Girlfriend is cutting :-( need all the help I can get?!
Question: Girlfriend is cutting :-( need all the help I can get!?
I love my girl friend to death and our relationship is almost perfect but she is still suffering from a cutting problem!. Every few weeks she'll get down or sad for whatever reason she tells me and she'll cut herself!. She has some scars from her teenage years and it's hurting me inside!.
I calmly told her how I felt and that I know it is an addiction and compulsion but It would mean a lot to me if she could get help!.
She said she would think about it, but in the meantime it's hurting me!.
I can wait and be patient, and im sure she knows how I feel but It hurts me to sit back and watch her cut herself like she is!.
and I love her too much to break up with her and that wouldn't help her either!.
What should I do!?
:-(Www@Answer-Health@Com
I calmly told her how I felt and that I know it is an addiction and compulsion but It would mean a lot to me if she could get help!.
She said she would think about it, but in the meantime it's hurting me!.
I can wait and be patient, and im sure she knows how I feel but It hurts me to sit back and watch her cut herself like she is!.
and I love her too much to break up with her and that wouldn't help her either!.
What should I do!?
:-(Www@Answer-Health@Com
Answers:
I think your doing a very good job by not judging your girlfriend!. It sounds like she has emotion regulation problems most associated with Borderline Personality traits!. These people feel emotion much more intensely than others and have developed maladaptive ways of coping with their extreme emotions!. As you have picked up, becoming judgemental and angry with her will not help her but will likely act as a further trigger for her emotion!. She is best dealt with in a supportive manner!. These problems are usually associated with problems initiated in childhood such as neglect/trauma etc!. Slowly and encouragingly prompt her to be assessed by a Clinical Psychologist!. Most effective therapies for this problem consist of variants of cognitive behaviour therapy (dialectical behaviour therapy, schema therapy) usually delivered by clinical psychologists but sometimes psychiatrists!. Medication tends to be less of a help long term, but can assist with the regulation of extreme emotion, particularly when client's emotions have driven them to high lethality suicide attempts!. In summary, be supportive and non-judgmental, and advocate for professional help!.
CheersWww@Answer-Health@Com
CheersWww@Answer-Health@Com
She has a mental problem and needs professional help!. When the mental dysfunction becomes too much, the mental hurt is so much that people like to cut themselves as they find physical pain more manageable than mental pain!. She needs serious help from a professional, not sure if its healthy for her to be in a relationship at this point!. Www@Answer-Health@Com
You should talk with your local mental health association!. They should have some support groups that are designed for self-cutters!. She needs to have some support, and realize that she is not the only one that is going through this problem!. I think that if she were to attend something like that, or talk with a counsellor or something, this should help her a lot!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
She needs to find other ways to express her emotions, healthier ways!. She is going to need help in order to do that!. If this is a long-standing problem she may have some trauma issues from her past she has yet to deal with!. Support her, and encourage her to seek help!. If possible, enlist her family to help!. But don't try to help her alone!. She needs professional help!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
first get her to admit she has a problem!. she needs help and she obviously can not do this on her own!. going to her doctor will provide the best care and resources to overcome this problem!. I was in the same boat about 6 years ago with my ex!.!.!. i understand what you are going through and its no easy road!. Www@Answer-Health@Com
get her to accept the problem and seek help for her!.
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Rocket, didn't your parents teach you to shut up if you don't have anything good to contribute!? People like you are the reason why people call America a group of obnoxious, rude yanks!.
But, for your girlfriend to be helped, she needs to want to be helped!.
If she is on antidepressants, that actually may be harming her as some medications lead to suicidal thoughts nstead of helping her!.
Have you suggested for her go to a counselor or something!? Or maybe if it's such a chronic thing, maybe she could go to to an outpatient or inpatient program!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
But, for your girlfriend to be helped, she needs to want to be helped!.
If she is on antidepressants, that actually may be harming her as some medications lead to suicidal thoughts nstead of helping her!.
