HELP ME...please...........?!


Question: HELP ME...please...........?
please please, this is not me looking for attention, i just want some help.

I'm on anti-depressant medication for i dunno 3 years maybe more, who knows at this stage.
I go to my psychiatrist on regular basis.
My parents especially my Mum do everything in the power to help me.
So why am I like this?
I spend days after days sitting in my room. I can never remember the last time I washed my hair.
I self harm although I have stopped doing that a lot as i don't see the point if it doesn't kill me but leaves scares strangers ask about.
I want to die but I'm to much of a pu$$y to actually do it, although I've been in a&e for overdose and I took all my medication 2 weeks ago and went to sleep, i woke up and felt dizzy for the whole day and that's it I didn't tell my parents or doctor because I don't see the point nothing happened why worry people?
I want to die i pray every night I won't wake up.
I shake uncontrollably and have panic attacks by myself with only myself to calm me down, i have lost all my friends and before they meant the world to me. I am in my final year of school and am supposed to be studying and aiming towards my Leaving Cert(final exams in june in Ireland) but i find i am only doing this(or attempting) because everyone tells me I'll ruin my life if i don't.
But my life is all ready ruined i have ruined my life.
I want to go to hospital but you must be referred but my psychiatrist twists every word and sentence and spins into something that its not, i find i can't tell her sh!t anymore because I hate how she makes me feel, I cant ask for a new doctor as i go to a free service. I just don't want the pain anymore.
I just want some advice on what to do... please. help me.

Answers:

Okay, this might be long because I genuinely want to help you.

"My parents especially my Mum do everything in the power to help me."

You're lucky to have such supportive parents. However, have you told them what is really going on in your mind? If they don't know what is happening then they can't help you. You need to be completely open to them, tell them EXACTLY what is on your mind and I also suggest you tell them about the overdose of tablets 2 weeks ago.

Taking all your tablets was a really stupid thing to do. If you didn't wake up it would have completely destroyed your parents lives. They would have probably blamed themselves. Next time you even have those thoughts enter your mind think about the consequences properly. It's those who you leave behind who will suffer the most.

"But my life is all ready ruined i have ruined my life."

You're only 18, you have your whole life ahead of you. Chances are you'll look back in 10 years time when you're married to a great guy and have kids, etc. and wonder what the heck you were thinking of. I know it may seem impossible to have a normal and happy life but believe me it is absolutely 100% possible. It might take a while but you'll get there.

What else are you doing to help with the stress, depression and panic attacks besides taking anti depressants and seeing a psychiatrist? There are changes you can you make right now which I promise will make you feel better. Here are some things which I find help:

Make sure you're sleeping properly. Don't sleep too little or too much. If you can't get off to sleep or keep waking up during the night with feelings of depression, just remind yourself that it's your mind playing tricks on you. Grab a pen and paper and write down exactly what is on your mind and go back to bed. Everytime a new thought enters your head, write it down.

Make sure you exercise. Exercise is honestly one of the best things you can do to help with mental illness. Even if it's just a short walk, it will make you feel better. It will be really difficult to get off your **** and do it sometimes but it's totally worth it for the feeling afterwards.

Some supplements can help alongside the anti depressants, especially fish oils. I take them every single day and they've definitely helped me. Make sure you get ones high in EPA and DHA (I recommend Natures Best brand). Studies have proven that they make a big difference to mental health.

You really need friends. Either contact your old ones and meet up with them or make new ones. I kind of know how you feel because I lost all of my friends during a long term illness. I'm now 21 and haven't been in contact with them for years and it does really get me down sometimes.

So to sum it up:

Be completely open and honest with your parents.
Change your psychiatrist, not all of them are the same! You may need to change your medication as well.
Next time you even think about overdosing, think of what it'd do to your parents if you didn't wake up.
Make sure your sleep is good.
Exercise.
Take fish oils.
Socalise and make friends.

You'll be OK. Good luck.



I'm going to kill myself



You don't need to think like that



i have been looking after my mum for 8 years and she also takes anti-depressants and i also have now got depression through taking care of her, i feel as if i am doing it all alone as i look after my 3 sisters when she is taken into a psychiatric ward for weeks on end, but dont worry hun, you aint the only one. i find the best way to deal with it is to talk to a stranger, they dont know anything about you so you dont have to feel embarressed and they cant judge you too much. you need to find someone to teel all your secrets and problems to, and just feel the weight lift off your shoulders hun :) take care :)



I know it's hard when you feel alone, and that nothing around you is working out as you'd like, but all i can really think to ask is what interests you? what things do you enjoy?

It sounds like shitty advice, but if you just take time out every now and again just to chill out, and do whatever makes you feel a bit happier then you'll slowly start to feel a bit better about yourself. There is no quick fix, but if you can see and value the positive things around you it makes coping with negative things easier.

sorry if this isn't a good enough answer, but i hope it helps you, even if it's just a little bit :)




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