grin when others see you do something foolish, as we all do, occasionally!. It is endearing, if you don't do it too often!. Use positive affirmations: for example: "I am very likable and other people feel comfortable around me"!.
Write down all of your self limiting beliefs; then write down the positive counter of them, (exact opposite) and repeat them and imprint them into your mind!.
Most importantly: Force yourself to approach somebody and initiate some sort of communication!. Start out small by asking the time and directions and gradually go bigger!.
Although there are anti-anxiety medications (anxiolytics) available, these come with risks, and the possibility of side effects, habituation, even addiction, and withdrawal problems, and are unsuitable for young people!.
Try having a cup of "Tension Tamer", herbal tea, by Celestial Seasonings, (from supermarket tea, or health food aisles) or make some at home, and cool, then bottle, and drink as needed (I find it so strong tasting, that I need to drink it quickly, followed by something like fruit juice, to take away the taste, but others may find it more tolerable)!. C(h)amomile tea is a more palatable option!. As with all herbal/green teas, use lemon/lime, and/or a little sweetener (NOT ARTIFICIAL!!!) but no cream, or milk!.
Xylitol, or Stevia is preferable, (health food stores) or fruit sugar (fructose, such as "Fruisana", from supermarket sugar aisles) or even a little honey, because these will reduce "sugar spikes"!. Valerian has also been recommended, but some people experience "valerian hangovers"!. Ensure you know how you react to it, before doing something potentially dangerous, like going out on the roads!. The idea is to use the above like water wings, to provide initial, short term support, while you become proficient in the above techniques!.
Www@Answer-Health@Com
I would suggest you to take a personality test!. Then take it to your mother, if she then still thinks that you are fine!. I would see a doctor about the issue!. He/she may advise you to talk to a counselor, which is not painful at all, unless you have a lot of unresolved issues that you are hiding!. I suggest you trying to talk to 1 person a week and slowly moving up!. You will have to be independent at a time in your life and if you are having problems or issues now with even leaving your home you need to have them addressed by a professional!. It may not be something that you are interested in, but talk to someone!. Sometimes it takes talking to a few different people before you can find someone that you can trust!. You can also try help lines to get you started!. Try calling one and seeing if someone would meet with you!. Don't back out!. Pace yourself otherwise you can cause an over stimulus and that could make things worse in the end!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Negative emotions (like sadness, stress, anger, etc!.) causes your Serotonin production to be low; when your Serotonin level is low, you are more prone to getting Anxiety, Panic Attacks, Depression, etc!.
Medication like Antidepressants (SSRI - Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitor) helps to boost Serotonin level!.
But there are natural ways to do it without medication!. There's this strange herb called "St John's Wort" - it is said to be more effective than Prozac!. No, it is not for mild depression only and ignore those sayings!. In fact, it does help anxiety and panic-attacks as St John's Wort works like prozac!. Other natural ways will be exercise, diet, more exposure to light, etc!.
The problem is that, even if your Serotonin is balanced!.!.!. you have that "learned behavior" in your mind!. You need to break that initial cycle to destroy that learned behavior - Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT) does this!. A technique that you can use without CBT will be Distraction!.!.!. There are several other techniques to help cope them!
Ok, to use Distraction: Firstly, try to!.!.!.!.
Extracted from Source!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Medication like Antidepressants (SSRI - Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitor) helps to boost Serotonin level!.
But there are natural ways to do it without medication!. There's this strange herb called "St John's Wort" - it is said to be more effective than Prozac!. No, it is not for mild depression only and ignore those sayings!. In fact, it does help anxiety and panic-attacks as St John's Wort works like prozac!. Other natural ways will be exercise, diet, more exposure to light, etc!.
The problem is that, even if your Serotonin is balanced!.!.!. you have that "learned behavior" in your mind!. You need to break that initial cycle to destroy that learned behavior - Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT) does this!. A technique that you can use without CBT will be Distraction!.!.!. There are several other techniques to help cope them!
Ok, to use Distraction: Firstly, try to!.!.!.!.
Extracted from Source!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Look for a job where you will be appreciated!. Look for a job with skill shortages, and people will welcome you and treat you well!.
I teach English in Asia, and there are so many jobs going!.
You can be with others when you want to be, and alone when you want to be!. People are quite accepting of others here so teachers tend to hang out together on the weekend, with people they wouldn't usually hang out with in their home countries!.
Maybe you have a rare talent or skill that you may have to move towards, which is not just around the corner!? Go for your passion and dream and make it happen!. You'll forget all about your inhibitions!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
I teach English in Asia, and there are so many jobs going!.
You can be with others when you want to be, and alone when you want to be!. People are quite accepting of others here so teachers tend to hang out together on the weekend, with people they wouldn't usually hang out with in their home countries!.
Maybe you have a rare talent or skill that you may have to move towards, which is not just around the corner!? Go for your passion and dream and make it happen!. You'll forget all about your inhibitions!.Www@Answer-Health@Com