NOT THERAPY & NOT RELIGION what has helped you get over the past/depression?!


Question: NOT THERAPY & NOT RELIGION what has helped you get over the past/depression!?
I've had about 20 really f*cked up therapists in my life over the past 18 years!. And I'm a pretty f*cked up person!. Like, seriously, if anyone knew my whole true life story, they would probably think I'm just worthless and need to be scrapped!.

But lately I've had flickers of "ok, I'm starting to feel okay with myself" again!. Like I haven't had in about 6 years!.

If you felt this way, what helped you feel more normal!?

What gave you self-confidence!?

Did you ever feel like a worthy, normal person!?

!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!. or am I doomed to a life of isolated weirdness with constant anxiety and intermittent depression!?


- No answers suggesting therapy (20 failed therapists, one psychiatrist I should have de-boarded), or religion (a bunch of f*cked up relatives that probably actually got me this way; everyday was a potential day that Jesus would come back and the rapture would happen, or that I was going to hell for stealing my brother's pencil-cap eraser)Www@Answer-Health@Com


Answers:
Yeah, I just deal with it!. I'm pretty f'd in the head, but I don't really tell anyone about it!. I've dealt with lots of depression when I was younger, going as far as holding the knife to my wrist!. What got me through that was thinking about my family finding me and how they would feel!. Since I knew that they loved me (even though at times it was hard to believe) I didn't want to do that to them!. Actually, dumping religion was the biggest help at the time!. I was too dependent on waiting for Jesus or God to rescue me instead of doing anything for myself!. I was also scared to death that I was going to Hell all the time!. So I decided that if I wanted my life to improve I'd have to improve it myself!. I stopped going to church and I just said screw everyone and did what I wanted, to an extent!. I mean I wasn't as self concious about things!. I seriously struggle with social issues and relating to people!. My husband just says that I worry to much about how other people feel about me!. It has prevented me from making and keeping friends in the past!. As for the anxiety, well I just try to get through it!. I kinda talk myself down if I'm having a strange fear (which I think is totally weird that I can have a fear of something that I know is rediculus!)!. I've never seen a therapist and I've recently started thinking about going back to church again (but with a different attitude)!. I think it actually helps that I have a husband who just thinks I'm weird sometimes!. ;-) Being weird isn't all that bad!. As for your questions, I've never really felt normal, though I can act it pretty well!. I gave myself self-confidence by trying to stop worrying so much about what other people thought, though I still struggle with this!. And I feel worthy as a person when I help someone out, when my children learn knew things, when I accomplish something, ect!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

For me it was a decision-I wasn't going to allow myself to be defined by my brain that turned on me-as far as I was concerned!. I knew I was stronger than that and I just insisted I would get better and I did!.
This doesn't mean I don't have moments of weakness-when it all seems to crumble around me-but I just pick it up again the next day and start over-kind of like a recovering alcoholic-one day at a time!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

move to a new city with lots of sunshine, make new friends, exercise, volunteer where you help other people to get your mind off your own problems, start a new hobby that keeps you very busy, get a dog, stay away from people that are critical and negative (even if they are family)!. All these helped me!. Good luck!Www@Answer-Health@Com

The therapist and any other treatment will work when you stop getting lots of attention from the therapist and other people who you tell your problems!.
Until you stop feeling sorry for yourself and start listening to the advice from the therapist you will never be over the problems you have I think your just attention seeking!. Www@Answer-Health@Com

dancemeditation (dancemeditation!.org)
yoga (available pretty much everywhere)
nonviolent communication - get the book of that name by marshall rosenberg!.
aikido/judo

these things have led to my happiness and gratitude with my life!.
nothing about jesus or therapy!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

only time and good friends!. friends that like you for you, not for what you have or what you can do for them!. keep yourself occupied with happy things, and avoid potentially harmful people and situations, even if it means family!. Www@Answer-Health@Com

exercise, family, friends, good rest, good diet!.!.!.!. a healthy lifestyle is best!. oh and keeping your days active and productive!. this has helped me, i hope it helps you!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

music!.!.!.!.i learned to play the guitar and now whenever i am upset i pull it out and put all my emotions into whatever i am playing!.!.!.!.it helps me a lotWww@Answer-Health@Com

are you kidding!? All that's left is diet and exercise, which is the first thing you should have tried right out of the chute!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

