Question about my 3 year old daughter...please help?!
Question: Question about my 3 year old daughter!.!.!.please help!?
Okay!. It'll take a while for me to write my whole situation but please read it and try to help if you can!.
My daughter turned 3 in June and in the last few months , she is a very angry little girl!. I am a 22 year old single mom!. Her father is not involved in her life whatsoever!. He saw her once when she was a little over a year old, and he smacked her so from that day, he has not seen her!. He has wished death upon her and he just doesn'T want her in his life!. So Here I am raising my daughter on my own!. She is not from a one night stand, her father and I dated 2 years and he had leukemia and doctors told him he could never have children and here she is, so she is truly a blessing and miracle!.
But lately ( last 6 months or so )!.!.!.she is just so angry!. She always draws in black, always draws mean faces, never draws a mouth on anything, she told me that she wants me to paint her bedroom black ( which her room is a light pink ) !. She smacks herself in the face, she bites herself so hard that she has teeth marks in her skin for hours and hours!. She hits her head against the floor or against the wall!. She's just angry!. And a few weeks ago, we went out for a walk and she told me she wanted to get hit by a car so I said, you walk on the side of the street or we're going home, and within a flash of a second, she ran out into the middle of the street where a car was just a few feet away who managed to stop in time ( thank god )!.
So I took my daughter to the doctor and he gave me a referral to see someone at the Children's hospital!. So I brought her there on September 11th!. She saw a resident there and my daughter was literally biting , almost riping her skin off and I talked with the resident for about 45 minutes or so while my dad was with my daughter in the waiting room and than the resident and another doctor just observed her from far ( where my daughter couldn't see them ) and as soon as they approached her, she was hurting herself , biting herself, smacking herself!. So than they took us to the emergency room where we met with a crisis team for her behaviour, and her * self mutilation and suicidal thoughts * as they said!. And the hsopital gave me a call back today, and on Tuesday, September 30th, My daughter is having an assesment done in psychiatry!. So I'm just really scared!. Because my daughter won'T talk to strangers, she just won't!. She'll curl up in a ball most of the time or she'll hurt herself!. I know the appointment is with a psychiatrist, psychologist and a psychology nurse I believe!.!.!.so I'm just worried and just wondering what they can do to help, if anything!. Because this situation is just hurting me so much inside!. Anyways, thanks to everyone who takes the time to read this!. I'm just wondering what an assesment consists of and what should happen!. Thanks!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
My daughter turned 3 in June and in the last few months , she is a very angry little girl!. I am a 22 year old single mom!. Her father is not involved in her life whatsoever!. He saw her once when she was a little over a year old, and he smacked her so from that day, he has not seen her!. He has wished death upon her and he just doesn'T want her in his life!. So Here I am raising my daughter on my own!. She is not from a one night stand, her father and I dated 2 years and he had leukemia and doctors told him he could never have children and here she is, so she is truly a blessing and miracle!.
But lately ( last 6 months or so )!.!.!.she is just so angry!. She always draws in black, always draws mean faces, never draws a mouth on anything, she told me that she wants me to paint her bedroom black ( which her room is a light pink ) !. She smacks herself in the face, she bites herself so hard that she has teeth marks in her skin for hours and hours!. She hits her head against the floor or against the wall!. She's just angry!. And a few weeks ago, we went out for a walk and she told me she wanted to get hit by a car so I said, you walk on the side of the street or we're going home, and within a flash of a second, she ran out into the middle of the street where a car was just a few feet away who managed to stop in time ( thank god )!.
