How can I deal with occasional severe anxiety?!


Question: How can I deal with occasional severe anxiety?
I'm absolutely fine and normal practically all the time. I get a little nervous if I'm waiting to see the doctor or speak with a professor, but nothing serious. But lately I've been getting into the job interview circuit, and THAT absolutely destroys me. I'm fine until about an hour before the interview, at which point I get so incredibly nervous, beyond anything, that I can't talk without stuttering or voice shaking, my body physically shakes, its absolutely terrible. As bad as it sounds, I've dealt with it by having 2 or 3 beers in that last hour. It does the trick, but if I'm going to medicate for this I want to do it proper. If I don't, the symptoms only get worse.

This happens rarely enough that I can't practice it, and only in those situations- i'm a totally normal dude otherwise. Any tips? Should I talk to a doctor?

Answers:

I can't believe people are telling you to get a diagnosis! This is normal, to be very anxious before a job interview. What other people have learned is to cover up their anxiety. My husband, who used to hire people, says you need to remember that the person doing the hiring is not a god, they are just a person.

In my case, I was a very shy person, so shy that the teachers thought I had intellectual disabilities (the old word was mentally retarded). I knew this would be a problem, so in junior high I went into plays, and then in high school, did debate and speech. I was still very nervous, but I learned not to squeak with fear, not fidget, etc. So now I look pretty cool and confident, but this was learned, this is not how I feel inside a lot of the time. I have bipolar disorder and anxiety goes along with that, so I fake it fake it fake it.

I also coached debate so here are some tips - do some role playing with your parents or other older person. It would be great if there is someone to practice with who actually does hire people. another tip is to pay attention to your voice - speak slowly (when nervous, people speed up) and make sure you don't raise your pitch really high - keep it normal. nervous people get squeaky. don't fidget, don't click your pen. Have a note to look at right before the interview to remind you of these things (Even Obama used to have reminders like this on his speech notes, I have read, but in any case, I did that when I did speeches).

most people are nervous as hell if they really need a job, they cover it up.

you don't want to take a pill for this. the benzos are addictive, and they cause amnesia. they can also cause aggression. because of their addictive properties, medicare doesn't even cover them on the drug plan, so you know they have to be pretty bad that way.

Drinking alcohol before is a bad idea - you will not be sharp, and also the interviewer has a good chance of smelling it on your breath no matter how many breath mints you eat.

good luck

PS It looks like the answer that told you to get diagnosed got removed somehow. so that part of my answer won't make sense :-)



I had problems with anxiety too, and still do but the best way to handle it is to just keep moving forward! I know that you don't want to hear that because I didn't and I tried going to the doctor the medicine didn't help but it did make me feel broken, you know like I was half a person because I couldn't handle some stress. I finally realized I have to trust God to help me through it and he always does! I understand if you don't share what I believe but i suggest you give it a try before going to take medicine for it.




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