Stop looking for external answers!. You have to deal with what's in there!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

abilify and lamictalWww@Answer-Health@Com

Honestly, time is the only thing that has helped me get past last Christmas when my grandfather died three days before Christmas and his body was still in the bed, just as he had died !.!.!. I was so depressed for months, my boyfriend couldn't even cheer me up a little bit!. Time is helping me and I still want to cry and scream and curse God out every single time someone says how they are excited for Christmas!. Just be happy with yourself, healthy and work at your own pace to get to a point you feel comfortable!. If you do need help, go to friends and family that you can trust!. I wish you the best of luck in getting beyond the depression!.

Oh, and I still don't feel "normal"!. I wanted to tell my manager at work today that the snow flakes and stuff were pissing me off but for her sake, I lied and said it looks great!. Normal is over rated and I don't think I will ever be the same again!. Www@Answer-Health@Com

Hey, honestly, if your life has been that f*cked up!.!.!. then you should be willing to try anything!.!.!. So here is a great tip!.!.!. watch cartoons!.!.!. a lot of cartoons!.!.!. funny cartoons!.!.!. just watch some thing that makes you laugh!.!.!. but with no real story invovled!.!.!. just simple cartoons!.!.!. for simple laughter!.!.!.
Don't take any drugs!.!.!. or listen to any tard!.!.!. just do stuff that others seem to enjoy!.!.!. just look at others!.!.!. see what people like and what people find fun!.!.!. and do it!.!.!. go mini golfing!.!.!. go look at some puppies!.!.!. watch cartoons!.!.!. and also (That's 70's Show!.!.!.!. Family guy, South Park!.!.!. Disney Channel) It'll work!.!.!. i'm not jokingWww@Answer-Health@Com

I can only share what works for me!.
Exercise!.!.!.hate it in the beginning but it totally helps which keeps me motivated!.
Self help books (since you are down on therapy) it sounds like the one titled "10 Days to Self Esteem" might be a good start for you!.
Friends!. Had to make some new ones and found them in a support group!.
Getting active!. Started taking advantage of community events, walks, fund raisers, volunteering for stuff!.!.!.!. whatever I could do out in the world that wasn't expensive!.
Breathing!. I learned to control my shallow breathing and breath long, strong breaths from my stomach and I learned to stop my anxiety!!
Good luck
I wish you peace!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

take one day at a time!. strive for perspective, and dont isolate yourself to the voice in your head telling you youre worthless!. think of that buzzing annoying friggin as hell nat in your ear as more!.!.!.!.!. like motivation to get through your Ffffed up existence!.!.!.!. quickly and painlessly!. no, i am not referring to suicide though some people might think other wise!.

i feel you on the rapture bit, my mother is a reborn again christian and i constantly make the back handed remark that she is apart of an unrecognized suicidal army of zombie bots!. she wonders where i get MY morbidness!. as for the shrink counseling, nope not going to tell you that!. my rm (whom i love to death) i think is getting a chemical make over with the stuff they are pumping her up on!. i sure will miss her!.

for you, me well!.!.!.!.!. there is pure determination, an over active survival drive and a never ending blipping in and out of reality!. you learn to deal!. some days are ok, some days are well!.!.!. missing!. i hadnt realized how far gone i was till someone came a long and gave me a jolt of courage!. like a transfusion, open heart surgery, just a whole new wild way of looking at the world!. (this is reason why i counsel broadening your perspective) if it wasnt for him i might have well succeeded in suicide!. i know i was very set on going into the void, and no one i knew knew how to help me!.

