PLEASE HELP ME! i really need it!?!


Question: PLEASE HELP ME! i really need it!!?
i am an 18 year old girl!. and i have absolutely no confidence!. i hate my looks so much but everyone tells me im really good looking i just really don't see it, i hate looking in the mirror i guess you could say!. i don't have a job as i am too nervous to start one, i left school early due to having no interest & having no friends! I have one 'friend' who only see each other when we are going out at the weekends, we have grow up together and have known her my whole life but we always fall out!. she is much more confident than me!. i don't know why i am like this as i love being out around people!. i would love to get a job to have my own money and have way more friends than one, i just don't know how to get out of myself! i grew up in a house with a lot of physical fights(could that be something to do with it!?)!. there are no youth centres where i live to do anything so that wont help!. i have only had one boyfriend that i broke up with after 2 weeks!. there is a boy that i really have a crush on but he doesn't know me at all & i don't think i can make the first move as i am shy!.
Please if you could, can you give me good advice as all this lack of confidence is bring me down & holding me back in life!.
Thank you so much in advance and please no sarcastic replies
:)Www@Answer-Health@Com


Answers:
Just to say to you!.!.
Hello Hattie,
Firstly I must tell you how you feel and think about yourself is not uncommon!. There are so many people who suffer from the same problems!.

When we begin to loose confidence in ourselves, unless we have someone there who can help with these feelings, then we begin to go lower and lower into a place we just feel "comfortable" to be!.!.!.
I had just the same feelings as you are having now, but, I was older than you are!.!.!.!.
You mention youth centers!. Here in the UK we would not think of a youth center for someone being 18 yrs!.
This is why sometimes things are so difficult to answer!.
If our communities had the finances available to give over certain centers for YOUTH CENTERS then, perhaps we would not find ourselves in the awful situations with young people we have today!.!.!.
Can I just say to you that from the age of 13 I had a "good" friend!.
Until something else turned up, then I was dropped!.!.!.
Later, I thought I had a good friend with whom I worked!.
We went out together always, did all the stupid things friends do, but souldn't do!.!.
I thought we would always be there for each other!.
Then something changed!.
I had never let "boys" come between us!.
Yet as soon as she found her "man" I was dropped again!.
What I have learned over these many years, is to do what you need, what you feel able to do for yourself!.
Do not think you will always have that "friend" there for you!.
What I let happen to me was because of my lack of confiedence, lack of self esteem!.
Then, I had no-one at all to share my feelings with!.
You have been able to share yours!.
You can and will be strong!.
You are young!.!.
We are all shy, well lots of us!
Lack of confidence is just as common as those who are so self-assured!.!.
All we need is someone who can help give us that confidence in ourselves!.!.
Do not think because you broke up with a boyfriend after 2 weeks that you will not find someone who will care for you!.!.!.
It will probably happen when you least expect it to!.
You have a crush on a boy who you think does not know you!.
Then let him know you!.!.!.!.!.
Make sure you are around the places you know he goes!.
Be there, let him see you!.!.
Then "bump" into him and say "oh sorry"!.!.
Just be around!.!.!.
If it's going to happen, then it will happen!.!.
You can influence that happening !.!.!.!.

Hope this gives you a little confiedence to go forward and make a move!.



Www@Answer-Health@Com

don't worry what people think about you so much!.!.be yourself!.!.!.if you are relaxed and yourself!.!.the friend's will come and you will be much happier!.!.!.not everyone is going to like you, not everyone is going to hate you!.!.just find good people and stick with them!.!.!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

You are definitely not the only one with confidence issues (I have them too), so don't worry!. Things will get better!. My advice to you is to stop allowing negative thoughts about yourself to come up!. When they do, always replace them with a positive thought about yourself!. Know that you are perfectly acceptable the way that you are; you do not need to be perfect!. Start looking for reasons to validate your greatness!. Look for ways to praise and love yourself!. Try to only notice and expand on the good things about yourself!. Realize that you are a completely lovable person that deserves to have a great life and others in it!. You have absolutely no limits at all: they are all in your mind!. Imagine what you would do if it was impossible to fail!. That can be your reality!. It may take some time, but try some of the things I have suggested and I guarantee you will grow much more confident!.
If you grew up in a house with a lot of physical fights, then I'm guessing that you didn't receive much love from those around you!. But it wasn't your fault at all!. You deserved better, and that was unfair!. Don't let that continue to bring you down today though!. The past is the past!.
As for your crush, take it slow!. Try to just be friends first!. Maybe that will take away some of the nerves and help you to relax!. Know that you don't need a guy to complete you, so if things don't work out, it's okay!. You will find the perfect person somewhere down the road, I guarantee it!.
Good luck and take care!. I truly hope things work out for you! Www@Answer-Health@Com





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