When someone goes through a lot of abuse..?!


Question: When someone goes through a lot of abuse!.!.!?
I have this friend who went through a lot of physical and emotional abuse in her life!.Through
it all how could she tell that I would not be the same like the other men in her life!?It angers me when I hear all the horror stories she told me!.As
we got to know one another,she would allow me to hug her or even hold her when needed!.Even
when she had her fainting spells she had no choice but to trust me to help her in her time of need!.To build her trust I would listen to her and I would always try to be honest with her!.Now she
trusts me more then she does anyone else!.What
ever relationship she gets into she tells them what has happened to her,and they start treating
her not very nice!.Whenever she needs comfort
from some one she always comes to me for it!.Why is that!?Is it because I helped her to heal
from the pain she endured in life!?I just don't know,please help I'm confused!.Www@Answer-Health@Com


Answers:
She's come to you because through all that she has been through you have been a constant, you have been there to help her, and people like stability!. She probably has a natural distrust from people because of the abuse, and you have been there to help her, you were nice to her, the power of being nice and understanding is far to under appreciated!. I think that you should be complimented to the highest degree that she comes to you, that someone who has been though a lot of abuse has found comfort in your personality!. Www@Answer-Health@Com

If the question is why does she come to you!.

I think you have already answered that!.

You have been kind, shown compassion been non judgmental, and offered a kind ear, and not approached her for anything else!.

Sounds like she trusts you, but if you find it to much , either ask her to be diplomatic in what she discusses with you, or ferry her towards a councillor were she can get the proper help she needs!.

Nice one, your a cool friend to have to her!. Www@Answer-Health@Com

Well, sometimes people start to break down mentally and can't hold themselves in any longer!. Then, they begin to fall into the hands of other people, but there's still a hesitant instinct inside!.

Losing your mind isn't very nice- especially when people are inducing it on you!.

It seems that you're really helping this girl- that's a very good thing!. If I ever had someone like that before I broke down, it probably would've prevented me!.

She may never heal- keep that in mind- but listening and being there really is the best thing!. You've helped her, and I think if you backed out now it would really impact her negatively!.

You've probably helped her heal and she knows she can trust you- and since you seem to have been there for a while, she KNOWS she can trust you!.

I was extremely repetitive in this, but I hope you get the idea!.

xDWww@Answer-Health@Com

Woman with abuse (especially sexual) histories as girls Develop into a Borderline Personality Disorder!. This disorder causes them to have very intense relationships and sabotage the relationship if a person gets too close!. They resist conventional therapy with excuses about previous therapist or therapy doesn't work for them!. They are masters at deflecting issues about them self to problems caused by others!. You are currently serving as her rescuer!. The next step will be to either sleep with you, thus ruining your relationship as a friend or increasing her demands on your time until you can't meet her needs and either way you end being like every man she has ever known!. You need to find another hobby or job!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

I'm wondering if you're asking what you really want to be asking!.!.!.

Obviously you care deeply for her!. And you are certainly her friend!. Is that all you want!?

And you are frustrated she keeps repeating this pattern of choosing abusers, am i correct!? You would like to know how to help her break the pattern!?

To break the pattern, it would be extremely helpful to her to have professional counselling!. If she can't afford the full price, there are many places that offer counselling for this free or on a sliding scale!. Though you are an EXCELLENT friend and she needs your support too, she also needs an unbiased, professional source!. Please find some options for her to get counselling and gently encourage her to try it!. There are also some excellent books that helped me!.!.!. and i will put the titles below

If you do wish to have a relationship with her!.!.!. and as i said i don't know if this is what you want, but if you do!.!.!. it is feeling strongly wanted that is sucking her into the bad relationships!. It is a self-esteem thing!. If you do wish her to consider you, you have to let her know, and be passionate about it!.Www@Answer-Health@Com





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