Have you suggested for her go to a counselor or something!? Or maybe if it's such a chronic thing, maybe she could go to to an outpatient or inpatient program!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Well, from what I understand the reason they cut is to relieve pain!. It makes them feel better!. Maybe trying to find out why she feels bad could help but to be honest in the end its up to her!. As much as you might like, you wont be some knight in shining armor!. Sometimes these mental problems can be deep and very hard on a relationship!. Be prepared for a long hard road if you really love her!. I know im not man enough for a woman with these types of problems!. It takes a special person to deal with it!. I wish you the best!.!.!.!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
I once dated somebody who used to hurt herself, and getting over it involved finding a replacement - another way to relieve the stress!. I guess different people probably have different ways of going about it!. But it seems that cutting takes care of a need, and if a person is going to stop, they have to find another way to take care of their emotional needs!. If she doesn't see the stress going away, and she doesn't see how else to deal with it, stopping may seem like a bleak prospect!.
So!.!.!.maybe next time, remind her that if she gets counseling, they're not going to take away all her sharp objects!. She still has free will!. She can still cut herself if she decides that's what she really wants to do!. But maybe if she works on other ways to handle bad feelings, cutting won't be what she wants to do, all things considered!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
So!.!.!.maybe next time, remind her that if she gets counseling, they're not going to take away all her sharp objects!. She still has free will!. She can still cut herself if she decides that's what she really wants to do!. But maybe if she works on other ways to handle bad feelings, cutting won't be what she wants to do, all things considered!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
I'm so sorry to hear about your girl friends problem, and it's so nice to see someone that actually wants to help instead of cut out!.
I have known a lot of people who were cutters, one of them being a really good friend of mine now!. The only way they have been able to stop is by accepting Jesus Christ into their lives, and allowing Him to repair their damaged hearts!. It's isn't an easy thing to do; because, becoming a Christian doesn't mean life gets easy, it actually at times seems to get hard!.
If you want to see how God can change someones life check this page out: www!.lifespace!.cc/profile/Kayla
God bless, and; I will be praying for your girl friend, even though I don't know her name, and for God to guide you on what you should do!.
Feel free to send me a message if you have any questions about the website I put up there or about anything else!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
I have known a lot of people who were cutters, one of them being a really good friend of mine now!. The only way they have been able to stop is by accepting Jesus Christ into their lives, and allowing Him to repair their damaged hearts!. It's isn't an easy thing to do; because, becoming a Christian doesn't mean life gets easy, it actually at times seems to get hard!.
If you want to see how God can change someones life check this page out: www!.lifespace!.cc/profile/Kayla
God bless, and; I will be praying for your girl friend, even though I don't know her name, and for God to guide you on what you should do!.
Feel free to send me a message if you have any questions about the website I put up there or about anything else!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
I use to be a cutter, and I have scars from doing it too!. When she cuts, you do realize that it has nothing to do with you, and she's not doing it to hurt you!. I can't speak for her, but for me, when I would get really sad I would cut myself just to reassure myself that I could feel something other than sadness (ie!. the pain)!. It took me a week stay in a mental hospital and a year of mental health counseling before I was able to stop!. That was about 8 years ago, and to this day, when I get sad or upset about something, I want to cut myself, but I have learned to keep myself busy when those thoughts go into my head!. Just hang in there, and be there for her!. Nothing you say or do can make her stop!. Www@Answer-Health@Com
Well, first off the fact that you think your relationship is almost perfect speaks to your need for therapy!. To get at the root of why you think a relationship with someone who is suffering from a psychological disorder is your potential Mrs!. Right!. Because you are doomed to repeat your choices if she does not get professional help and manage this and you two break up!. And, in the end, without her overcoming this and the underlying issues through professional help, you two will not make it!.
You can love someone all you want, that does not mean you are the person that can help them!. She needs more help than you can even begin to offer!. And being in a relationship when you have issues such as cutting adds MORE stress to an already overwhelmed person!. Not LESS!.
You both need individual counseling and counseling as a couple!. And if she needs a breather from your relationship to get herself together, then you should love her enough to wait!. And give her the room she needs to heal the issues behind the marks!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
You can love someone all you want, that does not mean you are the person that can help them!. She needs more help than you can even begin to offer!. And being in a relationship when you have issues such as cutting adds MORE stress to an already overwhelmed person!. Not LESS!.
You both need individual counseling and counseling as a couple!. And if she needs a breather from your relationship to get herself together, then you should love her enough to wait!. And give her the room she needs to heal the issues behind the marks!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Hey that really sucks, but self control is attractive to me, I would personally dump her, its disgusting anybody can do that to themselves!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
dump the crazy *****Www@Answer-Health@Com