My mother is handicapped and we get stares?!


Question: My mother is handicapped and we get stares!?
My mother is handicapped and every time I go places with her, we always get stares!. I can't take it!. I don't like it when people stare at us mostly her!. It makes me depressed a little bit!. What can we do!?Www@Answer-Health@Com


Answers:
I had this same problem when I was out with my mother when she was in a wheelchair!.

I don't know if there is anything you can do!. "Custody of the eyes," meaning not staring inappropriately, seems to not be practiced very much!. With children, it can be innocent curiosity, but I know you are stared at by adults as much if not more than by children!. Below are some answers others posted re how they deal!.

I know people will always look at anything unusual, but it's common courtesy to immediately look away from any abnormality, once noticed!.

The only thing I can think of is to get a T-shirt or ball cap printed with the logo "staring is rude" or "staring is impolite" or something to that effect!.

Another thing to do, unfortunately, is lower your expectations of what will happen when you go out so you won't be hurt each time!. My therapist is always catching me out for getting upset over X b/c he says I've experienced this exact same thing before, and I should expect it now!. And to not expect it is to have unrealistic expectations!.

Another thought is, when it's possible, to go out when the crowds are less!. Go to lunch as soon as the restaurant opens!. Ditto the mall!. In other words, since you can't get rid of these rude people, go when there are a few less of them around!. If it is happening at your church, talk to the pastor/priest/whatever, and him or her to speak to the congregation about it when you skip a Sunday!. Some people can be taught manners!.

If you are really bold, you might even consider, before entering a restaurant, running in before you take your mother, and announce you are about to bring a handicapped person inside and would appreciate no staring!. Or call ahead, in the privacy of your own room, and ask the restaurant manager to be prepared to make this announcement at X time!. At a restaurant, if you have a fav one, you could have, with the manager's permission, little flyers inserted into the menu on your regular day of attendance announcing that handicapped patrons do visit the restaurant, and please not to stare as this makes them uncomfortable!.

I feel your pain and frustration!. I just figured that other people have zero manners and even less sense, and god help them if they ever need others to have "custody of their eyes" for their own sake!.

One thing that helped me through this was remembering that everyone else was "temporarily non-disabled!." Almost all of us end up disabled to some degree at some point, and these folks will be reaping what they are sowing when their time in a chair or on a walker rolls around!.

You are very compassionate and an incredible daughter!. I admire you!.

Sending love and light your way!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

I agree with some people on here, I think many people stare out of curiosity, they don't mean to, but automatically when you see someone a bit different, people do seem to stare out of human nature!. Some people on the other hand are just a**holes!. You can either chose to just ignore them or if they are bothering you that much, I would speak up & ask them what they are looking at!. Www@Answer-Health@Com

Some people are rude, some people are curious, and some people are afraid to AVOID eye contact cos it's more rude than looking! There isn't much you can do about it but be strong!. When I see handicapped people I look, smile (in a friendly way, not laughing way), and continue with what I was doing - others should do that as well, don't you think!?Www@Answer-Health@Com

Most people stare because it's not something they are used to seeing or they don't know how to react!. They feel like they should do something but they don't know what!. They probably feel awkward as well, if they are close just say hi, otherwise ignore them!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

ignore em, live with it!.
Im sure you love your mom more than you hate people looking at you!.

Yes, you shouldn't have to live with it but so it is!. Www@Answer-Health@Com

People are rude!. Just ignore them!.
Your mother is your mother, no matter what!. She loves you!. Www@Answer-Health@Com

caue people wonder what their life would be like in her position!. that and some others are just ignorantWww@Answer-Health@Com





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