Depression is hurting our marriage?!
Question: Depression is hurting our marriage!?
I suffer from depression and social anxiety disorder!. My husband and I recently moved and I don't know anyone here!. It has been easy for me to become isolated!. He gets frustrated and feels that he has to "babysit" me every time we go hang out with friends, because I stay right by him the whole time!.
I have been seeing a counselor and started taking zoloft!. I really don't want my behavior to ruin our marriage!. Are there any tips or words of advice you can give me to help get over this depression!?
Thank youWww@Answer-Health@Com
I have been seeing a counselor and started taking zoloft!. I really don't want my behavior to ruin our marriage!. Are there any tips or words of advice you can give me to help get over this depression!?
Thank youWww@Answer-Health@Com
Answers:
Sounds like you have a good husband there, so congrats, but I can understand how this must be difficult for you both!. You may not want to hear this but it might also help!.
All behaviour serves a purpose!.
By being so supportive is it possible that your husband is (unknowingly) rewarding your social anxiety!?
What would happen if instead, he found some way to reward improved social confidence!?
Behaviours tend to grow bigger and more habitual!. Which behaviours to you choose to develop from today onward!? Make sure the good ones have rewards!.
Your words are interesting - 'It has been easy to become isolated!.!.!.' What are some less easy options!? Write down 5 then follow up at least one or two!.
The steps forward might not be easy (and might require both to change) but a wise person once told me ' It's as hard as you make it'!.
good luck
Lee-Anne
http://MentalHealthMadeEasy!.com
Www@Answer-Health@Com
All behaviour serves a purpose!.
By being so supportive is it possible that your husband is (unknowingly) rewarding your social anxiety!?
What would happen if instead, he found some way to reward improved social confidence!?
Behaviours tend to grow bigger and more habitual!. Which behaviours to you choose to develop from today onward!? Make sure the good ones have rewards!.
Your words are interesting - 'It has been easy to become isolated!.!.!.' What are some less easy options!? Write down 5 then follow up at least one or two!.
The steps forward might not be easy (and might require both to change) but a wise person once told me ' It's as hard as you make it'!.
good luck
Lee-Anne
http://MentalHealthMadeEasy!.com
Www@Answer-Health@Com
If you have just begun seeing a counselor, continue on to see if this helps!.
However, it you've been going to a counselor for a while, maybe 6 months or so, and see no improvement, I think you should try to find another counselor!. Your present counselor will not be offended -- they know that some counselor/patient matches are just not a good match!.
Next time you go out with your husband, force yourself to talk to a new person!. Look around for another female who looks a little uncomfortable too!. This may help you get rid of some of the anxiety of meeting new people
Good luck to you!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
However, it you've been going to a counselor for a while, maybe 6 months or so, and see no improvement, I think you should try to find another counselor!. Your present counselor will not be offended -- they know that some counselor/patient matches are just not a good match!.
Next time you go out with your husband, force yourself to talk to a new person!. Look around for another female who looks a little uncomfortable too!. This may help you get rid of some of the anxiety of meeting new people
Good luck to you!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Sometimes it takes a few different meds!. to get it right ,but it will get better!. Just hang in there!. Your husband needs to support you on this!. I don't know why he hasn't talked to the counselor also because this would help him to understand your situation better!. Good Luck!. YOUR NOT ALONE!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Have you ever read the book "The Three Boxes of Life"!? How about "Illusions" and "How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World" (free download available)!? The beautiful thing is that you have options!. You have to try to change your behavior as well as what you eat!. Not 100% or overnight but small changes in your routine!. First for at least three weeks keep a food diary and task log of every half hour!. Use the internet to look for foods and herbs that fight depression!. Exercise may also be of help!. Sounds like you may also have a great dependency on others to make decisions for you!. Affectionate also!. These are all great things but can you make a little time and space (one hour per day) to be by yourself and examine your own thoughts to your own life!? Second, after three weeks try to make small changes in what you eat and what hobbies you pursue independent of your husband!. You may need to seek out a life coach or consultant and especially a nutritionist for starters!. Find ways to increase your feelings of self worth and confidence!. Study behavior replacement!. You can do it!. Study natural ways on fighting depression and social anxiety disorder!.Www@Answer-Health@Com