it wasnt enough that i could tell they cared!. my friends and family were monsters wearing their faces, or vica versa!. i couldnt trust anyone, and i felt an over whelming sense of failure and doom and agonizing lonliness!.!.!. the latter i didnt really pay proper heed to, becuz hey! i purposely isolated myself to wallow in my never ending shame!. someone sorta, just made me see or let me know i had the will to see something wonderful in the world that could still be!. i dont know!. i wont call it hope!. it wasnt that really!. i have no hope!. its just there is a sense of tomorrow, and there is no escaping it!. so!.!.!. instead of fighting it, or cowaring back from it i kinda try to see how i can shape tomorrow!. i dont dwell much in the present, and i studiously avoid the past that seeks to drag me under!. the future is how you gotta look at it!. accept your mistakes, admit your limitations, and then decide where you want to go from there!.

find friends that love for your worse, most unredeamable traits!. take care of them!. dont suffer fools, or people who are worse than you just becuz they make you look good in comparison!. they wont help you, and will in all likelyhood drag you down into a worse **** hole than you know!. dont look down on people who are in that **** hole you cant imagine presently, help them if you want, but dont poke fun at their misery!. karma is a *****!. remember and honor those that were there and that matter, remember the people who screwed you over and call them the day you make your first million and just laugh on the other end!. you're human and so are the rest of us primates!. dont ever close yourself off to people, just becuz its hard to find those few that will be there to the end of time!. its a slow demise!.

my personal advice and this is something that not just anyone can follow!. you dont have to forigve wrong doing, and you certainly shouldnt forget it, but nor do you have to let it hold you down!. dont ever deny your feelings, be them hate, love, anger, sadness, etc!. fully embrace them, and dont repress!. if they are too strong!.!.!. defuse the situation and back up!. this takes a lot of practice, (this coming from someone who prefers using her fists as apposed to calm, level words) to have consciousness of presence and state of mind to take that minute and fully feel it away, and even more self control to put it aside and deal with a situation that needs you to be rational, not someone seeing 6in sales men w/bat wings flying around a room laughing gleefully that they gave back the peanut butter but stole the pots!. however never stop moving toward your goal, be it to make dinner, or find a job that can pay for the little things that make you happy like peanut butter, and pots that need to be replaced!. and you know kinda ignore that constant craving for pancakes that you despise to be served to you on a silver platter!. you know pancakes are posion to you!.

Www@Answer-Health@Com

Well if you've ruled out theraphy and relgion ( I dont really support either to be honest) the best option is self-meditation!.

Learn about the law of attraction, discover the metaphysical world!.!.If your someone thats into fantasy, adventure or change this will be great for you!. It'll open your eyes to a lot universal truths!.

There's really no easy answer to this question as each persons answer is relative but logically speaking if you can find a purpose in your life you will find happiness!. What do you like to do the most!? What topics capture your heart!? Get involved in them, make a difference in things that drive you nuts!.

You say that recently you've started to feel better!.!.!.!.what has happened in your life recently that could've sparked these emotions of happiness!? How can you recreate them or find them through different venues etc!.

best of luck to you man!.!.!.we've all had a taste of it at one point in our lives and im only 19!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

To be honest!.!.!. I have had 'closet depression' for most of my life!. I've had to be picture perfect for everyone but myself!. I come from a Christian home and an extremely conservative family!. They don't believe in depression and they do not believe in medicating for depression or anxiety!. They only believe in therapists if they are "Christian counselors"!.

So!.!.!. I have had to learn ways of helping myself without asking for help!. From my experience, the BEST thing you can do is to focus your energy on bettering yourself and making yourself feel better!.

I started to really eat better, drink more water and cut out soda as much as possible, I have made sure I get enough sunlight (you actually get 'feel good vitamins' from the sun) and fresh air, made sure I get some physical activity every day, and that I allowed myself to truly enjoy something each day!.

