I have BPD and want to kill myself.?!
Question: I have BPD and want to kill myself.?
Anyway, i do not form lasting friendships, have very few of them, dont go out, dont spend time with family but alone.
This guy's case just assured me that I'm worthless and evil. He certainly thinks so if I keep leaving and coming back. And I aint surprised he does. Therefore, i think its gonna be like this all the time, that i wont have a normal relationship with a guy, and wont be able to control these anxiety moments.
I'm so feral, why not to kill myself?
Answers:
Find someone who really cares about you and understands you.
Don't kill yourself over this worthless chump who obviously doesn't care about YOU. He's probably one of those people who just want a friend with benefits.
You need to be in counseling so that you can learn to understand yourself better and work on these issues that are holding you back in forming relationships. I'm bipolar too, so I understand your frustration and sadness. Therapy has helped me a lot though along with medication, maybe it could help you too. Good luck.
your destructive behavior typifies a BPD, you should be working with a therapist and not asking question of people on YA!. You don't know how to trust. I guarantee no one here can give you what you need or what you want to here. Attention seeking behavior by posting on Yahoo is not going to fix it. The fact is until you sit in a counselors office and work on your "issues" your relationships will be tumultuous.
Truth be told, there is hope. But you have to be willing to explore things IN DETAIL with a therapist. only you know what those "Things" are. And yes, I've known borderlines who have done this and gotten past what appeared to insurmountable.
hi, i too have bpd and all is not hopeless
i have had many of the pushing and pulling issues and still do but i am learning to make friends (at 27)
I am married and finding the right guy helped as well as being honest about bpd but not using it as an excuse (which I am not saying you are)
i made my friends through roller derby
i only have a few and we aren't super close because it's still new
I am on a few meds to help and learning to accept myself was the main thing that helped me feel okay, i am lonely at times and i have found things that help like reading
for the most part though i can see others around me who have it worse
before you make any decisions about killing yourself try asking a few of your old friends what they truly think of you and i think that you may be surprised by their answers i 'd bet that they felt like you didn't want them around and not that you are evil or unworthy.
boys can be cruel don't let that get you down even the most popular of girls has boys that are mean to her ( though it's hard to picture)