So I took my daughter to the doctor and he gave me a referral to see someone at the Children's hospital!. So I brought her there on September 11th!. She saw a resident there and my daughter was literally biting , almost riping her skin off and I talked with the resident for about 45 minutes or so while my dad was with my daughter in the waiting room and than the resident and another doctor just observed her from far ( where my daughter couldn't see them ) and as soon as they approached her, she was hurting herself , biting herself, smacking herself!. So than they took us to the emergency room where we met with a crisis team for her behaviour, and her * self mutilation and suicidal thoughts * as they said!. And the hsopital gave me a call back today, and on Tuesday, September 30th, My daughter is having an assesment done in psychiatry!. So I'm just really scared!. Because my daughter won'T talk to strangers, she just won't!. She'll curl up in a ball most of the time or she'll hurt herself!. I know the appointment is with a psychiatrist, psychologist and a psychology nurse I believe!.!.!.so I'm just worried and just wondering what they can do to help, if anything!. Because this situation is just hurting me so much inside!. Anyways, thanks to everyone who takes the time to read this!. I'm just wondering what an assesment consists of and what should happen!. Thanks!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Answers:
Oh man!. I am so sorry, I just read your question and that's awful : ( I'm 21, I don't have any children but I work at a daycare and i take care of the toddlers, 2 and 3 year olds, and I know we have this one boy!.!.he's 3, his name is Jack, and he's very angry!. Anytime he gets in trouble, he bites himself or hits himself in the face!. Not as extreme in your case, but it's still very scary to watch!. I'm guessing alot of her angry comes from her douchebag sounding father!. Even though she's very small and it only happened once, children are like sponges!. That day he smacked her and I'm sure verbally abused her, has probably stayed in her mind!. She's little, she has no idea how to handle her feelings, her anger!.!.so she takes it out on herself!. She may feel like it's her fault that her father's no longer in her life and has feelings of self hatred!. I know that's horrible because of how small she is!. Have you ever talked to her about her dad!? About how it's not her fault he's not in her life!? If you haven't, I think you should try to!. Everything you're doing for her is a good idea!. They'll help you and her and they will figure out a way for her to deal with her feelings!. I wish i could help you more, all I can say is that I think you're doing a wonderful job, I can only imagine how hard it is!.!.but she loves you, and you love her, and you both will get through this!. Goodluck, and if you ever need to talk, don't hesitate to email me!.!.Nicolegacole10@yahoo!.com!. If you want, let me know how things turn out!. I'm praying for you and your family!. <3 Www@Answer-Health@Com
She feels like nobody loves her!. She feels negative because that's all she knows!. You need to be happy yourself before she is ever happy!.With no dad around you are the only influence!. She is unhappy with her surroundings!. It must be pretty bad if she notices this at 3 yrs!. old!. My advise to you is show her that your happy and give her lots of hugs and kisses!. Don't let her hear you say anything negative!. If you take her to the psychiatrist they might recommend she be taken away from you!. She is trying to tell you how she feels!. LISTEN TO HER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Www@Answer-Health@Com
First of all, I'm sorry you have to go through this without the support of her father, but he's a jerk anyway!. You're doing the right thing by getting her help and getting to the root of the problem!. Do you think anyone could have physically abused her while she was in their care!? Children usually mimic behaviors done to them!. Try coaxing information out of her!. Www@Answer-Health@Com
chances are they'll just have her play and/or draw!. they'll try to talk to her but won't pressure her!. everyone is different, but this is the usual way an assessment is done on a child, specially as young as she is!.
good luck, my heart is with youWww@Answer-Health@Com
good luck, my heart is with youWww@Answer-Health@Com
Oh my God!. I've never heard of a 3 year old doing something like that!. You need to get to the bottom of this, because this is beyond unhealthy, as you could probably tell!. Maybe she's doing this to get attention, and somehow she's learned that serious stuff like this gets you all the attention in the world!. Find out were the Hell she learned this suicidal crap, because a normal 3 year old has no idea about any of that!. Who has she been hanging out with!? Does she go to daycare and has someone there said something or done something to her!? Has she been watching messed up psychological films unsupervised!? You should probably take some extra time off to spend just with her, because considering you're a working mom, she may feel left out, and, as I've said, before, is wanting your attention!.
Sit with her and speak with her!. Tell her you're not mad at her, you are very scared for her rather!. Ask her what you can do to make things better!. If she says that she just wants to die, say that'll make things worse,!.!.!.!. then weedle your way into finding out were she got these ideas!. Psychology isn't a science that only special people that go to school know about, it's common sense!. You need to monitor her alot more and figure this thing out!. I wish you luck!.
P!.S!. Let drugs be a LAST resort!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Sit with her and speak with her!. Tell her you're not mad at her, you are very scared for her rather!. Ask her what you can do to make things better!. If she says that she just wants to die, say that'll make things worse,!.!.!.!. then weedle your way into finding out were she got these ideas!. Psychology isn't a science that only special people that go to school know about, it's common sense!. You need to monitor her alot more and figure this thing out!. I wish you luck!.
P!.S!. Let drugs be a LAST resort!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
I had to put my son in inpatient car when he was 9 for awhile!. She may not be able to verbalize things but boy is she angry!. she is also directly challenging you like so what if I am bad, what are you gonna do about it!. Bad behavior has consequences for all people!. You must pick your battles with this spirited child!. Remeber you are the boss!. she seriously needs to learn to relax and chill!. anything you can do to bring her small joys would be wonderful!. Tell her you would paint her room black but it cost too much, because you have to paint it over like 10 times!. Don't be directly adversarial unless it counts as it does with safety issues!. I haven't spanked my kid in like forever!. Occasionally he says rude things to me!. I tell him not to and then i drop it!. 1 correction and move on!. I do however call my son out when he responds with huh!? He must say maam!? meaning for me to repeat myself!. this morning he said leave me alone when i brought his clean clothes in!. so i rolled my eyes after i turned around and he coudn't see and i went to refresh my coffee!. leave him be!. his behavior has dramatically improved!. he doesn't shock me anymore!. i treat everything as being normal!. he has foud he is unable to get a rise out of me and that i am a very boring parent!. yet he prefers to live with me than his dad, precisely because i give him security and routine that his father a musicain does not!. he says srude i tell him i love him!. and that has worked for me!.Www@Answer-Health@Com