I also started to find ways to show myself how lucky I am and to help those that are not as fortunate!. Volunteering has done a lot for me!. I have gotten to a place that felt like I couldn't be any lower!. Meeting these people!.!.!. it's life changing!. You realize how lucky/blessed you actually are!. Hospice, children's hospitals, homeless shelters or even animal shelters!. Even if you only have 30 minutes a month to dedicate!.!.!. it's worth it!.

Something else that I have learned to do is to literally convince myself otherwise!.!.!. call it meditation if you will, but I actually make myself think about relaxing!. I make myself focus on what is right and not what is wrong!.

I live by this statement, "This Too Shall Pass"!.

I'm sure most of this seems like a bunch of wishful thinking!. I hope you find what works for you!. Take care of YOU!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

Lexapro and Seroquel!. I take both ( the seroquel helps me sleep)!.
Also, start answering questions here and in categories that you know about!. I find it very enjoyable to help others on here!. It give me a little bit of purpose and makes me feel good to help others!.
When I am not in the mood to answer, I just read some of the questions and there are times it actually makes me count my blessings!.
Get outside ad ride a bike, you can buy a new one for like 100!.00 ( I did), or get a used one, but whatever get out and ride!. I does wonders for me, physcialy and mentally!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

No one deserves to be 'scrapped'!. Believe me, I've been there, and thought it too!.

It takes a long time to get back to a point where you feel ok again, but there will always be that hidden fear that you'll fall back into that void!. I myself found most of my haven in writing, friends, and trying to focus on helping others!. In the end I do ignore most of my own problems, but one has to learn to work on that too!. Always room for improvement!.

Crazy as it sounds, perhaps finding a job where you serve others would help!. Nothing makes you feel more worthwhile and alive than helping someone, and them thanking you!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

This is going to sound weird, but a good book!. Sometimes getting inside someone elses head and escaping your own problems help!.

Other things in combinations, like babying myself!.!.!. treating myself to favorite foods, baths, little gifts!.!.!.renting all my favorite movies etc!.!.!.excercise is good for morale if you can get yourself out there But these are merely temporary fixes, however on a dark day they help!.

Also not spending too much time alone, even if you're not talking with people go out and read in a coffee house or go to the gym, get some friends together for dinner and drinks!.
Isolation = getting wrapped up in your own thoughts= depression!.

I also take a low dose of lexapro!.
If you have a significant other--- have more sex, it helps me
endorphines are good!.

hope some of this helped :-)
best of luck Www@Answer-Health@Com

I'm sorry you've been through so much!. I'm glad things have lifted up lately!. This is what's worked for me:

1!. Having a daily routine that included exercise and time being around other people!.(Self confidence)
2!. Journal writing (when you keep track of your own symptoms you'll see what has been going on that makes you feel more normal - what works for me may not do a thing to help you)
3!. Appreciating life!. I thought my problems were bad - until I lost someone close to me!.
4!. You will not always feel bad, but when it happens you'll know what to do (ref your journal)!. So therefore YOU ARE NOT DOOMED!. Chemically, some people have to spend time working on their emotions!. It is a health issue -- just like a diabetic has to watch their diet for the rest of their lives, you may have to assess your emotions and control them!. Www@Answer-Health@Com

Get out and be around people who don't preach and nag to you and have a good time, maybe go on a vacation or get a hobby like riding horses or throwing a ball around with some friends!. Go to more concerts, enjoy meeting new people and forget about the things that got you down in the first place, or at least try!. If you like to learn enroll in a night class at a local college to make yourself feel involved in something and add to your career at the same time!. one class a semester wouldn't be too expensive!. just do what makes you feel happy!!Www@Answer-Health@Com

unless you have already tried this!.!.!. i think you should visit the church of jesus Christ of latter day saints!. Mormons are really nice people and will help you out in any way possible!. if you need food, help moving furniture, someone to water your plants when you go out of town, or if you just need someone to talk to!.!.!. you name it!. it helped me :)

you could also start a project like!.!.!. taking art classes, redecorating your bedroom or reading a really good book!.
i suggest getting a puppy!.Www@Answer-Health@Com





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